hi!
@Hilltop9394
heyo. this is gonna be totally weird and maybe you won’t get this! we don’t know! but my L account is for some reason not working so I can’t get into it and I can’t talk:/ since this is my member account I can only talk through forums. So for the foreseeable future while i see what’s going on i’ll say hi through here. If you get this.
oh! if you don’t recognize me remember bob 😎
ok! hopefully you see this!
oh no. i’m sorry. do you wanna talk about it?
it was pretty chill last day of spring break
@steph8402 well at work we stared talking about dumb videos of us when we were younger and I don’t have any videos of me cause I didn’t like myself to make them and I didn’t have any to show because of I don’t talk to people. And all this just got me thinking about all my problems.
@Hilltop9394 And then my coworkers dad came for some reason and we started talking about our dads. But I didn’t have anything to say because I hate my dad. Which sounds so stupid and emo but I don’t want to but I just do. So all day I was thinking about my problems and was upset
@Hilltop9394 And then like an our ago my mom was asking me why I always seem so upset and in the last two years my grades have been horrible and said she’s thinking about calling someone like a therapist or something. But I can’t have that that would basically be the end of everything. It would admit I have a problem and having everyone know that I go to therapy is humiliating and I would do anything to not have that.
@Hilltop9394 I’m sorry that was so long but everything feels horrible and I feel like everything’s getting worse.
ah i’m sorry that happened. i don’t have videos of me younger that i made either. if that makes you feel any better. but hey we all got some problems but that doesn’t mean we are bad or weak or a loser or anything. so you need to think about how amazing you are and the positives of you
i’m also sorry about your the dad talk. i’m also really hate my dad so i get that.
@steph8402 I’m sorry you feel that way. I wish you had a better relationship. It’s just difficult when it’s family and I don’t even have a reason or know why I hate him
oh you don’t have to apologize for it being too long. it is hard when you won’t really have a reason to hate a family member but it is normal it’s not like it doesn’t happen. do you think you have a reason to hate your dad? or can you think of one
@steph8402 Its a few things but I feel like they’re kinda petty. I hate how he raised my brother to be a *** cause that’s how he is or was. I hate how he blames my mom for stuff and makes her the butt of jokes. I think he’s a coward for saying things like my life is *** and I nobody loves me in front of his kids. And I really hate how he’s only sometimes bad. I hate how he’s funny and good with talking to people because I don’t wanna admired anything about him. I know it’s wrong and stupid but I sometimes wish he was worse so I could have a real reason to hate him
@Hilltop9394 I’m sorry I feel a big pathetic ranting about him like that.
hey. even if someone is sometimes good it doesn’t mean he is always. to the sounds of it he’s manipulating and kinda rude. which is reasonable to hate him.
sorry i’m not responding fast i keep having to refresh and it doesn’t do fast enough.
@steph8402 It’s ok I have the same problem and I’m doing the same thing. I’m sorry too
@steph8402 No it isn’t. And I hate how I’m bad at being mean or hating him. I wish I could leave at 18 and never speak to my family again but I know I’d feel too bad to do that. And it sounds way worse than it is. I’m probably over reacting a ton. I would put them no matter how much I hate them because they’re family. I hate how I’m similar to him too
it’s ok don’t apologize. and hey i think the same when i’m 18 i totally wanna leave and just cut them off but i just don’t think i could ever. why do you think you’re similar to your dad? and it’s ok not to hate your family and hate at the same time. it’s family and family is always complicated
@Hilltop9394 A few days ago he was talking about how his brother was always an *** hole and how he would always take advantage of people and was selfish. I don’t really remember what he said but the way he described it, it sounded exactly like my brother and me. And then I got worried cause I know that if baseball doesn’t work for my brother and he would ever came at my door asking for money or something I couldn’t say no. That probably sounds really mean or pretentious but that’s at least to me I could totally see him talking advantage of my inability to say no because he does it to me now
yeah. i’m sorry. that is hard but that’s when we gotta learn how to say no. and im saying we cos we’ll figure it out together! i’m sorry that is hard and i know that saying no is really difficult but i believe in you. little by little you will be able to do it.
I feel like my dad’s a more aggressive version of me. Like the way he talks and acts I feel like I would be a more confident version of him. Like if I didn’t grow up insecure or secluded I would have been like him. Even his bad qualities. Like the way he gets mad and says stuff like no body cares about me it reminds me of me and I don’t like it. And I don’t think I can do anything about it. And sorry I’m talking so much especially with me being a super slow and sloppy typer
no no ur not a sloppy typer! i’m sorry for responding late it’s a little confusing in forums sometimes haha. you are not your father whatsoever! you are a nicer better person who yea is a little insecure but is NOT manipulative or mean or makes fun of people like that.
@steph8402 Thank you for saying that. I just don’t really know what to do about this. It’s nice to get it off my chest but I’m not sure how to use this information to better myself.
@Hilltop9394 Thank you and I’m sorry you have that problem too. But yeah hopefully we can figure out how to say no together. But really thank you for listening to me.
of course i believe in you and id help and listen to you any time we’re twins! haha
yessir. we’re probably gonna rule the world obviously 🙄
exactlyyyyy well we’re on top of the world so like
🕺👼
🌎
haha yeah. well that’s us for sure. we’re way cool and everything.
@Hilltop9394 But what should or can I do? I just yapped for like an hour and I don’t really know what to do with it. It was nice to get it off my chest but I don’t know what to do with this information to better myself.
yeah that’s understandable. well what are some personality trait you want in yourself that your dad doesn’t have?
@steph8402 I want to not complain and to be more confident than him. I might be bad at reading people but he seems a bit insecure and unhappy with himself
ok. that’s good that you know something. what are traits that you think that you have that your dad doesn’t?
@steph8402 I’m not sure. I don’t think anything better though