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How Can I Show Love To Myself?

RumpleSteeleSkin November 30th, 2017

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Hello everyonesmiley I hope you all are doing ok todayheart I have observed a lot around 7cups as well as in my daily life on "how can I show myself love" Yes this simple question yet so hard for many to do. It can be due to many things. Trauma, not shown love, even mistrusting. Thing is no matter what we gone through- hell and back we can start learning to love ourselves. We deserve that and need that to live. Do you want to learn of some ways to start showing love to yourself? Come on and sit with me while I share a few things with youheart

Find the love you seek, by first finding the love within yourself. Learn to rest in that place within you that is your true home. – Sri Sri Ravi Shankar

Let's say you dont love yourself and see yourself as not beautiful nor good enough. Then comes a person who tells you how wonderful you are. Would you accept it? No, it is more likely you would think they are either lying, mad or not particularly picky. Self-love seems to be natural; you live your whole life with yourself, in your body. You spend more time with yourself than with anyone other you love, you understand yourself the best, and you are the one who keeps all of your secrets.

Then why do you have a problem with loving yourself? Isnt the self-love something we are born with? Unfortunately, not.

Many factors can jeopardize your self love and self respect.. These factors vary from your parent's influence in your childhood, your social environment and culture to your distorted self-image. Whatever the reason might be, living without loving yourself is exhausting, stressful and may induce many negative emotions. It means constant self-doubt, fear of not being (good, smart, pretty) enough, missing chances because of the low self-esteem, burdening other people with repeated request for approval and so on.

On the other hand, loving yourself means being able to feel self-compassion and empathy for your own feelings, to greet and compliment yourself as any other person you love, to accept yourself as an imperfect human being and forgive yourself for your mistakes.

How Can Mindfulness Help?

Regarding being in the present and entering mindfulness, loving yourself means finding a way to be kind, non-judgmental and aware of whatever happens to you or whatever you are experiencing. It is an unconditional positive attitude towards our inner experiences. In order to love ourselves, we should start by simply being gentle to ourselves, as we are to other people. It means acting kind and friendly towards our emotions. Learning to observe our emotions and be with them instead of getting overwhelmed by them, is a big step forward.This includes unpleasant emotions as well as pleasant ones. Pushing away negative experiences and clinging to positive ones is a bad strategy. We often create more suffering by doing so, because we turn to drinking alcohol or some other unhealthy coping mechanism. Accepting and mindfully experiencing our feelings such as sadness, fear or anxiety is not the sign of weakness but the sign of strength.

Exercise Loving Yourself Even if it Seems Silly Loving yourself is not something that happens overnight. It needs a lot of work, and the work doesn't stop once you get to your goal. You need to water your self-love plant every day if you want it to flourish. However, you will find the way that suits you the most to do this, but for self-love beginners – heres some help. These exercises might seem silly, but they work and produce a fuzzy warm feeling around your heart.

Be Your Own Cheerleading Coach

You are the only one who knows what you need or want to hear, or knows the right amount of love..

I am loveable.

I love and accept myself as I am right now.

I am smart and have multiple intelligences.

My belly holds my power and intuitive center and I am grateful for it.

My life has ups and downs just like everyone and I have enough right now.

Take Actions Guided by Self-Love Repetitively make positive affirmations to yourself such as the phrase: I am deserving of kindness. Support these thoughts with positive actions such as giving yourself more space in the day, patience, and creating better self-care practices.

Quality Time: Be Present with Self-Love Set aside time for daily mindfulness practices such as meditation, deep breathing or progressive muscle relaxation. These devotions will help you connect with your highest self.
Make time for leisure and hobbies. Time for play and enjoyment is an important aspect of celebrating the gift of life.
Prioritize sleep and exercise. You must reboot and revitalize your physical being.
Do not over-schedule, over-book or over-commit. Your life is worth more than being a gerbil on a wheel

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1. What do you find to be the hardest on showing yourself love? Is it a feeling? A thought? Does your body feel something?

2. Showing self love can be difficult for many, what are things that get in the way?

3. There are many reasons why we don't show ourselves love? Is there a way we can ask for some help?

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green18doz30 December 14th, 2017

Seeing the goood, remembering how gracefully accept what I have no control over .... rather than allowing bitterness, anger, and frustrations to seethe and ferment inside of me. See the good, be the good! Love... especially for myself.

3 replies
BlueSkyDay1911 December 15th, 2017

@green18doz30, thank you! I am learning to accept what I have no control over, but to still try my best and be positive. I think this is a real skill...to not be bitter or worried, but to be loving any way, and that starts with being aware of me, and letting others do and say what they need to!

2 replies
cyanOwl3282 December 15th, 2017

@BlueSkyDay1911

i agree with you both. For me, I have to really be present/conscious of what Im thinking (all the time it seems-does it get easier?)

Its exactly what you both said-concentrating on what I can and cannot control, dont let my thots carry me away to the past &/or future, but, concentrate on now. I sometimes yell in my head -STOP talking lol....just let moments happen-not everything is my ‘business to be analyzing things.

green18doz30 December 16th, 2017

@BlueSkyDay19

Gosh don't I knoooow it!!! I am sad that I wanted someone that didn't want me back. I felt like I lost something. At the same time, I gained something, me. In that regard, I do feel good about losing. It is just that, at times, it's like a battle unto yourself.

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SourButSweetCandy December 15th, 2017

Does meditation and yoga help with self love?

2 replies
1AlwaysThere1 December 15th, 2017

@SourButSweetCandy

For me, personally it did. But took a while to adapt to it.

Its like I become more aware of myself and realise what is good for me and what is not. Like, its sort of a coping strategy for me, and helps me to not depend on bad coping mechanisms.

Hope that helps.

Also, you can try to find out if it works for you.

1 reply
SourButSweetCandy December 15th, 2017

@1AlwaysThere1 yes! that's how i feel too, it's like you become more focused on positive stuff !

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Morfo66 December 15th, 2017

Journaling, letting all the thoughts out and releasing emotions I'm having.

1 reply
soulsings December 16th, 2017

@Morfo66 journalling is great. That is often the only place I can share what I am really thinking.

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goldenCucumber1287 December 19th, 2017

Watch a silly episode of reality tv and take a bubble bath. Ideally at the same time!

hypnosis December 22nd, 2017

heart Five minute morning meditation
heart Watching music videos before I fall asleep and singing to them...or lip-synch
heart Putting more effort into looking nice today