PL 101: Systems vs. Goals (Discussion 4)
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Hello Leadership Crew!
Welcome to our 4th discussion in this first course. In todays discussion, we will be talking about systems vs. goals.
To start, please read this post here  and watch this video.
The basic argument here is that having a system is better than having a goal. A system is a way of behaving that helps you move towards accomplishing something. A goal is usually and end state that happens after you have accomplished something. I think eating healthy is a good example. A goal might be to lose 10 pounds. In this case, you feel kind of bad about yourself until you hit that goal; and then, once you hit it, you kind of lose the purpose because the goal has been reached. If you relapse and gain wait again, then you fall back into feeling bad about yourself again. Contrast this with a system of eating healthy. A system might include things like: having a big glass of water prior to each meal; eating a lot of fruits, vegetables, and nuts; not eating after 9pm; and/or doing some level of intermittent fasting. You wouldnt integrate all of these new healthy eating behaviors at once. Instead, youd gradually introduce one and then another and then another over whatever period of time makes sense. The system enables you to continuously get healthier and healthier. You will eventually reach the goal, but itll be the byproduct of eating healthy.
Another example might be education. I dont really care all that much about grades for my kids. I mostly want them to learn and enjoy learning. We talk about what they learn, we draw things, they make their own educational videos, they explain things to me in their own words etc. I want them to have a system of learning and refining their perspective on things. If they have this system, then having good grades will be a natural result of enjoying learning.
This also has implications for 7 Cups as well. We might have goals of having a certain amount of group support messages or 1:1 messages. Those are fine goals to have, but we mostly want to create a system of support where people care for one another and then the natural result is an increased number of messages. Or, zooming back, think about this leadership development program. We could have an arbitrary goal of training a certain number of new leaders to serve our community; or we can co-create a system - this leadership development program - that helps people become leaders. The natural consequence of the program will be a higher number of trained, competent, and strong leaders that can better support our community. Â
What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed? What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?
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@GlenM
I say thank you for this useful entry.
11 I try to help to do something about the domestic violence concerned eating for the victims. It occurred a few times that I gave up this fight almost, dared mainly my family mistreating me I received many attacks.
This is very important to make realise in myself, how I started this whole one why. Was important it in reason to keep, what my aim. Strong perseverance and will necessary to go along this heavy road. It was necessary to make myself realize it, that I am able to carry out my aim. I have to believe in myself and I have to believe in my aim.
The fruit of my 11 year works, which I does as you till now, starts turning up now. We created a foundation recently for the maltreated children and now we are waiting for the court registering that association, what will deal with victim protection is what we created.
@Mankka
I really wish all the best to your organisation 
@sunflower2480
thank you
I think a key system for me would be to write up a schedule and stop my procrastination!
I think 3 behaviours (sort of) I could implement are things like determination to ensure that I do my best and don't procrastinate, mental strength to ensure I don't fall back into a pattern of procrastination - and almost certainly my own want to be the best I can possibly be.
That sounds great I'm sure you'll get to your new system🌷
@GlenM
A goal I want to accomplish is maintaining a balance between my work, academics, and personal life. A system I can develop to accomplish this is utilizing my time in such a manner that allows me to spend an hour working out and practicing art every day. I can also maintain a night routine which would truly help me relax after a productive day.
I'm actually in a system of eating healthier
1) I portion my meals now
2) i have something green with every meal
3) I have tried to cut out processed sugar or at least reduced it
@EvelyneRose This sounds great Evelyne! I'm sure that you'll do great. Healthy living is important for general well-being and I consider incorporating healthy eating habits as well!
You will do it🌷
@GlenM
In my opinion the argument of systems being better than goals is undeniable. They appear more effective in achieving a desired state of contentment. From what I understood in the articles and videos, long-term goals are by themselves rigid and static, in which they don't take into account the Human Process of Change, which is an unavoidable part of living. A long-term goal could be seen as something temporary and unnatural from our day to day life. Looking at it from a psychological perspective, I believe it could discourage our mind to engage in the goal-directed behaviour over time. Subconsciously, it becomes negatively charged.
A system on the other hand would be adaptable to change on our journey of life. In fact, I believe that a system is the journey itself. Maybe it could be compared to a hobby. From what I have learnt, a system is the journey to a destination, with the general expectation of improving, in contrast to goals.
What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?
Ironically, by reading about this, I realized I already have a system. A key part of my system is contributing to 7 Cups. Here I was able learn more about mental health conditions and support people experiencing them. That, and develop invaluable personal and professional skills. As Psychology is a hobby passion that I pursue, along with my education in Computer-mediated Communication and ICT, 7 Cups was an obvious choice for me.
What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?
First of all it is embracing the philosophical value that "I know that I know nothing". To me that means being open to learning new things. There will forever be something I can learn, whether it be skills, values, beliefs, theories et cetera. Ideally, this opens my mind to new knowledge.
Secondly, Taking the time that I need to comfortably progress in life. Because I learn a bit slower than the average person, I used to feel like I was a failure. I needed time to fully grasp the understanding of concepts. My Math teacher would usually tell me that I had to stop questioning "why" if I ever were to effectively learn math. He said "Math was not made to make sense." But in order for me to understand, I had to know why. Today I know that I need a little extra time. But once I have learnt something, I can apply it in many unique ways.
Third. Having focus to ensure progression. This is a behaviour I am still working on implementing in my life. It is something I have always struggled with, which resulted in low grades at School. Pursuing my passion interests help, but I want to learn to embrace focus more effectively on tasks that are tedious but necessary to life. I may have to compromise though.
@Aleks2
Thank you for sharing this, it has inspired me a lot.Remaining humble, going at our own pace and mantaining focus: those are incredibly good suggestions that may work for so many other systems.
Really glad to see you are now aware of the system you have already had <3
@GlenM
What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?
Mine would pertain to losing weight over a gradual time. I would like to maintain a healthy lifestyle even through the slip ups.
What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?
Continue using Noom and holding myself accountable
Give myself more credit even when I hit a plateau
Be proud of of the fact that I am not giving up and still trying
@shiningDay80
I really appreciate that your system includes gradual change. I think that is key to success. The thing I might point out is that maybe you have a system of how you can give yourself credit for what you have achieved. I don't know you enough to make suggestions, but it might help to have positive reinforcers along the way for you. Good luck with your system and working toward an end goal. You've got this.
@GlenM
This post was very helpful. One thing that I think relates to this idea of systems and behaviors is my confidence, or lack thereof at times. Haha.
What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?
A system I need to set up, or perhaps just work towards more as I've already started, is having confidence in myself and my actions.
What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?
Being proud of who I am.
Lokking back on the past. And planning for how I can grow and help in the future.
Setting up a better way to have consistent self-care and time for myself.
@AstronomySkies
Looking at the past to enlighten and learn from it is great! Sometimes, we can look back and regret some things we have don't and it can cause anxiety for the present and future. I like your approach to using it to benefit you instead of hindering you.
@GlenM
What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?
The key system that i need to set up in my life is to free myself from my fear of becoming "not good enough". I realise since last 2 years, i have been trying to live up to the expectations of people around me. everyone expects so much from me and i feel really disappointed in myself when i do not keep up those expections, which in turn aggravate my mental health.
What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?
1. i need to make choices for myself and do my best in that.
2.i need to learn to motivate myself during a set back
3. realise that other's opinions, thoughts, wishes are just "advices" and not an "obligatory choice". And that life is not a competition. Be at my own pace, one step at a time, those who mind, doesnt matter and those who matter dont mind. :)
@positivePumpkin22
I think this is great. Good for you!
the key system i need to set up in my life is to focus on things and getthem done one by one -the one step at a time thing- cause i've been trying so hard to handel everything at once and become the "ms. who does and knows everything" that i can't ever be (no one can be unless they're super humans i guess??) which made me feel like a failure for not getting many of those thing done properly because of lack of time or ability to focuson each
the 3 behaviors are
1. to make my daily life more orgenized by schedualing the times for doing each activity
2. fully understanding that to be an accepted personality i don't need to be perfect
3. to shut down any project that i'm involved in which i'm not passionate about (doing it just to please sb or myself) OR don't have the enough time quite yet
@GlenM
What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?
the system himself is needed first my life. I have to learn a lot and commitment and humility necessary.
What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?
1. system
2. learning
3. teamwork