PL 101: Systems vs. Goals (Discussion 4)

@GlenM I think a system that I could implement in my life is figuring out my career. Currently, I want to become a genetic counselor and my thought process is that I have to checkmark all these requirements. Which is true, but I want to try and enjoy the journey and just take it as it comes. It's stressful because applications are coming up, but I try to remember that it will all work out! I think I can try to implement this system by taking time for myself during school/studying, setting smalls goals to make sure everything is organized and remembering that the universe has a plan for me and that I will end up where I am supposed to be!

@GlenM

I would really need to implement a system to set a regular schedule on when I will be on 7 Cups and how I would be using his time.

1. I would need to figure out a schedule that can be combined with my work

2. I would need to write down all the activities that I am/want to do on 7 Cups and implement this.

3. I would need to plan a self-care breaks

3. So basically I would need to be more organized and consistent on daily basis

@GlenM

I say thank you for this useful entry.
11 I try to help to do something about the domestic violence concerned eating for the victims. It occurred a few times that I gave up this fight almost, dared mainly my family mistreating me I received many attacks.
This is very important to make realise in myself, how I started this whole one why. Was important it in reason to keep, what my aim. Strong perseverance and will necessary to go along this heavy road. It was necessary to make myself realize it, that I am able to carry out my aim. I have to believe in myself and I have to believe in my aim.
The fruit of my 11 year works, which I does as you till now, starts turning up now. We created a foundation recently for the maltreated children and now we are waiting for the court registering that association, what will deal with victim protection is what we created.

@Mankka

I really wish all the best to your organisation

@sunflower2480

thank you

I think a key system for me would be to write up a schedule and stop my procrastination!

I think 3 behaviours (sort of) I could implement are things like determination to ensure that I do my best and don't procrastinate, mental strength to ensure I don't fall back into a pattern of procrastination - and almost certainly my own want to be the best I can possibly be.

That sounds great I'm sure you'll get to your new system🌷

@GlenM

A goal I want to accomplish is maintaining a balance between my work, academics, and personal life. A system I can develop to accomplish this is utilizing my time in such a manner that allows me to spend an hour working out and practicing art every day. I can also maintain a night routine which would truly help me relax after a productive day.

I'm actually in a system of eating healthier

1) I portion my meals now

2) i have something green with every meal

3) I have tried to cut out processed sugar or at least reduced it

@EvelyneRose This sounds great Evelyne! I'm sure that you'll do great. Healthy living is important for general well-being and I consider incorporating healthy eating habits as well!

You will do it🌷

@GlenM

In my opinion the argument of systems being better than goals is undeniable. They appear more effective in achieving a desired state of contentment. From what I understood in the articles and videos, long-term goals are by themselves rigid and static, in which they don't take into account the Human Process of Change, which is an unavoidable part of living. A long-term goal could be seen as something temporary and unnatural from our day to day life. Looking at it from a psychological perspective, I believe it could discourage our mind to engage in the goal-directed behaviour over time. Subconsciously, it becomes negatively charged.

A system on the other hand would be adaptable to change on our journey of life. In fact, I believe that a system is the journey itself. Maybe it could be compared to a hobby. From what I have learnt, a system is the journey to a destination, with the general expectation of improving, in contrast to goals.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

Ironically, by reading about this, I realized I already have a system. A key part of my system is contributing to 7 Cups. Here I was able learn more about mental health conditions and support people experiencing them. That, and develop invaluable personal and professional skills. As Psychology is a hobby passion that I pursue, along with my education in Computer-mediated Communication and ICT, 7 Cups was an obvious choice for me.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

First of all it is embracing the philosophical value that "I know that I know nothing". To me that means being open to learning new things. There will forever be something I can learn, whether it be skills, values, beliefs, theories et cetera. Ideally, this opens my mind to new knowledge.

Secondly, Taking the time that I need to comfortably progress in life. Because I learn a bit slower than the average person, I used to feel like I was a failure. I needed time to fully grasp the understanding of concepts. My Math teacher would usually tell me that I had to stop questioning "why" if I ever were to effectively learn math. He said "Math was not made to make sense." But in order for me to understand, I had to know why. Today I know that I need a little extra time. But once I have learnt something, I can apply it in many unique ways.

Third. Having focus to ensure progression. This is a behaviour I am still working on implementing in my life. It is something I have always struggled with, which resulted in low grades at School. Pursuing my passion interests help, but I want to learn to embrace focus more effectively on tasks that are tedious but necessary to life. I may have to compromise though.

@Aleks2

Thank you for sharing this, it has inspired me a lot.Remaining humble, going at our own pace and mantaining focus: those are incredibly good suggestions that may work for so many other systems.

Really glad to see you are now aware of the system you have already had <3

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

Mine would pertain to losing weight over a gradual time. I would like to maintain a healthy lifestyle even through the slip ups.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

Continue using Noom and holding myself accountable

Give myself more credit even when I hit a plateau

Be proud of of the fact that I am not giving up and still trying

@shiningDay80

I really appreciate that your system includes gradual change. I think that is key to success. The thing I might point out is that maybe you have a system of how you can give yourself credit for what you have achieved. I don't know you enough to make suggestions, but it might help to have positive reinforcers along the way for you. Good luck with your system and working toward an end goal. You've got this.

@GlenM

This post was very helpful. One thing that I think relates to this idea of systems and behaviors is my confidence, or lack thereof at times. Haha.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

A system I need to set up, or perhaps just work towards more as I've already started, is having confidence in myself and my actions.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

Being proud of who I am.

Lokking back on the past. And planning for how I can grow and help in the future.

Setting up a better way to have consistent self-care and time for myself.

@AstronomySkies

Looking at the past to enlighten and learn from it is great! Sometimes, we can look back and regret some things we have don't and it can cause anxiety for the present and future. I like your approach to using it to benefit you instead of hindering you.

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

The key system that i need to set up in my life is to free myself from my fear of becoming "not good enough". I realise since last 2 years, i have been trying to live up to the expectations of people around me. everyone expects so much from me and i feel really disappointed in myself when i do not keep up those expections, which in turn aggravate my mental health.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. i need to make choices for myself and do my best in that.

2.i need to learn to motivate myself during a set back

3. realise that other's opinions, thoughts, wishes are just "advices" and not an "obligatory choice". And that life is not a competition. Be at my own pace, one step at a time, those who mind, doesnt matter and those who matter dont mind. :)

@positivePumpkin22

I think this is great. Good for you!

the key system i need to set up in my life is to focus on things and getthem done one by one -the one step at a time thing- cause i've been trying so hard to handel everything at once and become the "ms. who does and knows everything" that i can't ever be (no one can be unless they're super humans i guess??) which made me feel like a failure for not getting many of those thing done properly because of lack of time or ability to focuson each

the 3 behaviors are

1. to make my daily life more orgenized by schedualing the times for doing each activity

2. fully understanding that to be an accepted personality i don't need to be perfect

3. to shut down any project that i'm involved in which i'm not passionate about (doing it just to please sb or myself) OR don't have the enough time quite yet

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

the system himself is needed first my life. I have to learn a lot and commitment and humility necessary.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. system
2. learning
3. teamwork

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

A system I need to set up in my life is to work more milestones instead of end goals. I have a lot of projects and goals I am working towards currently, and I want to work for the milestones instead of just the goals (e.x. losing 10 pounds, or finishing the project asap.) I think this could help me put 100% into a project, or whatever I'm working on and really ensure that I am doing all I can to make it the best.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. Try to write out all the milestones I need to be able to work my hardest on the project. I think that by only seeing the goal of, I want this, I miss the satisfaction when I can't immediatley achive that "I completed something" rush again. So I think by physically looking at milestones (e.x. losing five pounds, and celebrating that I did something) and seeing them could help instead of just that daunting end goal.

2. Organize my brain a little, or make myself think differently. By that I mean try training my brain to do one thing to help me achieve something everyday. Like if I am working on a 7 cups project, it may be a good idea to write down it's progess, this way (like I said above) I am thinking more about the project, not just I want to finish it.

3. Declutter my physical life. I believe that a organized space can lead to me being really productive. I could weekly clean my room (something I am bad at) so that way, when I am 7 cups, or etc, I can feel more productive knowing everything around me is clean and organized. Hopefully, it can help keep me from being distracted.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

Mine would be working on improving my mental health, be more focused on important things and reduce distractions, learn more and challenge myself more.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

Have a more positive outlook on life, rather than being all negative all the time. I'm kinda a realist

Try to procrastinate less, it reduces my progress, I procrastinate a lot and would love to reduce it at a very high rate

Be proud of my achievements, encourage myself more, and learn from both my successes and my failures, and above all love myself.

@GlenM

I have had a long think about this idea of system v goals and I am finding it hard to put into words what I feel about it. I am in two minds.

Goals to me are important, especially long term goals; they give us aim and purpose, drive and determination. Using a method to get there may be called a system?

This also has implications for 7 Cups as well. We might have goals of having a certain amount of group support messages or 1:1 messages. Those are fine goals to have, but we mostly want to create a system of support where people care for one another and then the natural result is an increased number of messages.

On 7 Cups we do have lots of goals, or quotas and targets, and sometimes they cause the opposite effect that desired. Instead of driving activity up the messages or chats feel forced and unreal and so they lack the care and support of a good working system. This course is good in highlighting things like this so we can all be aware and work together to be better, stronger and more caring.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed? What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

I have a lot of systems in my life. Time management, business management, activity management and each one has evolved over the years from education, training courses and life experience. Your example about diet is a good one. Fad dieting will do no good and rebound weight gain is common but put in place a system of healthy meals, smaller portions and relaxation and selfcare and the new diet becomes part of normal everyday life and the goal is achieved.

Listening - One Step At A Time!

Health

Goal: Six Packs
I had a goal of having six-pack abs and did achieve it in the end. To do that, I had to sacrifice a lot. All that hard work and sacrifice went down the drain after 2 months of inactivity.

System: Balanced living
Instead of having 6 packs for a short term, it's more practical to have a 4-pack for a long term. It takes tweaks in nutrition and just enough physical activity. That's a system that can be stuck to

It will take a little of analytical skills, self control and preparation to complete it.

@GlenM

This a nice one as always!

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

> Be able to manage time better with everything going on in my life without feeling overwhelmed

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

> Making a flexible schedule that is practical.

> Being more aware of burning out and taking things slow

> Work on my self confidence

@GlenM

I have many systems I need to put in place but the most important one right now is studying for my exams (I haven't studied since March 😅)

I can get there by:

- Creating a to-do list and allocating time to study (preferably 4 hours)

- Ridding myself of all distractions by putting my phone on DND mode and not going on Youtube 10 mins before study time

- Creating a study timetable so I know what I'm studying each day

- And by actually studying XD

~ Lex ☀️ | Take careo and eat oreos 👋🏿❤️🍪

This was very informative and something I have been struggling with all my life. The Goal and System can seem very similar and often we are told that long term goals is a sure shot at success and we often run behind the idea with the goal in mind but little often work towards in achieving them. The example of loosing weight is very apt of it.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

Ive always been setting goals be it career or with fitness. So I need to make certain changes or actions to ensure i achieve those goals such as lifestyle changes, reading/ learning more. Ensure that I implement those into my daily life activities so that it doesn't feel mundane tasks.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

Stopping procrastination

Stop chasing after the goal and to work towards it

Take things as life lessons both good and bad. So that i grow with each experience in life.

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

The key system that i need to set in my life to help me succeed is to to learn how to say no. i have always struggled with this and sometimes had to suffer as a result of this.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. Never put myself in a situation that will make my growth into this new system difficult for me

2. Learn to be firm with with whatever i decide on doing.

3. Being straightforward with any decision that i make.

A system that am currently working on is validating the person feels and making them feel less alone when there going through a breakup. With this the 3 goals I could set up to help with this being more patience, more validating of the feelings, but also to step back and understand what there going through in there life.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

A key system that I need to set up in my life to succeed is to - set aside time to just read more books.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

The key behaviours to implement this new system would be:-

1) Set a certain time and routine to read books.

2) Have a reward system for myself when I reach my reading goals.

3) Join a book club.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed? What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

A goal of mine is to make decisions. I'm not a decisive person at all, and it's proven difficult for me in the workplace and at school. I suppose the system would be to make decisions when needed and don't worry about how others will react. (I think? If anyone has a better one, please post below!)

three behaviors would be to:

- stop shying away from decisions

-know and understand what I want when it comes to the decision

-taking other people's thoughts and feelings into consideration but doing the best thing overall and not feeling bad about it.

@GlenM

Before I respond to the questions, I thought I would offer my opinion on systems and goals itself. Systems are definitely beneficial in the sense that it is more gradual, one would not lose a sense of purpose after the goal is accomplished, and it may also seem easier to accomplish and get in a habit of. However, for me, I do believe that goals are more effective mainly because if I don't have a clear goal, I'll feel kind of lost, and it's also that feeling of accomplishment once we finish the goal. The best solution I would say is to have both at the same time, or even multiple goals at the same time. We can have long term goals, and even multiple ones that overlap as well :) This is what works for me, but it's definitely different for everyone!!

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

As I mentioned above, I do prefer setting goals instead. However, a key system I would like to set up that goals never worked out for me is exercising. I feel like the main issue that goals never helped was that I never feel motivated enough to exercise, especially to wake up early to exercise (to say the least, I am a very not morning person).

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

One behavior I would want to implement is to force myself to get up early perhaps half an hour early every two days until I start waking up more naturally. I would most likely start off with getting out of my chair to go walk my dog more often as well. hmm, there's actually one behavior so far that really got me to exercise more was when I couldn't eat dinner (house rules) until I run 2 miles ahaha, which honestly really got me moving :) I would still like to exercise more though

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

Having a system to set my priorities straight! There's something called the prioritization matrix that helps a lot with this!

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

1. Have a planner to see important dates and tasks.

2. Prioritize based on this prioritization matrix.

3. Have a specific self-care time for myself.

@GlenM

a system i need to set up in my life is to stop being angry and jealous all the time because it's destroying my relationships with people. and 3 things i can do to improve with this system is:

1. to get help by a professional

2. to control my emotions

3. to write my emotions down on a notebook

@GlenM

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

I need to set up a system for myself to read and study more and become more responsible and organized for work.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

I need to be learn to be more focused. Sometimes I get so distracted I don't complete what I need to do.

I need to work on my social and speaking skills. I sometimes have trouble starting conversations, and I hope to improve on that so I can lead a more fulfilling life.

I also need to learn to be more organized. I'm so messy sometimes that I can't figure out where I put my stuff.

I'm sure I'll be able to work on these!

@ GlenM,

Thanks for sharing this on system building.

What is a key system that you need to set up in your life to help you succeed?

I discover that system is the habit of doing something continuously either convenient or not in order to sustain a steady output of excellent products.
I think I need to set up system in my relationships, career and finance.

What are 3 behaviors you can implement to help you gradually grow that new system in your life?

First, engaging in paid or volunteer work in the area of my passion and profession to attain outstanding competence

Second, daily reading of journals, books and articles on my area of interest. This also include subscribing to Google alerts on topic of my interest.

Third, determine to take risk or step out of my comfort zone at least once a week by trying new things regularly.

Edit - I participated in this. I think because I just went into shock mode and followed the instructions.

I refused to support Scott Adams and have therefore removed my answers to this discussion.

I am considering withdrawing from the LDP over this.

I do want to go on record that I'm pretty horrified leadership development at 7cups would link to anything Scott Adams does. Shouldn't we at least get a trigger warning for this?

My husband stopped reading DIlbert a long time ago because he felt like it was inappopriate to support him in any way.

I expect more from 7 Cups.