Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #9) Passive-Aggressive Communication
Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory. 
Healthy communication is key!
Questions:
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!
After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.
This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.
@Heather225
Forms of passive aggressive communication
1. The silent treatment: When a person stops talking to you to let you know there is still a problem.
2. The subtle insult: Causes confusion and underminds your/their confidence
3. Procratinating on purpose: They are showing that they are in control of the schedule and that you have no control over them
4. Sabotage: Deliberatly mess something up
5. Keeping score: Keeping track of favors and good deeds
My mother is very passive agressive and uses most of these tactics on my whole family
Passive agression fosters an enviroment of resentment and hurt feelings
@goldenFriend9335
I am sorry to hear your mother uses these tactics, I hope you are okay
@goldenFriend9335
I'm really sorry to hear that your mother uses those tactics
I really hope things get better for you
@goldenFriend9335 i liked this answer!
@goldenFriend9335
I really agree about the fact that you pointed out: passive agression hurts feelings and causes resentment. Thanks for the honest post.
@goldenFriend9335
Loved your brief but inclusive response!
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
The silent treatment - Someone stops speaking to you to show there is still a problem
Suttle insults - Confusing people and undermining their confidence
Procrastinating on purpose - Showing someone else is in control of the schedule and you have no control
Sabotage - Deliberately messing something up for someone else
Keeping score - Someone who keeps track of all of the favours that they have done for you
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
My brothers like to keep score a bit. This is however luckily not too bad as they always forget about it after a while.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
Because it can cause negitive feelings towards others which will make them feel bad and could start the spiral of decline for some people.
@considerateParadise6717
You described each one in a very good way
@considerateParadise6717 Wow, those detailed descriptions about each sign! Yes, they does help to understand it better to what I really strive.
@considerateParadise6717 good answer!
@Heather225
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastinating on purpose
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping score
I used to used silent treatment and procrastinating on purpose and eventually learned that instead of doing all those things that might make the other person puzzled and move us further apart from each other, I think now that honesty is way better. We need to listen to each other and speak what we think in a good and clear way to avoid more conflicts and punishing people that way
I think passive aggressive behavior is very toxic here because it's a form of dishonesty that will indeed mess up our communication and trust which are the building blocks of our community, we need to be clear about our feelings and dislikes in others behavior or way of work or treatment by giving them an honest feedback
@generousBreeze169 It sounds great that you learnt how to treat silent treatment and procrastination, I appreciate your experience! And I aggree about dishonesty and trust destruction by passive agression.
@windSpirit great answer
@generousBreeze169 nice!
@generousBreeze169
Great answer!
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. The silent treatment
2. Subtle insults
3. Procrastinating on purpose
4. Sabotage (deliberately messing something up)
5. Keeping score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I have experienced silent treatments before.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It is extremely damaging because it creates a hostile environment. In that type of environment, trust is not present at all.
@competentParadise6344 Yeah, trust is most important here and supporting environment would not be such unless we support each other by being clear, honest and straightforward.
@Jili
I agree, good job
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. Silent treatment (punishing by silence)
2. Subtle insults (words which causing misunderstanding and thoughts "what I did wrong")
3. Procrastinating on purpose (delaying promises)
4. Sabotage (to harm on purpose "accindentaly")
5. Keeping score (remembering all good things done and make others owe for that)
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I had several persons used silent treatment on me. Probably, they are just watched how I do write to them continiously to make me suffer and feel frustrated too.
I also did on purpose #1 and #3. #1 because I felt I must make them understand how I feel and how did they damage me. #3 because I felt hopeless myself and unable to help them, so they by it would be helping me and caring about me. Neither of these variants work well and I understand that #1 does not make them understanding me and #3 would not make them caring about me. It just makes it all worse.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It causes misunderstangdings, miscommunications and destroys trust and supportive atmosphere. It makes people being not understanding, sad, raging, hopeless, controlled, harmed and obliged, and is icreasing their suffer.
@windSpirit
You explained each sign so nicely!
I like how honest you're about using these sometime too and agreeing with the fact that, engaging in such behaviour makes things worse ..
Agreed definitely, we need a community based on trust and mutual appreciation and good communication ❤
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
The Silent Treatment
Keeping Score
Sabotage
Procastrinating on purpose.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
Keeping Score
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It betrays trust and could damage friendships because of its high toxicity and aggression
@kieran000
Oops, + Subtle Insults
@kieran000
Score keeping and subtle insults are so difficult to experience:(
I agree too , passive aggressive behaviour creates a toxic space around and we really don't need that in our happy and supportive community 😊❤
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
1. Silent treatment,
2. Subtle insults
3. Intentional Procrastination
4. Sabotage
5. Keeping Score
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
An old friend of mine tends to be passive-aggressive, which led to mutual mistrust and the eventual breakdown of friendship. There was usually silent treatment and subtle insults.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community? Passive-aggressive behavior can become toxic
Passive-aggressive behavior can become quite toxic, leading to an unhealthy environment and. It is damaging for the community because honesty and clear communication are vital elements of the 7 Cups culture.
@gigantCloud92
I am sorry you've experienced passive aggressive behavior from a friend, it's hurtful to say the least:(
Agreed too, clear communication is so important for the community to work efficiently 😊
@Sunisshiningandsoareyou
Thank you. And I'm glad you agree :)
@gigantCloud92
I'm sorry that you've experienced this from a friend, this can certainly hurt relationships in the long run...
@Heather225
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
Silent treatment , Subtle Insults , Procrastinating on Purpose , Sabotage and Score keeping.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I've experienced Silent Treatment and subtle Insults as a passive aggressive behaviour from some people .
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
I don't think any kind of aggression is nice but specifically speaking about passive aggression, it's all the more detrimental because the other person doesn't even know if they did something wrong or have hurt anyone unintentionally. It's damaging to the community because, passive aggressive behaviour can create a hostile and toxic environment , while our community stands for helping and supporting people , it is very much opposite to the values we believe in , if someone is being passive aggressive , especially when a leader does that, it's hurtful and discouraging, making people less trusting and non reliable , and can affect the community negatively , causing emotional distress and unhealthy atmosphere.
@Sunisshiningandsoareyou
I agree with you, passive agressive can create very toxic environment and especially leader should not have passive agressive behaviours.
@Sunisshiningandsoareyou I agree with you about how detrimental passive aggression can be in a community like this.
@kindLemonade , @MarleyR , thankyou for responding , I am glad yall agree too .
Best wishes for your LDP journey ❤
@Heather225 The five signs of passive-aggressive communication are Silent Treatment, Subtle Insults, Procrastinating on Purpose, Sabotage, and Keeping Score.
An experience I’ve had with passive-aggressive communication was from a childhood friend who always kept score, it felt super unhealthy and divided us as we got older.
Passive Aggression is damaging to our community because it creates a negative, toxic environment.
What are the 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication?
The 5 signs of passive-aggressive communication is: Silent treatment, subtle insults, intentionally procrastinating, sabotage and keeping score.
What is one example of passive-aggressive behavior you have experienced in your life?
I have experienced the silent treatment when I was only little. It makes you feel unheard of. I didn't understand the concept of passive-aggressive behavior but as I have grown up, I have now a better understanding.
Why is passive aggression so damaging to our community?
It's damaging to our community because it divides us. It makes people feel isolated, upset and unheard of. This can make the person not talk to anyone else in fear of this happening again to them. People don't really understand how damaging words can be, especially for the younger ones as well.
@Rhlexia520
I agree, I am here if you need!
Good Job!