Course 2, Discussion 4: The problem is the path
Hello LDP Team!
The problem is the path is the core insight that helps us evolve as individuals and as a community here on 7 Cups.
Here is an overview of this course:
Course Description: It is natural for us to want to avoid problems. Problems can cause worry, anxiety, and frustration. These are feelings that we often want to avoid. Problems, however, are the key to growth. When we face our problems directly we get smarter and grow stronger. A saying that captures this is: Progress = Pain + Reflection. This course helps you learn the value of problems by highlighting the difference between problems you might be concerned about and problems you can directly solve. Next, it walks you through the ancient practice of steering into problems directly in order to unlock their value and gifts. Finally, it helps you identify and measure progress so you can make continued gains in your personal and professional life.
✒️ Watch the following video and identify 3 things in your circle of concern, 3 things in your circle of influence, and 1 thing you can do to remind yourself to focus on your circle of influence.
✒️ Next, watch the following video and highlight what stands out to you about this executive? What did they do that would be considered proactive as opposed to reactive?
Further Reading (Optional but recommended):
This idea of problem is the path is a reoccurring theme in self help books and especially stoicism. If you are interested in learning more about this thought process, we recommend the following books:
The obstacle is the way by Ryan Holiday
A Guide to the Good Life: The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy, by William Braxton Irvine
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@FrenchToast
1. Circle of Concern, Circle of Influence, and a Reminder
Three things in my circle of concern:
- How others perceive me in social settings.
- The outcomes of situations beyond my control (e.g., traffic or weather).
- The actions and attitudes of people around me.
Three things in my circle of influence:
- How I choose to respond to others.
- My daily habits, like practicing gratitude and journaling.
- The effort I put into understanding and connecting with others.
One thing to remind myself to focus on my circle of influence:
I keep a small note with the phrase, "The things you think about determine the quality of your mind. Your soul takes on the color of your thoughts.," as a daily reminder that I have power over my actions, responses, and mindset, even if I can't control the world around me.
2. Insights About the Executive's Proactive Approach
What stood out to me was how this executive didn't waste energy on what they couldn't change about their boss. Instead of reacting with frustration or criticism, they chose to understand their boss's strengths and weaknesses, empathizing with the pressure he faced. By anticipating needs, compensating for his weaknesses, and aligning with his vision, this executive demonstrated true leadership.
I like your insights about the executive! I also felt it was key that he didn't spend his time negatively talking about the president and instead focused his skills on supporting the team. Thanks for sharing!
@FrenchToast
✒️ Watch the following video and identify 3 things in your circle of concern, 3 things in your circle of influence, and 1 thing you can do to remind yourself to focus on your circle of influence.
3 things in my circle of concern others' feelings and reactions; new crises and problems, the previous system
3 things in your circle of influence setting goals; build an effective system, resolve problems
✒️ Next, watch the following video and highlight what stands out to you about this executive? What did they do that would be considered proactive as opposed to reactive?
to be proactive need to have vision and informations to give you some space for prediction and setting steps to grow or fix problems .
✒️ Watch
the following video and identify 3 things in your circle of concern, 3
things in your circle of influence, and 1 thing you can do to remind
yourself to focus on your circle of influence.
Three things in my circle of concern are what people say about me, natural disasters occurring, and policies in place at my institution. Three things in my circle of influence are my well-being/rest, my time management, and how I speak to/interact with people. I can remind myself to focus on my circle of influence by telling myself to focus on what's in my domain and what I can control, especially if I'm feeling powerless or out of control.
✒️ Next,
watch the following video and highlight what stands out to you about
this executive? What did they do that would be considered proactive as
opposed to reactive?
The executive was proactive in understanding his work environment and adapting his skills to best support the team as a whole. He was flexible yet also personable, allowing trust and connections to be built between him and everyone on the team, which really stood out to me.
@WillingToHelpU I love how you explained the executive's manner of being proactive and how he influenced the issue by building trust with his colleagues
@FrenchToast
✒️ Watch the following video and identify 3 things in your circle of concern, 3 things in your circle of influence, and 1 thing you can do to remind yourself to focus on your circle of influence.
Three things in my circle of concern are:
1. The future
2. Other people's perceptions
3. The state of the world (war, poverty, crime, etc)
Three things in my circle of influence are:
1. The efforts I put into being present such as mindfulness, meditation and gratitude
2. My mindset
3. Practicing empathy and compassion
One thing I can do to remind myself to focus on my circle of influence is to engage in daily affirmations, such as "I choose to focus on the things I can control and let go of the things I cannot," or "I channel my energy towards my goals with focus and intention."
✒️ Next, watch the following video and highlight what stands out to you about this executive? What did they do that would be considered proactive as opposed to reactive?
What stood out to me about the executive was that he took a proactive approach by empathizing with the president and anticipating his needs, rather than being reactive and criticizing or gossiping about him. In adopting such a proactive approach, the executive was able to work with the president's strengths and vision, consequently allowing him to develop a complementary relationship. Based on the presented scenario, it is evident that when one focuses on their circle of influence, it not only expands but leads to many positive outcomes for all.
@hopefulDew435 I can relate to your Circle of Concern, when things seem out of control and more importantly out of our control it is natural to feel unsettled.
@hopefulDew435
I appreciate you sharing your insights. I thought you summarized the executive's actions very succinctly. It's important to figure out how to turn a negative situation into a positive one and the video deals with that subject.
Best wishes on your journey!
Circle of concern:
lack of funding
workload
staff not being replaced
circle of infuence:
work hard
stay positive
stop complaining
Try to remember to not worry about things out of my control.
He tried to improve things positively instead of complaining behind the boss’s back.
Three things in my Circle of Concern would be worrying about my adult children who live a distance away, worrying about the outcome of our upcoming election, working with an employee who complains alot.
Three things in my Circle of Influence would be being maintaining open communication and try not to overreact when talking with my children, vote in the upcoming election, try to respond the the complaining employee with empathy and understanding.
The executive in the video was amazingly patient and persistent with clear goal to be able to work successfully with his boss. By doing that he also influenced the other employees around him.
✒️ Watch the following video and identify 3 things in your circle of concern, 3 things in your circle of influence, and 1 thing you can do to remind yourself to focus on your circle of influence.
Circle of concern: What other people are doing with their time, a person who is being rude to me, what people say about me.
Circle of influence: Time management, attitude, boundaries. One way to remind myself of being proactive is by incorporating it into my meditations.
✒️ Next, watch the following video and highlight what stands out to you about this executive? What did they do that would be considered proactive as opposed to reactive?
The executive read the situation and made the decision to work around the president's leadership style in order to complement it.
@FrenchToast
3 things in my circle of influence
Focus on my own actions and attitudes.
Develop skills and knowledge to improve areas l can control.
Avoid wasting energy on blame, complaints, or other uncontrollable factors.
3 things in my circle of concern
Educating myself
Personal reflection
Be Solution-Oriented:
@FrenchToast
Watch the following video and identify 3 things in your circle of concern, 3 things in your circle of influence, and 1 thing you can do to remind yourself to focus on your circle of influence.
Circle of concern
1. People judging me- I've noticed that i have a tendency to worry about others judging me even when they are only strangers.
2. People bad mouthing me- I have faced this before from my previous friend groups.
3. Losing friends- I'm scared of losing friends after im done with school or even right now due to busy schedules, exams and many not attending school altogether, to study at home.
Circle of influence
1. Being kind and not criticizing someone in a situation where they are absent as that would lead to the strain of current relationships.
2. Appreciating people around me
3. Time management
I will remind myself that it's better to start influencing the small factors in life, such as making time for friends, appreciating everyone for being present in my life, rather than focusing on the factors i cannot quite influence yet. Because the small factors i influence now will soon pave the path to influence big factors like people generally having a good opinion about me and becoming a good leader.
Next, watch the following video and highlight what stands out to you about this executive? What did they do that would be considered proactive as opposed to reactive?
Although many in that business setting criticized the boss for being dictatorial yet gave no criticism to him directly, this can be considered a reactive approach. They all were frustrated by the boss's method of leading the team yet took no measure to affect that situation in a positive manner.
However, one executive took the initiative to think empathetically of the boss, his need to take the business to a better place and balanced the weaknesses of the boss. When the president didn't quit listen to others' opinions, this man decided to build relationships with his colleagues, collect everyone's ideas and present them all together providing an analysis. This was a proactive way of reacting to an issue since he did not become overly frustrated, neither did he criticize the president, the executive understood him and started building relationships with those around him. After building interpersonal relationships with his colleagues, he affected the bigger problem which was his boss's dictatorial leadership style by becoming an important person himself. The president began to respect him for his competence and how he balanced out his weaknesses, hence could be considered a proactive method of reacting to a problem compared to others of the same organization
I loved reading your reflections! You’ve done a wonderful job identifying your circles of concern and influence, and your insights are both honest and inspiring.
Your concern about being judged or losing friends is something many of us relate to—it takes courage to share that vulnerability. What’s even more amazing is how you’ve chosen to focus on things you can influence, like being kind, appreciating others, and managing your time well. Those small but significant actions truly have the power to transform relationships and build a strong, positive presence in people’s lives.
I also loved your reminder about starting small to pave the way for bigger changes. It’s such a great perspective—every little step you take toward kindness and gratitude is a building block for becoming the kind of leader and friend you want to be.
Your analysis of the executive's proactive approach is spot on, too. The way they combined empathy with action is such an inspiring reminder that leadership often comes from creating connections and working collaboratively.
Keep going—you’re putting a lot of thought into this process, and I know you’re on the path to something impactful. 💛
Let me know if you ever want to chat more about this or just need someone to brainstorm ideas with :)
Circle of Concern and Circle of Influence
1. Circle of Concern:
- The mental health struggles of people I support as a 7 Cups Listener.
- The overall stigma surrounding mental health in society.
- Global issues like systemic inequality and poverty.
2. Circle of Influence:
- How I respond to members on 7 Cups—showing kindness and empathy.
- My growth, like learning to manage stress and anxiety better.
- Encouraging small, positive steps in the lives of people I interact with.
3. One thing to focus on my circle of influence:
- I’ll put a note on my desk that says, “Impact what’s in front of you. You can’t do it all, but you can do something.”
What stood out to me about the executive was their ability to stay calm and focused when problems arose. Instead of reacting emotionally or blaming others, they sought actionable solutions and rallied their team around a shared goal. This approach showed me the power of being proactive—thinking ahead and staying solution-focused, even in stressful situations.
For example, they didn’t wait for the problem to get worse but tackled it directly by communicating clearly and making a plan. That proactive mindset is something I want to practice more, both in my personal and professional life.