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Course 2, Discussion 3: High Expectations and High Warmth

FrenchToast December 5th, 2022

Congrats! You made it the second course in the LDP! In this course, we focus on the specific interpersonal skills needed to be a strong leader on 7 Cups, including mastery of communication skills, time management, conflict resolution, stress management and empowering new leaders.

I know if you are here, you have read our values and culture guide. I would like to start off by further emphasizing one value that's required for a leader to be successful here, and that is balancing High Expectations & High Warmth.

Work environments with high expectations and minimal warmth tend to result in companies that are very driven, rule-oriented and risk-averse. The people do not tend to grow as much personally or professionally. On the other hand, workplaces that are high in warmth, but have minimal expectations, tend to struggle. Everyone is happy and feels loved, but not a lot of effective or focused work gets done.

7 Cups is high expectations AND high warmth. We expect a lot from you. You might feel like we think you are more capable than other people have suggested or maybe even more capable than how you see yourself. That is okay. Every person on the team has outperformed and done better than they expected. This is largely because warmth, patience, and trust help people make much more progress than they have in other environments. We have high expectations, but we will provide plenty of encouragement and guidance to help you get there.

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✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

✒️ Please reply to at least 1 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here!


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zaatarHoney April 13th, 2023

@FrenchToastClub


✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

Either nothing is getting done or nothing is getting done for ‘very long’, lol. High expectation and High warmth is considered Authoritative. Whereas, high expectation and low warmth is considered Authoritarian. High warmth and low expectation is considered permissive. Low warmth and low expectation is considered negligent.

Expectations set the scene. Without expectations, you put the burden on your team to figure out independently and the results will lack consistency, if there is much result at all. Results are crucial for teams to see that what they’re doing is making a difference. It allows for others to avoiding having to second guess or over-think, potentially burning out or losing interest, and ultimately it allows for specific and relevant criteria to be known and met for specific goals to be met in specific time frames.

It’s important to be warm because your team deserves to feel appreciated and seen, and if you have a genuine connection that you intentionally nurture with your team— it shows in the results. In last chapter, the woman in the Lead by Example video, discussed how it’s important to go to bat for your team. With genuine warmth as a known presence within your team, you are more naturally inclined to advocate and support each of your team members. Without warmth, it’s only a matter of time before your team’s morale falls apart— even the greatest, strongest team member would suffer the effects.

And, I believe personally that in order to create a sense of shared purpose within your team, you need both equally— warmth and expectation.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work w0ith your fellow leaders?

Is there a way to “^ ^ ^” professionally? (Lol) Just kidding. I digress, now, “as per my previous response…” 🤭

✒️ Please reply to at least 1 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

Roger that.

Rubylistens22 April 18th, 2023

@FrenchToastClub

What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

No one wants to work with someone who has little warmth, but if my expectations are too low, our productivity would go way down. but if my expectations were too high, people might feel discouraged and therefore our productivity and morale would go down either way.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

1. The community definitely won’t benefit from either, because without expectations or warmth, there’s no growth. And without growth, we’re not going anywhere… and that’s not optimal😅

2. Our team mentality would most likely go down, and we won’t be as great as we could be

1 reply
April 25th, 2023

@Rubylistens22

I agree, low warmth and low expectations would definitely harm the community and hold us back.


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April 25th, 2023

@FrenchToastClub

✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

As a 7Cups leader, I think an imbalance of expectations and warmth will result in lower quality of work being done overall, as well as relationships between others in the community, both members and listeners will suffer.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

Low expectations and high warmth

  • Community progress is going to be slow and inefficient as it’s easy to slack off when expectations are low. This means behaviors that drain both our personal and collective gas tanks such as being distracted, making excuses, and avoiding problems will be much more widespread and problematic.
  • When expectations are minimal, it would be easy for any leader including myself to not take things seriously. As a result of this, the overall quality of work being done is poor.

Low warmth and high expectations

  • Low warmth and high expectations create an environment in which people are under pressure to perform but have little to no motivation to do the work. This results in people finding work unfulfilling and prone to burnout.
  • When there’s low warmth, there’s a lack of friendliness and trust in the environment. This would impact my relationship with fellow leaders and community members because we won’t be able to collaborate on tasks without trust.

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1 reply
broadfemmelovelive April 27th, 2023

@richuyulin

"which people are under pressure to perform but have little to no motivation to do the work"

I love this statement you made. I feel like pressure can also translate to demand which for some like me is something that then turns quickly to avoidance. Great response :)

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broadfemmelovelive April 27th, 2023

@FrenchToastClub

Balancing expectations and warmth is vital to effectively support those who need it. If, as a 7 Cups leader, you have an imbalance of expectations and warmth, it could lead to a negative experience for you and the person you are trying to help. If you have too many expectations and need more warmth, it could come across as cold and uncaring, defeating the purpose of being a leader on 7 Cups. On the other hand, too much warmth and not enough expectations could lead to a lack of structure and ineffective support. Remember to approach each situation with empathy and understanding while setting clear expectations for progress and growth.

Having too low of expectations or too little warmth can hurt the community. People tend to thrive in environments where they are encouraged and supported rather than constantly criticized or ignored. When expectations are set too low, individuals may not feel motivated to push themselves to their full potential, and the community may suffer as a result. Additionally, when there is a lack of warmth and understanding, individuals may feel isolated and unsupported, leading to decreased productivity and morale. As a leader, it is essential to maintain a positive and supportive environment where individuals feel valued and encouraged to grow. By setting high expectations and providing warmth and understanding, leaders can help foster a strong and thriving community where individuals feel empowered to excel and achieve their goals.

1 reply
MagnificentSunrise May 19th, 2023

@broadfemmelovelive, I like your discussion. I think you are spot on! 😊

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Smrtbibliophile May 12th, 2023

✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

I think if I have an imbalance of expectation and warmth due to expectations being high and war,th being low, I will likely see a lot of turn over and team members who burn out because I will be expecting a lot but not giving enough to motivate or inspire. If I have an imbalance because my expectations are low but the warmth is high, I'm likely to see a lot of happy team members but work not getting done or not getting done correctly.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

I think when you have too much warmth and not enough expectation at first the community and leaders may seem happy - but I imagine they will quickly get frustrated that things they need aren't getting done in a timely manner. However, on the flip side too high of expectations and not enough warmth will probably make it seem like I or my team is not being understading or helpful or taking their needs into consideration and I see other leaders getting frustrated and not wanting to work with my team.

1 reply
jadenrjc7 May 16th, 2023

@Smrtbibliophile I love this!

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jadenrjc7 May 16th, 2023

@FrenchToastClub

✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

Possibly burnout and a feeling of loss or emptiness.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

1. You might not be as helpful to the community due to burnout.

2. You may not be as respectful to other peers.

1 reply
GermanZebraCupcake May 22nd, 2023

@jadenrjc7

Yes! It's so important we avoid burnout for ourselves or for others - I love that you made a point to mention that.

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MagnificentSunrise May 19th, 2023

What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

Imbalances are obviously bad. If you demand a lot from people you need to be warm and supportive to help them along and grow into their role. An excess if one of them will lead to less productive work and feel unsatisfying.

How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

I think that too low expectations likely result in low performance and therefore a lack of satisfaction and maybe even people quitting their roles. This impacts the community badly because trainings, safety, rooms, sessions and other parts of Cups would not function as well.

Too little warmth likely results in frustration and disappoinment. It would result in less role retention and lower performance. The impact on the community would probably be very similar.
1 reply
TabbyCat97 June 4th, 2023

@MagnificentSunrise

This is really awesome Sunrise, I love your response and agree :) ♡

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GermanZebraCupcake May 22nd, 2023

@FrenchToastClub

✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

If I have an imbalance of expectations and warmth, the vibe of everything will be off and it just won't function well - for myself, the people under my care, or the org itself.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

If I have High Expectations, Low Warmth in the way I approach people, it will cause very fast rates of burn-out within the organization and increase stress for all involved. If I have Low Expectations, High Warmth then while it's stress-free for those directly under my care, it can cause a ripple effect. People will not do much of anything without guidance and that's not actually the kind thing to do. The members are counting on us, for one, and for two, those directly under our care won't know what they're capable of doing.

Nvlmi May 22nd, 2023

✒️ What do you think happens if you, a 7 Cups leader, have an imbalance of expectations and warmth?

I think if I had an imbalance in expectations and warmth then morale, quality performance, productivity, efficiency and further would also be affected.

✒️ How do you think having too low of expectations, or too little warmth, will impact 1.) the community, and 2.) impact how you work with your fellow leaders?

1) To have too low of expectations and too little of warmth in the community wouldn't uphold a higher purpose or mission and goal objectives. There would be lack of clear directives and accountability. Additionally people might feel disregarded or unsupported in communal projects and more.

2) The impact with fellow leaders might suffer in aspects that were also addressed in 1) additionally resources may not be shared appropriately in order to create better outcomes and solutions overall


1 reply
MaggieListens00 June 13th, 2023

@Nvlmi

Thank you for your insights, I look forward to reading more!

Cynthialy July 2nd

@Nvlmi totally agree!

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SnowTabby May 30th, 2023

@FrenchToastClub
If a 7cups leader has an imbalance of expectations and warmth it can either be detrimental to the environment for listeners which indirectly impacts members comfort reaching out as well as success in listening to those who do feel comfortable with a listener that answers OR it can create an environment that is too warm, too friendly, with no expectations of growth/responsibility or proper culture and etiquette. Either way, the leader provides a harsh environment ill prepared for active listening. There needs to be kindness and realness to create warmth. There needs to be dedication, confidence, and motivation to create expectations. Neither of those can be communicated down the grapevine without a balance.

By chance someone is too warm and creates a harsh environment, it could cause more logical responses, possibly lazy or uncaring responses, as there is no reason for expectations to be met. If someone has too low of expectations, my work with fellow leaders will become too understanding and disrespect would be tolerated.