my space
hmmm, my thread is gone, idk why., did i do something wrong?
shaking, don't really know why. have to get to school, but i can tell i'm on the verge of a breakdown. hhhhh
tw caps
EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE THEY SAID IM "THE BEST" AND I GOT TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM AND HELP HIM OUT AND YEAH WE'RE BOTH DOING SHITTY BUT EEEEEEEEE SDLKJFDKSLFJSLKDJFKLSDJ I GENUINELY FEEL ALRIGHT AND NOT JUST A "IM SOMEBODY ELSE" TYPE OF FEELING
like. i know that this isn't fully me but right now, even if i may not be a good person, i'm not a bad person either. and i'm alright by myself, but also am able to rely on myself and even if the future may be terrible, i'm here right now and this is enough
mmmmmmmm, gotta love never feeling like myself
@ahhhhelpimalive *sits with you* 💙 Dissociating? Have you tried grounding?
@ahhhhelpimalive
Hey alive ❤️ Been a while since seen you around hope you are all well. Yeah just wanted to say that. Sending you lots of love.
:)
@ferventflame
Heyo, Flamsie! Indeed, it's been a while! I hope you're doing alright as well. 💙
Thanks for checking in! I've been taking a small break from Cups, it was taking over my life for a while, so I've been trying to step back and take care of myself. This season is always busy, and my mental health can be kinda ahhhh as well.
How have you been? 💙 Hugs if you want them!
head hurts a little. i'm thinking of rebuilding walls, which i dont really want to do, but it's been tough and i feel like i need to be strong to get through it. it's the only way i know to manage right now. but ill figure things out later, when i can really think and feel. have to deal with family and such right now. it smells like smoke and yet there's no smoke or anything of the sorts around. i hate that i cant trust my own body. wellllll thats my life though, and itll pass. at least i have them <3 i s t i l l haven't explained them, but i will at some point. e has joined and honestly, i'm not surprised, but it's nice.
a l s o both jay and mars are planning to get me a gift and told me how good of a friend i was and y e a h that made me feel really nice <3 i had a gift idea for jay, i just hope i can find the motivation to work on it
kinda want to go back to other favorite people.
feel like i'm faking things, making everything up, just because i think i might have bpd. and i hate that i think that because of course im just making things up and im hurting so many people by doing it and i could just stop it. and yet i can't and i'd give anything to make this hell stop, i need to get out of my head. im so so so tired.
on another note, looking forward to things. but also feel like the gift im making for jay isn't enough and i hate how much i care about him and yet also that's okay, because it's okay to get close to people. i'm just not used to it.
just overwhelmed by things, feeling tired, angry. but it will pass, i will feel better 💙
@ahhhhelpimalive Hey 💙 I think we all have times when we think or feel like we're making things up. Good days make it feel like we're just full of BS but the bad days bring reality with it
Its hard caring about people because what if we get hurt? What if we hurt them?
Personally I think made gifts mean more because it's like you're putting a piece of yourself in it but that's just my opinion
I hope you were able to get some rest 💙
@mytwistedsoul
Thank you so much for your reply 💙
I hope that you're doing well, I'm here for you if you ever want to share
It really can be tough, but things do pass, things will be alright 💙💙💙
@ahhhhelpimalive You've got a pretty good mindset with reminding yourself that things will pass and you'll be allright. I admire you for that 💙
You're awesome 😃
