in the wonders of my mind💗.

_{I thought he’d be absent but whatever. he just came in late.}

_{I had to go pick up a calculator from a girl in my yeargroup-}

_{i have 21 minutes-}

_{I had to go pick up a calculator from a girl in my yeargroup-}

_{i have 21 minutes-}

school internet-

_{I wish I could give guys something else to physically stare at.}

_…..

_{I just don’t get it :’) I don’t understand. I don’t get the difference between me and her- what can I do to be enough..? I’m so genuine at this point. because I’ve gave everyone my everything. and now I’ve apparently "lost that spark to my eye". I’m gone. I can’t go through stuff and be so perfect but when I’m expected to do something I do it-? I try. I just try. I swear I’m so hurt. I swear it hurts. you hurt me. what does it take to see it. you hate seeing others hurt but you hurt me you literally stole who I used to be. I came here so. not gonna say hopeful because I thought this was something for sewerslide but whatever. innocent? people are actually so fake here. it’s insane because when im at school I feel like I just can’t keep my eyes open because of how mentally draining. being surrounded by friends and friend groups everywhere but you’re the only freak. I complimented a couple people today. and I helped some randoms. I like doing it. but now- you just do stuff for how everyone else sees you? literally no one cares. if you want to fit in you can’t just be nice. but that’s why I thought it’d be different here because almost every time someone would go against a rule or be rude/mean/hurtful in any way everyone would get involved. but what actually happens that hurts people isn’t seen. I swear I’m hurt but I don’t get the difference. a hurting girl and a "hurting" girl.? the minute you can’t be anyone’s pawn anymore you don’t even matter. you don’t matter. at 2% I’m gonna go.} 

_{you didn’t bother. you couldn’t bother.}

_{my heart-}

_{at school.}

_{slt are looking for me.}