Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

in the wonders of my mind💗.

iloveyouxx March 17th

hey there :D hm. last time I checked you didn’t look like me🧐makes sense doesn’t it😛since there can only be one *me*✨one of a kind now arent I😁/sar. one out of 8118835999✨🌷can you imagine :0 o right- you can- becoss you’re also one of a kind💖 sorrysorry haha :P🤍im just messing around xD💞also it’s 2am- but shush no snitching🤫I’ll sleep in a while😁when I’m feeling a bit more sane :>😛🩷

wanted to have my own space.💜 for thoughts feelings vents or just anything on my mind.💙

to whoever's coming across :'3💜please dont lurk here.🩷 I know anyone can have access to this forum :')💙but please be respectful🩷.(but honestly..I know someone will either way :P💛 y’all get crazy nosy haha- it’s alright.💛nothing too interesting will be here anyway💛if you would like to come in and be supportive it’s completely okie💛but please don’t make it a regular or "normal" thing if that makes sense. just have a sort of limit💛because I’d still like this to be just my space ^-^💛)

peach-and-goma.gif

3939
iloveyouxx OP June 27th

4am but idk if it matters anymore 

iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I'm just gonna 4am here and if I randomly stop than idk anymore 

iloveyouxx OP June 27th

everyone's so dead asleep and it's still really dark. I wanted to see when the sub would rise today 

1 reply
iloveyouxx OP June 27th
sun* it's so hard to type here
load more
iloveyouxx OP June 27th

today it's meant to rise at 5:32am and it's 4:27am

iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I notice how. others do small things without making it obvious and I always try to adjust myself for that

iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I remember when I was 11 years old I said that anyone who ever said what mattered was our happiness lied because really we live to try and live up be good enough and reach the standards of the judgemental strangers that we'd never see again. and really we just either add onto all that's happening or get insecure and change everything about ourselves making others insecure. 

I disagree with it now I guess. not everyone's the same but it does still affect others. standards and expectations. just not the way I thought it did 

iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I used to be really positively sad :') I'd just say such horrible things and I'd smile sweetly after as if it was all okay 

iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I feel like I'm just hard to care for. 

4 replies
iloveyouxx OP June 27th
and I mean it's okay
3 replies
iloveyouxx OP June 27th
but it can hurt so bad sometimes
2 replies
iloveyouxx OP June 27th

and some people say they care and I know I shouldn't doubt it. but being painfully honest to myself protects me from getting more hurt. and then I still get hurt either way. 

1 reply
iloveyouxx OP June 27th
I can't accept it I can acknowledge it but I can't accept it because I don't want it to be real
load more
load more
load more
load more
iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I make everything worse. I come up with something sad in every situation. I talk about myself way too much. I have nothing to offer. you can't talk to me I'm just not easy to talk to. I'm so insanely dumb it's hard to believe like I thought I was smart due a while and this week I've just been learning so many basic stuff. I feel like anyone would just look at me and think ew. I hate myself so much. 

1 reply
iloveyouxx OP June 27th
I don't even trust myself. 
load more
iloveyouxx OP June 27th

I wanna do it again.