in the wonders of my mindš.
hey there :D hm. last time I checked you didnāt look like meš§makes sense doesnāt itšsince there can only be one *me*āØone of a kind now arent Iš/sar. one out of 8118835999āØš·can you imagine :0 o right- you can- becoss youāre also one of a kindš sorrysorry haha :Pš¤im just messing around xDšalso itās 2am- but shush no snitchingš¤«Iāll sleep in a whilešwhen Iām feeling a bit more sane :>šš©·
wanted to have my own space.š for thoughts feelings vents or just anything on my mind.š
to whoever'sĀ coming acrossĀ :'3šplease dont lurk here.š©· I know anyone can have access to this forumĀ :')šbut please be respectfulš©·.(but honestly..I know someone will either way :Pš yāall get crazy nosy haha- itās alright.šnothing too interesting will be here anywayšif you would like to come in and be supportive itās completely okiešbut please donāt make it a regular or "normal" thing if that makes sense. just have a sort of limitšbecause Iād still like this to be just my space ^-^š)
there were so many times today where I couldāve been on cups :p like. I had so much free time. and so much happened. and I know on another day I wouldāve just came here and talked all about it- improvement? :p i know it sounds dumb but to me cups is such a serious and valid addiction. if I tried to stop it I wouldnāt. Iāve never even set my account on break or deactivated it once(just cos idk. Itās kinda unnecessary unless you just- nvm Iām not gonna rant about this again) and I always come back. I always come back. cups is always in my incognito tabs- itās never not there. but I just came here like twice to refresh the page and see notifications and thatās it :ā) Iām honestly not that addicted to cups anymore. it used to affect me so much but itās just a site. okay well yeah Iām sorry it is alot more than a site. it means so much to so many people and itās helped millions- but I just feel like the way it affected me(atleast the negative part)isnāt worth it at all- when I see it just from that it is just a site. from the creeps to the attention seekers and liars and conflicts itās just a site. there was that one person on here. I donāt really wanna think about them but theyāre the reason I actually havenāt talked in rooms for months. and I cried a bunch and they just took so much thought in my head. "keeping you in my thoughts" literally never means anything if you say it all the time. sorry. but what the person did to the way I thought is something itās just- no oneās ever changed my mindset and feelings and way of thinking and- myself- so much even irl. even my dad when he (/) and it leaves me numb and literally sui or my mom showing up 10 years later when I thought she was dead or my best friend going "you do you" when I was talking about wanting to *** km.s. yeah I ruined my mood. but not even they changed me like that person did. and I still think about them. I realize what it sounds like so no we werenāt dating and no I didnāt like them. they were only tagged in a couple of things. but one forum they replied to and I check that so often and go on their account and still. permanently banned. I know that code and my listener friend does too and even a commod. ā¦ā¦..why- I swear I was actually kinda okay before this :ā) I *** myself up sm I swear-ā¦. :ā)
so Iām gonna bring one of my empty planners right :D? (youāre not allowed btw and itās not really meant to be possible but :p doesnāt matter :p I found them in my bag :p/ididnt) and Iām gonna tell him that I forgot my device for that day :D and how my other teachers didnāt care or we just didnāt need our devices(heās not the person to really bother you about a dumb excuse)(oh and btw he likes me lol or atleast heās much nicer to me :p cos he notices how depressed I always am. lol. Iām not even joking at school my skin actually looks grey. I can barely open my eyes and I just look so exhausted and dead :ā) he keeps asking me if Iām okay but anyway) and then :D heās gonna sign my planner :D my empty planner :D and that oneās gonna have 1 signature and honestly Iām never gonna need it for history again but if I do then thatās officially the history teacher planner :p heās very likely gonna forget about it anyway. then heās gonna remove my name :D and Iāll have to do it on thursday :D and then Iāll figure it out from there :D
I hate mondays.Ā
I hate everyday-