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- In The Gloaming TW *just in case*
In The Gloaming TW *just in case*
With the tragic loss of the feed and after much debate and discussion. It's been decided to create a new thread. Soul space so to speak. A journal of sorts.
A place where I can dump some of the nonsense that goes on in my head.
While replies are welcome - they aren't necessary.
@mytwistedsoul Ok wait a minute here - what the hell is a kudo anyway? And who came up with it?
Who decided to eat the first coconut?
How desperate was the person to eat the first lobster?
What the hell was that person who milked the first cow doing?
Octopus - seriously?
And snails - why in the world would anyone want to eat a snail? Like oh look - I'm alittle peckish let me munch this shelled slug. Oh gross! Ketchup probably doesn't make everything taste better
Sometimes I wish that good fairy would come down and bop this field mouse on the head
@mytwistedsoul
It was the bunny bopping them on the head.... you twit.... not the good fairy.
Why are we singing this anyway?
Let it snow! Let it snow! Let it snow!
Carry on carry on! Nothing to see here! Rubber neckers :)
Kind of depressed
Having trouble with some words - either leaving them out or adding them in where they don't belong
H*ll some of them just don't look right.
Problems with concentration and focus
Urges yesterday
Idk - now I feel kind of anxious lol
Our mirage - Unseen
Alec Benjamin - Mind is a Prison
Thrice - Beyond the Pines
The Hu - Wolf Totem (w/ Jacoby Shaddix)
*place your mind right next to mine -
soon you'll see who lies inside.
Then you will know just what it's like-
to live as though you're cursed.*
Kind of funny - this post has been sitting here since 6 am this morning - waiting for me to hit the big blue button
@mytwistedsoul
Thank you for sharing this music here. I can see you in each song— like you should, with music. Wonderful choices, I love all of these (last one especially reminds me of R)
@ThePizza Thanks M - I'm glad you like them too. The last one is the best in my opinion.
@mytwistedsoul
I really like the instruments they used too
@ThePizza They looked real neat didn't they? Half of them I have no idea what they were but they looked amazing. I liked too that Jacoby Shaddix looked like he was really having a blast hanging out with them - didn't he?
@mytwistedsoul
Yeah I noticed that too, he did look like he was enjoying himself— there
@NoneTheWiser Hey Jada - I'm glad you like them - I sort of fell in love with that one by The Hu - there's something about the drums in the beginning. And the chanting and of course Shaddix's words - it does get in your pulse. Calls to you
Whiskey taste is on my breath
Part of me is scared to death
What if I told you the truth
But I chased it down with 90 proof.
One more sip for the tortured soul -
I don't understand why some people don't realize that they should tread alittle lighter around the teens. Why some people seems to find the people who are at their lowest and just push against their wounds harder. Bring it to someones attention and days pass and nothing is done. Seems cruel and lacks - compassion and concern.
Alittle emotional today - feeling sad - I feel like I'm looking for something but I have no idea what it is or where to find it. I hold in my hands a blank map and a broken compass and I'm a directional idiot
Twenty One Pilots - Ode to Sleep
Twenty One Pilots - Addict with a Pen
Shinedown - Monsters
Ded - Hate Me
@mytwistedsoul
I hope you found some water--- and that the sand turned to solid ground
Supposedly this is the translation to The Hu - Wolf Totem
There was another translation but it involved blue manure so - LOL!
I'm seriously hoping this is right
They're Mongolian - Just a really awesome song -
The lion is in a bloody battle to the death
The tiger overcomes the leopard in a match
The elephant thrashes the leopard in a contest
Man intensely struggles with a leopard to contend
We, the lions slaughter the leopards in a match
The tiger beats the leopard in a contest
The elephant trounces the leopard in a fight
Man strenuously strains with a leopard in contention
An instigator, the jealousy of a snake it could be
And Khan Garuda leaps up above into the air
A growl, the jealousy of a tiger it could be
The blue wolf comes too from far away
Hu – hu – hu – hu…
Hu – hu – hu – hu…
Provoked, the snow leopard competes with its rivals
Ten thunderbolts strike at the same time
A hundred hearts energized in the thundering roar
Simultaneously a thousand colliding thunderbolts
And too, ten thousand lightning strikes in the heavens
Hu – hu – hu – hu…
Hu – hu – hu – hu…
This deluge is the leopard battling in a deadly fight
The surges of the leopard scuffling in competion
The awesome leopard swats, blows to overthrow
The glistening leopard slashes in the scramble
Hu – hu – hu – hu…
Hu – hu – hu – hu…
With the speed of the falcon advancing
The wolfs courage at times flaring up
The strength of horses hooves, their paces pounding
The mark of Genghis Khan, an overwhelming impression
@mytwistedsoul
Wow, that's such a cool thing they've written. Haha, yeah blue manure doesn't really fit here does it?
@NoneTheWiser OH wow! Did did you draw that Jess? That is absolutely amazing! Thank you so much!
@NoneTheWiser Lol - ok! It is a really beautiful picture - thank you!
I hold in my hands - my soul and my heart. Both fragile - both wounded and scarred
woven out of gossamer strands of glass - waiting to shatter
I feel I shouldn't have shared something here last night - I didn't think before I wrote - I just wanted it out
Now there's some regret for sharing that pain and I'm fighting the urge to withdraw
Cue the hoodie and sunglasses
Imminence - Erase
Imminence - A Mark On My Soul
Imminence - Scars
Return to the scene - was anxious tbh - felt kind of surreal - A kid waiting for the monster to pop out
Got alittle emotional - felt alittle sick
Idk - did I do the right thing?
Kind of Idk - feel like I'm hitting my head against a wall - or should be
What are you the f*cking morality police J? What do you know about morals jacka**?
Feeling alittle angry - at myself - energy is - HOSTILE - put your teeth away
Idk - this is going to sound weird - but sometimes I feel like I'm trapped inside myself and I would chew my own arm or leg off to get out
It always feels like I'm just not handling things the right way - kind of like - hang on and give me a minute - I can f*ck this up worse.
On my mind - Headache - tired
Don't remember much of yesterday - I think there was alot of dissociation going on
Automatic portable crepe makers - because apprently - you never know when you might want one
The light at the end of the tunnel is a train - just saying
Torn and undecided - seems kind of childish and stupid - should I or shouldn't I?
Get Scared - Sarcasm
Speech Patterns - Another Mess
Catch Your Breath - Fade
@mytwistedsoul
Sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is just your friend shining a light torch in your eyes😊🤗
Call me Atlas
At the moment it feels as though
The weight of the world is on my shoulders
There is no god
No angels
No heaven
This is my own private hell
@mytwistedsoul hope I'm not intruding but just wanted to leave you a safe hug if that's ok.
@crimsonLime6525 You never intrude Lime. Thank you for the hug
@mytwistedsoul
I know that weight...😔😔😔 one friend Soul once told me to call on him when I'm in need so I know he takes the weight of the world on his shoulders...and his end saying always stays with me and strengthens me in times of need...😔😔 I thank you...
@emptydriftingraft Be gentle with yourself and your thoughts. I'm sorry to see they keep catching you
@mytwistedsoul
Truly private, for
We others can only view it from the
Outside.
Still, well reach in to (try and) help.
Candle
@ThePizza Thank you M - your candle shines very bright
On my mind - god
I used to pray - they were never answered
I still wonder if that's what's missing
Thoughts have been - all over but I can't seem to hold on to them for very long
Anxiety has been high but not a panic high - more of a go go go anxiety - keep busy - keep moving
stay too busy to think. I've decided I don't like to think - it causes me to have thoughts. Thoughts are painful -words bring them to life
So now I stare at the screen - willing my thoughts to magically appear - write the words I want to say
Why do I deserve the science
To feel better about you?
At a loss I lost my cool
I denied that I found you
I tried to be a basket case
I did not surprise you
I'm trying to find a signal fire
Let me know when I should move
But you, amplified in the silence
Justified in the way you make me bruise
Magnified in the science
Anatomically proved that you don't need me
Why do I desire the space?
I was mourning after you
I was lost and lost my shape
There was nothing I could do
I don't want to waste away
It was all I gave to you
Take me back and take my place
I will rise right up for you
But you, amplified in the silence
Justified in the way you make me bruise
Magnified in the science
Anatomically proved that you don't need me
All the while you waste away, you're asking
"Did I really need another one to take me down?"
Everybody knows it's something that you had to live with darling
Nobody's gonna tear you down now
There is nothing you keep, there is only your reflection
There was nothing but quiet retractions
And families pleading, "Don't look in that cabinet
There's far more bad than there's good, I don't know how it got there"
That was something your father had burned in me
Twenty hours out of Homestake eternity
You can go anywhere but you are where you came from
Manchester Orchestra - The Silence
I spoke to God even though He don't care how I feel
I sent Him letters yet I found them returned and sealed
All of my prayers left unanswered yet still I would kneel
I spoke to God even though I don't know if He's real
I heard that evil is silent
I know my demons stay quiet
Until I ask for compliance
That's when they claw and they riot
So keep me awake
Even though I
Wish to escape
From these thoughts
I ponder and pray
Even though I've
Lost all my faith
I will survive
I watched below as I saw my son fall in a field
I let his heart fall apart then I taught it to heal
I let him ask me for guidance
I met his questions with silence
Hiding the answers inside him
I always knew he would find it
So keep me awake
Even though I
Wish to escape
From these thoughts
I ponder and pray
Even though I've
Lost all my faith
I will survive
He placed the earth in the palm of my hands
Asked me to fix all the problems it has
Now I think I finally understand
So keep me awake
Keep me awake
Keep me awake
Even though I've
Lost all my faith
Keep me awake
Even though I
Wish to escape
From these thoughts
I ponder and pray
Even though I've
Lost all my faith
I will survive
Jacob Lee - Guidance
You have got to be Fucking kidding me - Someone needs to get a handle on this damn censor
If I'm really in crisis I sure as hell ain't going to post about it on a freaking thread - I'll just do it and that's it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhT9IO58GGA
Kiss my a**
@Dawn04 Eh - I had something all typed up and and went to post it. It said I was in crisis and the whole post just disappears. Just ticked me off because it doesn't give you a chance to fix it or change anything.
Lol sorry
@mytwistedsoul You don't need to apologize to me - you know that. *hugs* It really does suck they don't let you just edit it instead.
@Dawn04 Lol - I need to watch the cussing or at least block out some letters. I mean - it's not like we can't figure out what it is but I know some people probably disapprove. Yeah - they should at lease kick it back to you and give you the chance to fix whatever it is.
