Scoliosis
Hey. I’m not that open when it comes to talking about my problems either so here goes. I have scoliosis, i was so oblivious to the entire concept until i found out that i have it, a month ago. My friends think I’m strong but that’s what I project to the rest of the world, no one knows that I’m struggling, genuinely so. I hate it when people worry about me too. I cry myself to sleep every night. I’m studying architecture too so when i work I’m in so much pain and discomfort, just not enough to give up on my passion too but I can’t work to my fullest capacity anymore. Nothing is the same. I’ve seen 4 physios too, 2 chiropractors and they help sometimes but then it all comes back and I feel worse. It’s like i’m punishing myself further too with my course, be it drawings, models etc but what am i supposed to do? I’m angry at everyone, mostly my friends, my boyfriend too. I know they’re worried about me but they don’t have it so they’ll never understand the constant discomfort I feel before i disappear on a night out, or when I’m unable to be shop for more than 2 hours. I recently bought a back brace too and it helps sometimes but having to wear it all the time when i go out? It disgusts me as much as it helps. I’ve completely disassociated too, emotionally. It takes so much strength to wake up and be a light to people, be there for people, be around people that don’t have it. I envy them. Im jealous of them. I’m scared one day i won’t have that strength to carry on anymore.
@sunnyYard2279 Ohhhh Sunny I want to send you a big warm and soft hug! You have been so brave to post about this. I know personally the problems and pain of scoliosis so I can genuinely empathise with you. I too do not share about myself, and being open lends us to being vulnerable when all we really want is kindness and warmth.
Feel free to message me and we can talk person to person, just click on the blue butterfly. https://www.7cups.com/@MistyMagic
Or choose listener from the list here https://www.7cups.com/BrowseListeners/
Otherwise if you want to open more here that is fine too.
Well d**n, that ain't good...
I have scoliosis too, but evidently it's nothing like yours.... If I were there, if you were okay with it & if it would help, I'd offer to massage your back at the end of the day so you could relax & sleep better.
Something to remember about handling your condition: when you are being strong & courageous, it doesn't usually feel that way. True courage, true strength is in what one does, not in how one feels about oneself.
@sunnyYard2279 @sunnyYard2279 I also have scoliosis and am in constant pain. I'm on pain meds that barely help. I've been to physical therapy, about the same as the pain meds. I've had shots in my back four different times, for me the shots were painful and didn't help, but I've heard some people say it helps them. I have a back brace which helps some unless I'm doing things, it just helps with light walking. The problem is I get hot very easily so it is hard to wear. And I don't like wearing it in front of people.
If I complain about my back hurting my family members say their backs hurt to but they can lift things. (No they don't have scoliosis.)
I'm not sure if you tried the shots but they might help, yoga is supposed to help if you can shoulder through the pain.
And I'm with you on the people sometimes. I have friends who can run and jog. I don't remember the last time I could do either. Even as a child running was painful. I'm afraid of ending up bitter, especially when my friends don't understand why I won't do something. Its not that I won't but can't.
I also hate feeling worthless/useless. Just know if you need to vent feel free to do so, I find it helps with not taking it out on loved ones.