Personify Your Depression: If my depression were a person... [fill in the blank]
Personify Your Depression: I learned about this coping technique today. Imagine that your depression is a person separate from you. The idea is that personifying our depression helps remind us that depression doesn't define who we are ourselves, and that invasive self-critical thoughts we experience often come from our depression and not our healthy minds. Some things to think about are: what kind of person would it be, what kind of hobbies would it have, what would it look like, what would its name be?
So, if your depression were a person, what kind of person would it be?
If my depression were a person
They'd be needy and annoying. Always holding my hand or behind myback always smirking, sufficating me in there presence. When I'n with other people, they'd whine and complain, make as much noise as possible so I can't consentrate or socialize. When I'm outside they'd be poking my stomach telling me I'm fat, that just maybe i should start eating less or try to see how long I cou;d go without eating, betting on the hours or days. Critisizing my clothing choice for the day. When I'm allown point out that I have no direction.
The type of person my depression would be is an annoying, self absorbed, hyper, clingy, asshole.
They'd jump on the bed, make excuses for mess, gossip, yeel, try to be the loudest they can and probably pour boiling water from a kettle on someones hand just to see if they'd get a reaction.
If my depression was a person it would be my mother and sister yelling at me, he would be a constant reminder of how messed up I am, and of all I have lost. If my depression was a person he would be my anxietys big brother, Smothering me every second of my life. But my depression cant be a person because I can not run from it. But instead it is a brokenness, an emptiness I feel deep within my chest. My depression is time. Something that can not be escaped. My depression is in the arguments I have with loved ones. My depression is in my head replaying words that I should not listen to, but MY DEPRETION SCREAMS THEM IN MY EAR TAKEING THE VOICES OF THE PEOPLE I TRUST THE MOST SO I HAVE TO LISTEN! My depression can not be faked, be I am my depression.
If my depression were a person, I would slit her throat and kill her, just how she killed me. I dont know who I am because she has taken over my life and ruined it. Sometimes I wonder whos the real me because I know this isnt it. I just feel like everything is my fault. Shes just a constant reminder of whats wrong with me. She makes me feel wrong. Everything I do is wrong. I know im ugly, you dont need to remind me. I know im boring, you dont have to remind me. I know im worthless. Did you need to remind me? I feel nothing. The thing is that no one even notices. They dont notice the pain or sadness. All they notice are your mistakes. Depression please die.
@fearlessHickory9058
You have so much self worth, although right now you may not believe it, you may not feel it and each day is very hard to look forward to. I am sorry to hear that you're feeling this way. You have every right to to want to exterminate her the way she hurt you, but you have so much self worth, please don't ever forget that. Sometimes its comforting to know that we're not alone in our struggles and as painful as it maybe, we are all in this together. You've got this.
If my depression was a person, she would be very unhygienic and messy. She would be a scary creature. She would roll on the floor and put her feet on everything because she would knock everything off on purpose.
If my deoressiin where a persin they would aopear as normal as can be but surrounding them would be a feild of static blurring everything they touch, they be loud only shouting the worst things and taking little pains and gouging them untile they appear bigger.
They would be the ghost in the static messing everything they touch and distoriting it untile you can only vuagely understand what it is meant to be
My depression is a controlling bitch! She sucks me into her house and locks me in. I'll look through the window trying to reach out but I'm unable. The anxiety of leaving her house is too big. Every time I step in one of her traps her trigger alarm goes of and she takes me in. Then I don't know how to get out again. I hate myself for being so weak, I hate myself for falling for her traps, I feel so pathetic! The only one that gets me out of her grip is when I worship God. He takes me into His world and restores me.
If my depression were a person, he would be my closest longest lasting friend. We met on my 18th birthday. He gave me one simple gift: isolation. I met real life friends since my birthday, but most of them have been lost because, with isolation, I transmitted confusion and hopelessness to them. After some time, he became more eloquent. He wanted to fit in, agreeing with my self-doubts so I'd go out with people more often and agreeing with them whenever there was a minor commotion between us. In this period, he sometimes sent me texts telling me that I'm unable to do certain stuff, but I was able to prove him wrong and push forward. My depression and I have drifted apart since I started to hang out with new friends. Him and I still contact each other, but not as often. Recently, he has been sitting with me every night even if we don't speak to each other as much as we first met. He's asking me questions like "are you alone?" or "are your friends 'friends'?". I try to ignore him, to no avail. So, I I'm trying to get rid of my depression, my closest longest lasting friend.
If my depression was a person shed be a shadow hidden in the corner. Sometimes shed whisper in my ear and sometimes she would stay silent and just let me feel the pain. But shed always be there, wherever I went. Shed fade into the background when I was with friends, for the most part, because shed know that theyd disapprove. She wouldnt hide because of that though, shed leave because her goal wouldnt be to kill me. It would be to hurt me as much as possible. And it would be infinitely more painful to have her whisper in your ear about your worthlessness when facing friends than alone. She would always be hurting. Hidden or not. Shed whisper in my ear about how my friends dont like me. Shed whisper about my failures, multiplying them. Shed whisper about anything and everything and just like whispers, theyd sneak and hide in my mind. Just small thoughts, all the time. But she knew that eventually the snowflakes would become an avalanche, and would destroy me then. But for the present, she was content to hide and whisper, hide and whisper. Because sometimes its also the small things that bring you down, and like always, she knew that. It would be like a bad relationship. Shed hurt and hurt and hurt and Id never leave. I mean I deserve it, right? And Id beg her not to leave, because with her gone, what would I have left? Myself? Come on, we know that isnt enough. If my depression were a person shed be a warped version of me.
She's elusive.
She coils around my ear, and whispers that I'm ok. I don't need help. This is normal.
She refuses to show her face until I'm alone, and then stands over me, recounting how much happier I'd be if I was 90lbs again.
She forgets that the last time I was 90lbs I was sick. And I was 13. And that I couldn't walk across a soccer field without almost passing out.
She remembers the flat stomach though.
And she lies to me. She runs her cold hand over the back of my neck and tells me how I don't deserve my girlfriend. How stupid it is to think I can actually love people.
She tells me I'm dumb. And cruel. And that it's my fault.
She spoons me as I try to sleep, and gives me nightmares.
And she shames me for keeping this to myself, or for asking for help.
With a smile, she makes me feel empty.
They would be a person who always sees the dark side of things. They wouldn't want friends. They would lay in bed and stare at the ceiling all day. They would hate the light. They would wonder why they're so lonely, but at the same time they wouldn't want to make the effort to talk to people or make plans with people.