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Stanlee00
96,138 M Marching Ahead 10
PathStep 74 Compassion hearts17,165 Forum posts22 Forum upvotes27 Current upvotes27 Age GroupAdult Last activeSeptember, 2024 Member sinceJuly 2, 2019
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Recent forum posts
masking emotions / feel free to share yourself
Depression Support / by Stanlee00
Last post
 July 30th, 2019
...See more My second creating a forum thread. I find that I mask how I'm feeling alot. Like how you might hear a story of that really cheery seeming person just snapping out of nowhere and it turns out they had things going on this whole time and it wasn't always sunshine, roses and pastel colours (as an example). I'm not saying I'm all sunshine but that I do actively change my demenour to sometimes the opposite of how I'm feeling. I could be feeling legitimately depressed/ worried but as soon as another person is in site queue the... [jovial smile] "Hey! How's it going. Yeah. Ahuh. Cool. You know I heard about this thing"......... and so on. When I'm anxious, overthing or being introspective From the moment another person is near me, DOESN'T MATTER!! [relaxed exterior] "yo sup" Anyway, my point being is that a use it as a safety mechanism. I care so much of what other people think of me (I know I shouldn't but it's easier said than done) were I feel as though I always need to act upbeat. I used to have this complex about feeling fake all the time since I would act fine, and if I act fine then everyone will think that way but then I also won't be able to really open up to anyone, at all. I still don't know what to think of it but I wanted to acknowledge it for myself. By joking round I don't have to deal with it in that moment. I feel like other people out there do this as well. Penny for your thoughts. Share if you want to I'm just glad I got that out there.
I can't tell anymore
Depression Support / by Stanlee00
Last post
 August 5th, 2019
...See more My first thread on here. Feel free to share your own experience or vent a little. Was wondering if anyone out there feels the same. That you can't tell whethere you are actually depressed or not. Am I just sad or is this legitimate depresion. Sometimes i feel like i need to validate my own feelings and it's hard when sometimes i don't know how I actually am. Like what's the problem? And at times I don't know if I blanck out but its as if i don't know how i am feeling. like am I sad, well I don't feel "sad" but then I don' feel "happy. And if I admit to depression then then everything automatically becomes "bad" to put it in simple words. I feel like there must be some sort of threshold to depression. I often think perhaps I deal with high functioning depression. In which Ican interact and get things done. function. go to college. walk outside. take a shower. talk to people. But i still feel depressed or sad or lonely or stupid or the human version of a sloth whatever it is and I look fine to everyone else. Maybe others can share their experience.
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