How do you visualise your depression?
Depression is one of the hardest things to explain to our loved ones, because it robs us of our very ability to communicate, and it's so easy to believe that it's a part of us, whereas in reality, it's something that stops us being us. How do you see your depression and what name do you give it?
I tend to view depression as a wave that pulls us under the surface of the water - we can see the surface, see the light, but it stops us swimming up to get there.
[Source]
Even though I am a young adult, I've always imagined myself as a lonely little girl; Frightened by the big dark monster of depression, and it makes me tremble, with fear. I am afraid to achieve greatness, to be happy, and to love another person, because that's when it shows up. It eats away at my peace of mind and tears apart my joy, into a million pieces, with its teeth. The good I feel, gets replaced with apathy and nagging, negative thoughts, because it feels like positive things are soon to bring me pain, again. Asking for help and believing I can receive it, feels like a fairy tale, that won't come true. High hopes feels like potential failures. The love of someone, I feel like I don't deserve, results in their disappearance-in my life and in my heart. It makes me feel like a child, who's too afraid to leave her covers of repetition and safety. Whether I can feel it coming or not, my depression lurks around the corner, ready to destroy my happiness and my will to live. In order for me to defeat it, I need to be a strong adult, instead of waiting for one, to save me. (I hope that makes sense.) :\
@RedPandaExpress88
One of the best descriptions I've ever heard. It's as though you took the words right out of my mouth & out of my soul.
@Area25
Thank you. I have felt that way for a very long time. I'm sorry that you feel the same way, too. It's not a good feeling to have such depair, but it is a little comforting to relate to someone who understands; and it makes how we feel, when we are depressed, feel less lonely, too.
Like a greyish cloud over my head, sending rays of sadness, hopeless and fear through and around me, trapping me within.
A black hole that sucks everything in, and tries to take even more till there's nothing left
A spiraling abyss within my stomach and chest. Pain is it's fuel. As the spiral turns it's edges grind against my soul making me want to curl up into a ball and fade into nonexistence.
I see it as a dark, sometimes greenish energy, that fills my body and steals my breath. So when I'm trying to meditate, I visualize the dark energy leaving my body and the light energy filling me.
A mental vacuum that is hard to escape like a black hole.
I think of it as a dark mist that weighs my heart and my body
It is a tumor in my head and behind my heart.
I see my depression as a large pit or hole. Sometimes Im on the outside of the pit and I feel ok. Other times on standing on the edge, teetering, trying not to fall in. Loosing my balence. Sometimes I find that Ive fallen in. Think Alice in Wonderland. There is an opening at the top,where I can sometimes see the light of the outside.An opening that I can climb out of, but I just have to find the willpower to make it out on my own.
Grrr. Depression. Very bad period of life. I can describe it like you are surrounded by dark clouds and you can not see behind them, and you are staying on the same place
