Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

I'm not good at posting daily, actually this is my first time on the daily check in. Today I felt pretty good, little stressed between college tuition and my car brakes giving out, but I wasn't crying and wishing I was dead, so that's good enough for me.

I feel awful. I just don't like myself and I feel like everything I do is a mistake. People poont out all of my flaws and it makes me feel self conscious which brings me down even more. All I want are some friends but nobody seems to like me. Grades are dropping and I'm stressed about midterms. It's too much

I cant sleep fuck, my life feels like a fucking dream,

Like everthing is just a fucking permatrip.

I dont even know how to explain this weight in mygoddamn forehead.

Im sorry that im cursing, but thats the only way i cant vent out my emotions properly when im not working or bored just jerking my attention span off, i feel like a pile of shit and ahmfuckgoddamnit.

Feeling better than usual. Been feeling hope and making plans. Worried it's just a peak and I will descend again and not be able to get out.

I don't know. I feel lost I don't know who I am, what I want or even if I care. I feel empty and alone.

Its getting easier to lie about feeling good, but it hurts so much more these days.I feel like I don't deserve to feel anything, happy or sad, and I can't think myself out of this.

It makes me feel a little better that I'm not the only one going through this... I feel empty and nothing exactly make me happy anymore. I feel like I'm only faking a smile and its not my true feelings... Is this depression or not?... I'm sorry I posted here... I can clearly see a lot more people need help than I do...

Today I feel really good. I am doing well.

I feel numb for the most part. I think I cried it all out to the point where I can't feel anything. The military is stressing me out. I want to go home but I can't. I have to remind myself to eat otherwise I won't. I can't sleep without drinking or using pills (over the counter of course) it's become a daily routine. I don't know anymore.

I feel like an emotional wreck today. I have an appointment with a professional tomorrow and I'm super nervous for it :( my mind is all over the place and I just don't feel like myself