Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

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I've been extremely sad lately. Im not quite sure why anymore, i kind of feel like its my own content. I kind of wish i knew what was wrong so i couldproblem solve. I feel like i need to go back to therapy but my parents wont let me. I've also had a lot of anxiety today

Hi @AmberRun183

I like to think of depression as being like a cone with a wide mouth at the top that flutes down to a narrow point at the bottom. LIke a trumpet. Now imagine a marble spinning in that wide part. When everything is fine in your life and you're in the right space, you spin in that wide point.. little things pop up from time to time but you rebound if you deal with them and they don't build up upon you. If they do build up upon you or you can't deal with things as they come, you start to spin down the flute but as you go down, you spin faster as you continue to rol lower down the flute. At this point, it becomes harder to get yourself back up on your own at that point. You need support to get you back to the slow spin of the top.

What support options do you have around you at the moment, @AmberRun183?

Sometimes when our sadness becomes consistent and we

i agree, my friends are sort og supportive, also my school nurse

I feel lonely. That no one cares. Depressed.

I'm a weird one here. I have a celebrity worship syndrome, that is what my doctors said. And today i lost my happiness, my parents ripped off all of my poster and burned it. And they did not even care what im saying. They always blame me. Anothey issue, they don't understand my situation. Sometimes they said they wish i were dead

I'm so sorry that your parents do not seem to have a way to connect with you, and are seemingly so misunderstanding. They may not have a way to deal with the fact that they either have no way to help you, or no way to handle it themselves. My mother was the same when I was a teen, and left me to deal with some pretty major things on my own. You have two choices - give in to the easier, bad impulses that you feel give you some release OR fight. Fighting I will say is much harder - however, every time you fight one small impulse to cut, or stay calm, or not give in, you win. Every time you win, you can give yourself one strength point. The strengths in your bank accumulate - you get to keep those and it does not take long to become strong. Trust me - been here, done that. But you control it.

One little strength at a time babe. You are so much stronger than you think.

I feel scared, lonley. I don't know why. I have a boyfrind and a mother who loves me. My brother have ADD. My father is an alcoholic. I live with my brother, my mother and her boyfriend. I wish I had a better life.. Because I'll be smaller and I puke after I have eaten to lose weight. I'm 16 years old and I weight 50kg and I'm 1,67m. But I think I'm still fat. I want a body that I can be proud of. I'm also smoke, because if I don't smoke, I cut myself. I tried to stop smoking, but I could not control myself..

Cut my wrist 6 times today

You are stronger than that! I'll be here for you. Write to me, if you want to talk ❤️

you do matter! God loves you!

I feel lonely, completely disconnected from the people around me. I moved to another country 6 months ago and since then I cannot have any connection with the people that I live everyday with. I feel they are very different from me and most of the time I am not interested in improving relations. Not that I am alone all the time, I go out, travel with other people, but still feel lonely. I do not think the problem is the other people, I've always been a person who takes a lot of time to trust other people. But it's been already six months I am here and I cannot get interested in anyone, whether friendship or any other kind of relationship.

I felt horrible this morning, but ended up feeling tons better after practicing my band music with a group of friends. Later on today,it's like I'm just a piece of trash to everyone. Always have someone talking about me behind my back, no respect for me, so much stress, sadness. I'm just tired. Nothing seems worth it anymore. Too bad I'm not going to do anythingabout it. Ugh, I hate everything right now!

I feel so fat right now. I feel like I need to workout more even though I can hardly walk down the stairs. I am with my step mom right now and she keeps making me eat! I tell her I am full but she says to eat anyway if I want to go to crossfit. It hurts to eat and workout but I can't stop because then I feel like I weigh 50 thousand pounds. Is something wrong with me? I weigh 115 right now and hate it.

there's nothing wrong with you darling. u know , u are a beautiful creation that god has created ever. don't feel down by it and try to get up okay ? talk to me if u have any worries

Today i woke up crying which hasnt happened in years i have various coping methods that i learned when i was a teen....but today it just hit me all at once ....like all my failures thses past 2 years came rushing back along with painful memories.......i felt like i just didnt measure up to what wverybody wanted or wasnt good enough...im usually the one all my friends go to because generally im a strong person but today i really just needed someone and i got the cold shoulder and realized that i was alone

Hi @kindCucumber6875

It happens like that sometimes, doesn't it? Things build in the background and then you have a release. Don't get too despondent about your friends. I've been much the same as you for the last several years (balanced and the ear for everyone) and when I've had meltdowns then people haven't known how to cope with it. I guess it's because it's so out of the blue. Perhaps the same applies to you also, I don't know?

In my situation, what I learned about myself was that I needed to open up more about the little things that bugged me rather than hiding them. That allowed others to understand me a little bit better, share the goods times and the bad times with me, and prevent the big meltdowns that came every year or so.

While none of this may apply to you, it's just an example of why you shouldn't be too despondent when your friends weren't there on this one occasion. It may be as simple as them being so surprised that you were upset that they weren't quite sure how to handle it when you weren't Super-Duper-kindCucumber6875. Keep that in mind because dwelling on that sort of thing in a negative fashion can really pull you down.

Not great family tries helping then fails miserably making me feel worse than before its a never ending cycle I'm glad they try but they need to also leave me be and take me to a doctor it shouldn't be that hard

Repentance

I feel lonely, sad, and I feel like no one cares. It sucks ):

@philosophicaleyes1536 You are not alone, we care. I promise

Had a really bad night, with a so called friend

How do I actually feel? I feel terrible

I feel actually pretty relaxed, but then again really anxious at certaintimes. Still happy, but that's temporary.

I feel better than usual, but I don't know how long it'll last...

I feel better than usual, but I don't know how long it'll last...

Completely numb...I can't even anymore someone tell me it will get better?

Numb.

I feelokaybut not great. Like slightlystable. I'm listening to depressing music so it's not helping

I feel like, in dealing with disappointment and heartbreak and failure, I've been cutting pieces of my heart out bit by bit. It feels weak and pained and if I could reach into my own chest and rip it out, I would. I fantasise about carving my chest up a lot. It doesn't really matter if people care and would miss me. People caring doesn't stop every day feeling like being struck breathless and crushed under the weight of your own stupidity and uselessness.

Today I am tired, I work way to much. I am also in pain, as i am currently suffering from arthritis and dealing with chronic bronchitis. I am also thankful to God for all he wonderful things in my life. Pain is just a reminder of the good in my life.

Let's all remember how much worse things could be. I'm angry when I can't.

I'm just really upset today...

I can barely make it through the days. I have family but they all say they don't want me around and that I annoy them and ruin their lives. I don't even have friends anymore. They all gave up on me and everyone tells me I'm a failure because my grades aren't all 100's. I'm just a lost cause now.

You are not a lost cause @exuberantSailboat479 Just because you do not have all 100s does not mean you are. 100s in every class are hard to get, i dont have them either. I know how you feel, you're not a failure though.

You're not a lost cause! You are a good person I can totally tell!

I don't feel like dong anything. I feel trapped.

I tell my friends and family I'm getting better and that I'm alright but in reality I'm to afraid to tell them the truth. I don't think I can ever be fixed. I don't think I cam really be wholeheartedly happy and unafraid. I feel like ive disappointed them.

That's exactly how I feel x

I feel lonely. Worthless.