Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

I feel confused, betrayed and hurt. Lonely and weak. The one person I trusted completely broke me. And all I can think of is how this is all my own fault for putting all of my trust into one person.

I think I've finally hit rock bottom.

I'm really in my head this morning. That feels a bit distressing.

Better then yesterday. My kitten turned out fine and cooling off about my ex-boyfriend trying to contact me.

I feel down. I keep eating bad things and then complaining about my weight. I don't know exactly why I've been doing it so much lately. I know my roommate not listening to me gets me frazzled. My house is a mess but, I can't seem to get myself to clean it up because I'm exhausted after work. Student loan debtors who try to manipulate you to pay more than you can afford blow up my phone. I feel like closing my eyes and hoping it will all go away.

I am feeling more mentally quiet these days but my anxiety and panic attacks have hit the roof in the last couple of days (work stress).

Work chores, housework chores etc still overwhelm me but I'm taking baby steps in the right direction

All over the place mostly sick and sad because I had a dream about my mom that passed last august and she was reading her poetry to me one was called angel another one was called dream it was really weird idk if it was some coincidence or meant to be I was stuck in it for a while I don't believe it was bad. It just made me sad with mothers day coming up and she always had something nice or comforting when I didnt feel well or going through a touch time

I feel stupid for still caring about someone who broke my heart and who clearly shows that they don't care about me. I just want this feeling of being wounded it to end. Today is not a good day # setback. I really need to quit social media. It is making it worst.

I feel worthless.

I am barely functional today. All I've done is stare at my ceiling and lay in bed for hours. I feel numb, like I'm floating outside my body watching myself. I can't seem to care about doing anything or talking to anyone. It hasn't been this bad in a long time.

I feel worse than before I told my friends and family what's been going on. My closest friend, the one I thought would be there for me since I am ALWAYS there for her won't even talk to me...She doesn't even do anything when I tell her she just goes and gets my other friend to help. We've been best friends for years now and we've told each other things we'd never tell anyone else.It's like loosing a chunk of me.Every single person I've told never stays friendly to me the next day or ask how I am. They just have fun and make jokes at me. I just wish I could cut myself again. I'd probably feel more at peace than having to suffer through this everyday.