Weekly Prompt #28: How do you practice self-compassion when struggling with depression?
Welcome back, group! I hope you are all being easy on yourself this week.
Last week we discussed: How are you feeling today?. Thank you to all who participated and shared their thoughts and questions for discussion. They were thought-provoking questions and thoughts. I hope you all did too. If you didn't share yours, please share them here and I look forward to reading and discussing them with you
This week's prompt: How do you practice self-compassion when struggling with depression?
Please know all thoughts and experiences are valid so no matter how small or big it seems, do share with us and we will discuss our thoughts on it together.
I try to practice self compassion by celebrating each small step I make. Instead of focusing on the end goal. By doing that i can be more forgiving too if I don't manage. It's less of a failure. Like today I celebrate I worked out! So I try to be proud of the things I did do, instead of focusing what I didn't.
That being said, that's a lot easier on the good days then the bad days. But Im working on it!
@SleepyPersonForever every little accomplishment, is a huge victory ❤❤ keep going sweetie ❤
@SleepyPersonForever It sounds like celebrating small victories and being kind to yourself during difficult times is helping you practice self-compassion. Focusing on your accomplishments, rather than what you weren't able to do, is a thoughtful way of encouraging yourself through challenges with depression. What kinds of small things do you find most helpful to acknowledge on your harder days?
Celebrate how you're working on this too, Sleepy! You're so right that each step matters. I'm proud of you for working out yesterday too. 💛
@ASilentObserver self compassion is hard, depression is hard. I'm not really doing a good job at either right now. So I try to ignore my feelings and thoughts, and make others smile and feel loved instead ❤
It really is hard Tiny, I hope you feel that on those dark these we want to uplift you as much as you do with us. We all care about you a great deal and want you to feel loved to. So we give the big hugs to you, until you have enough energy again to give the tiny hugs to us❤️❤️❤️
Pancake hugs to you❤️
@Tinywhisper11 It sounds like you're experiencing difficult feelings of depression and finding self-compassion challenging. Focusing on others can be caring, though neglecting our own needs risks increasing suffering. You deserve kindness and understanding during struggles with mental health.
What helps you feel somewhat better in hard times, even if just for brief moments?
Take your time, Tiny. It's so wonderful that you want to help others when you're feeling down!! 💛💛 I wonder if there's any small act of self care, like a mindful cup of tea or listening to your favorite song, that you could do for just you today?
@ASilentObserver Trying to give myself little moments of joy, alone or with my friends.
When I'm depressed i tend to isolate in my home and just be in bed or in the sofa. Sometimes, when I can, I try to do something that I like: make a good snack/meal that I love, tell my friends to come over or do something, play the guitar and sing my favourite songs.
I really struggle with it but sometimes I can do it and it really helps me to feel better
@sabriemotions It sounds like you are going through a difficult time with depression and isolating can be all too easy. I am glad to hear you are making efforts to practice self-compassion through small acts of joy, even if they don't always feel possible. What kinds of support do you find most helpful during those times you reach out to friends?
@ASilentObserver just hang out and get distracted by talking or doing things together like playing board games :)
Self compassion is the opposite of depression, at least for me. I try to do self affirmations, even though I don’t necessarily believe them.
i think saying bad things about yourself can be countered by saying good things… it feels fake… but whatever, self torture sucks.
@SeekForgiveness730 It sounds like you are struggling with finding self-compassion during a difficult time with depression. Saying negative things often makes one feel worse. You deserve kindness, especially when you're facing challenges with your mental health. Have you found any activities or people that bring you a sense of calm or peace during these times, even if just for a short while?
@ASilentObserver no.
i tend to isolate. Even though it’s hard I force myself to do gratitude and meditation.
I just feel rundown…. Like those flattened animals you see on the side of the road. I feel like the flattened animal on the side of the road… you can see me, but there’s no life there the life is gone.
i think maybe I should up my medication.
Now I feel angry at myself.
This site is my self care to be honest.
@ASilentObserver
Hi, ASO,
How do you practice self-compassion when struggling with depression? I push myself to meditate and work out and keep up my prayers. But sometimes that doesn't work and I fall back into only getting lots of sleep.
I don't practice self-compassion. I don't know how.
@WharfRat It sounds like you are experiencing difficult times with depression and finding self-compassion. You recognized a need, and coming here is a caring act. Your well-being is important. What thoughts or feelings arise for you in wanting to practice self-compassion?
@ASilentObserver
I don't know how to do that without feeling weird. It feels phony and a lie if I try to think of something good about myself. Lately, especially, I've been feeling bad. I try hard at the group meetings but I think that they would all be much happier without me.
I have a hard time with self-compassion at the best of times, let alone when I'm deep in depression (which is most of the time, to be honest). I don't feel like I deserve good things when I'm in that state, so all it seems to do is frustrate me and increase my suffering.
@Zeraphim It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of difficult feelings when struggling with depression. Feeling like you don't deserve good things must make practicing self-compassion even harder. What helps you feel seen or understood in those low moments?
If I can find a good crisis worker to talk to, sometimes that helps. Most often, I sleep and wait for the worst of it to pass before I'm able to functionally do anything to help.
How do I practice self compassion when struggling
with depression?
01/19/2024
I acknowledge the little things. Every achievement, no matter how small, is something to be proud of. I remind myself despite my lack of motivation/energy, all of my skills and aspirations are still there. I will get back to them in time, when it's right for me.
Gratitude, too. All of the small things in life that give me comfort or make life easier can be cherished.
I am patient with myself and with life. Things may pile up, but I can get through them. I may fall behind what I expected, but I am still making progress.
Sometimes the best progress comes after a period of rest. I can feel guilty about pushing myself to burnout, but I can also use this time to identify stressors that I can manage more effectively in the future.
@JarofSeeds627 It sounds like you have found some meaningful ways of practicing self-compassion during this challenging time. Maintaining gratitude and patience especially seem like strengths. You care deeply about your personal growth and getting back to the things that matter most to you. How have these practices helped you feel less alone in your struggles?
I have had to learn a lot more empathy and patience with others as well. I'm trying to be less of a bitter person, which is hard for me as a survivor of childhood neglect including hoarding. When I see people avoiding tasks like not cleaning, I first think it's a personal attack or they just don't want to, but then I realized (including from talking to people) that MANY people are having my same struggles. So I also experience less shame (seeing myself as "just like an abuser" for neglecting myself) as well. It's a more positive spiral of helping each other, my friends and I, now than just getting resentful about each other's faults.
@JarofSeeds627 Thank you for sharing your journey of developing more empathy and compassion. It sounds like reflecting on how others struggle with similar challenges has helped lessen feelings of shame. Finding understanding and support among friends as you each encourage one another is truly caring. You have come a long way in learning to be gentle with yourself and others.
@ASilentObserver
Tiny acts of compassion are good. Break it into more manageable pieces.
A singular act of compassion often feels too big and I feel too tired and lack motivation. If I break it up, then maybe I can do that one tiny step, then another awhile later, and another. Then eventually I have done that one thing - just broken into pieces.
I also like to go by the rule "anything is better than nothing" - something feels too difficult to do? Well maybe I can do half or a quarter of it... And that is better than not doing anything at all. Even if it's hardly any effort put into it... Still better than nothing. And a tiny achievement.
It's like collecting little crumbs of compassion.. Then maybe by the end of the week I have a pot full of crumbs :D
@SleepyShyCat Absolutely
@SleepyShyCat Thank you for sharing your experience with struggling with depression. Collecting little crumbs of compassion through tiny acts each day sounds like a gentle way of practicing self-care when bigger steps feel difficult. You are determined to support yourself through this challenging time with understanding. What aspects of self-care do you find most helpful in lifting your spirits, even just a little?
@ASilentObserver That's objectively absolutely impossible. Being kind to myself with depression leads to excessive distractions from the real world and own responsibilites. I try to be kind to myself but then my mom tells me to study for my final semester exams and judges me for being always distracted. She says that we are what we think, and if I'm having troubles with my life had been all my fault because of thinking I'm a piece of garbage.
It simply doesn't work.
@Politonno I hear you Poli. It sounds like you are experiencing a lot of difficult emotions and inner turmoil. Focusing on self-compassion during times of depression can feel impossible, yet it's so important to your well-being. Please know you don't deserve to be so hard on yourself. How have you practiced kindness with yourself in even small ways in the past, despite the challenges?
Thanks, but I haven't been able to work to myself. I sometimes looked pictures of interesting church and mosque buildings such as the Sagrada Família and the Saint Basil Cathedral, but I quickly get distracted from my own responsibilities, I can't organize myself.
@Politonno It sounds like you've struggled with distraction and organizing yourself at times. Focusing inward can be challenging, but small acts of self-kindness are important. It is admirable that you want to be kinder to yourself.
The final semester exam I had 2 days ago went good, I thought there was content from the last exam of the subject, but actually didn't have to do it because of my relatively not bad mark in the last one. So, it was easier and I was more prepared and most of that stress disappeared. It's the first exam in these last months that actually went well. My last final semester exam is tomorrow and I think I have it under control