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overwhelemed

User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 November 26th

im feeling so overwhelmed idk what i want to do in life exceppt sleep all the time. im on disability and it pays the bills but gotta do something with my life not play games all day. thought about many options still cant decide got no car pet would be nice but so much work and responsibility. been evicted a few times so much has happened and im already 37yo pretty scared and btw im a guy if it matters. i see a therapist but idk what would help. maybe a house and car and travel or move to another country or apprenticeship or this or that idk anymore 

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User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 November 27th

@determinedZebra820

Small steps....work,small changes.

When we are in a situation we do not want to see that.  we think up what if we did this or that?   and convince ourselves that would solve this or that but ... in reality moving would be same issues different place.    Make a plan or list of small things you would like to do... try one and then another spend a whole day not playing games and then another ....

go out if possible to see the world around you. maybe you could pet sit for someone to experience if a pet would help or be too much.  

14 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 27th

@toughTiger6481 yea so many options life passing me by hate apartment living and upstairs neighbors floorboards I do get out at times though 

11 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 27th

@determinedZebra820 I just want to scream I've had it so much anger

10 replies
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 November 27th

@determinedZebra820

Anger and frustration is a powerful thing in sidelining us or having us do something impulsive. 

What would you like to do? and what steps would it take to accomplish that ?

i have been stuck and angry and feeling like I could not do things until I pushed myself to do one thing and then one thing more etc. i used to find myself daydreaming  or  planning in my mind ... it starts as an escape .... then becomes a trap......... because the steps to our goal ....take effort and planning and sometimes setbacks ....... we skipped all that in our wishing/ daydreaming  we could do ___( insert item).  do you have any supportive friends or family?   sometimes when we start to change we need a coach/ cheerleader that pushes us out of our comfort zone. 

if your neighbors in apartment frustrate you have you spoken to them ?  or just letting things continue to bother you. talking may not resolve a noise issue but you will know you did something. 


9 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 27th

@toughTiger6481 wrote letter to neighbor and sometimes tell in apartment to rid my stress

8 replies
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 November 27th

@determinedZebra820

Well that is a good thing ... believe it or not many do not  say anything or write letter etc and just let it bother them ...

you made the choice and did so i am sure whatever you feel overwhelmed about you can do it..... you are stronger then you .......realize most people are. 

7 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 27th

@toughTiger6481 but I just yelled again 

1 reply
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 27th

@determinedZebra820 punched my pillow did some push ups if I had someone by my side for once or something idk

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User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 27th

@toughTiger6481 I can't take it anymore idk what happened to me but I'm unhappy angry miserable 

4 replies
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 November 28th

@determinedZebra820

I feel your anger and frustration ....

I have felt like that too could barely get out of bed wanted to harm myself ... and just like not knowing why I was so down. It is hard to break out and i asked for help.   It does not have to be another person but i challenged myself ......................to do things everyday even if i absolutely  dreaded it.... I felt it was impossible ... I challenge myself everyday to do something  I have procrastinated or ignored ....I push myself to do things i have not done.   Not going to lie i do not always accomplish these self made tasks but when i do ... i shows me I CAN 


3 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@toughTiger6481 I keep praying but nothing is working 

2 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@determinedZebra820 I have a few friends but haven't told them my whole story or anything maybe I'll never be happy or carefree 

User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 December 2nd

@determinedZebra820

When we pray we often want a certain outcome .... the answer to our prayer may not be exactly what we wanted.    If it is not the answer we want we may ignore it...

Sometimes we just need to take a super deep breath and start anew instead of the path we thought we  would take. 


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User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP December 1st

@toughTiger6481 I'm trying but I'm jealous of my sister cause she is married and I have no one to help me I'm trying to help myself but I can't do it anymore 

1 reply
User Profile: toughTiger6481
toughTiger6481 December 2nd

@determinedZebra820

I think very strong ... admitting all you have about how you feel admitting jealousy over something you do not have.  It is an accomplishment so many live in denial and could never admit things so hold your head high. 

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User Profile: Abhir
Abhir November 28th

I am in a similar position. I am not disabled but have a severe mental illness. But stuck in, no job. Family has money, so I survive. I need to get a life.

User Profile: franklin9000
franklin9000 November 28th

I know how you feel. I'm also disabled. I sat in my house for years with nothing to do. I kept trying to figure out ways to be active but it never panned out. My dog was the only reason I didn't do myself in. But now he's dead, I sold my house and my father stole my money so I have nowhere to live, I tried to move across the country to be with my fiance of 7 years and she kicked me out after a month and her getting the rest of my money, and I'm in constant pain. So things can get much worse. If you're able to in suggest traveling. Even if it's small trips locally at first. Also a big problem for me has always been not being able to be productive so there's no meaning to anything. So if you can work on things, build things, or help others in some way that will make you feel accomplished and give your life meaning.

4 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@franklin9000 yea I'd love to travel but it's expensive idk what I want anymore yet I don't want to waste life either 

3 replies
User Profile: franklin9000
franklin9000 November 28th

Traveling is really cheap if you do it right. When I travel I go by motorcycle and bring a tent, sleeping bag, and air mattress. If you wanted to travel to other countries you can travel to poor countries where the cost of living is much cheaper. The plane tickets are like a grand, but if you stay for a couple months the low cost of living makes up for it.


If you have any hobbies or skills where you can be productive and you make yourself do it regularly it gives meaning to your life. I know it's hard to do, especially at first, but it helps.


If you don't mind me asking how old are you and what's your disability? I just joined this so idk if you can, but if you want to message me and talk you're welcome to. I have no one to talk to, am really down, and really lonely. So it would help me too.

2 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@franklin9000 in 37 overweight always tired don't work sleep too much 

1 reply
User Profile: franklin9000
franklin9000 November 28th

I'm 39 and underweight. I have a spinal cord injury but can still walk short distances. You should try forcing yourself to exercise. I understand how hard it is to start doing that and that it's even hard to keep doing it consistently. But I promise you that if you start doing something productive it will make you feel better. Then after a while you'll feel better about your physical appearance and you'll feel better physically. And then looking back you'll have accomplishments to feel good about. Then you also might feel good about talking to girls (or dudes whatever you're into) and that always makes people feel good. I've been trying to exercise a bit everyday or every other day. It's just difficult to gain weight and muscle because I don't have money for food or a way to cook food. But it still makes me feel a bit better and it helps with the pain a bit in the long run.

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User Profile: DrMelissaB
DrMelissaB November 28th

@determinedZebra820 Really sorry to hear you are struggling! It sounds like you are doing all that you can to work on bettering yourself and your situation. I would recommend thinking about and doing one small thing per day that may improve your mood (even slightly). These little moments will add up! 

Feeling better starts with a single message. Check out my profile and reviews.
1 reply
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@DrMelissaB trying to figure out what may have led to my current feelings but so much has happened up to now maybe I was never happy 

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User Profile: sunnyLake7661
sunnyLake7661 November 28th

Yes, feeling directionless and being placed with all these thoughts with no one to guide you is an awful feeling and I'm glad you are sharing your thoughts here.



There are many options you can take, but first you should make a list of what YOU want, do you want to live a simple life or do you want more. Being content with a simple life is not a negative trait and as long as you stick to it it will help guide your goals like how much money do you need to reach this ideal life for yourself, what job would I want that could lead to this goal, does it have to be something big or something small?



Man to man, I believe it's best to first establish what your current situation is, did you go to school, do you remember any fond memories, did you have any moments of accomplishment after a fierce struggle. Reflecting on the past is something people take for granted and I assure you first knowing yourself is important. 



Video games could be the start, you enjoy games yeah? so why not consider attending a game dev course. In Japan there's a concept called Ikigai where our purpose in life should be balanced with something we are interested in, can make money from and gives the world something we hope for. Many people who choose a purpose that doesn't fit them will never be happy but those without purpose will also become unhappy when they doubt the purpose they didn't have. 



Many people can feel trapped and overwhelmed in your situation and the best solution is planning for the future. Even if you don't currently have massive plans, make sure you set yourself for tasks that engage you but don't scare you off. View the time you think was wasted as a step to recover and prepare before making a big step.



As long as you realize your problems and make small steps to resolve em then that hard work will pay off. I hope you find a purpose and direction in life that will get you out of your slump. And if you ever feel stressed again don't be afraid to post again.


-SunnyLake

13 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@sunnyLake7661 I just am so overwhelmed idk what else to do except yelling to release 

12 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@determinedZebra820 I really don't know what I want anymore or who I am what I value nothing and physc wards don't help

User Profile: sunnyLake7661
sunnyLake7661 November 28th

@determinedZebra820

Take some time to calm down and when you're ready try something, then go for it. 



If you feel mad or have really bad thoughts, then you need to channel that into something and determine the best way to help yourself. Feeling overwhelmed will only cloud how you think, so find a time when you aren't overwhelmed, to try and sort yourself out. 



Therapy and psyche wards won't fix people's life; there's no cure for the past but they can provide some form of direction or help keep you going on the right direction, I think you should consider this after you decide what's best for yourself.



Purpose is a subjective thing, many people don't know what to do in life. But if you just go running around in circles then you'll only end up back where you started.



-SunnyLake

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User Profile: Lymboangelic
Lymboangelic November 28th

@determinedZebra820 yo I get it. I'm not on disability, but I've been evicted multiple times and I feel like I have no purpose. But a wise soul once told me that it takes time to find your purpose, you just have to be patient and keep on doing your best. So keep on pushing. You'll make it eventually.

2 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 28th

@Lymboangelic wish i had someone to hold me comfort me life is so hard alone 

1 reply
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP November 29th

@determinedZebra820 idk where I want to live permanently or anything and can't just go buy a house tomorrow 

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User Profile: Imprezzza
Imprezzza November 30th

@determinedZebra820

I hope your okay...  Message me if you aren't. 

2 replies
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP December 1st

@Imprezzza hi was feeling paranoid about person outside apartment building driving nearby and then driving away maybe I isolate too much afraid of being targeted 

User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP December 1st

@Imprezzza I'm going crazy inside all the time thinking so much got no one idk what to do 

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User Profile: redPark9371
redPark9371 December 1st

@determinedZebra820 I'm a 39 F in an abusive relationship with no car and dealing with medical issues myself. I'm not on disability just yet but have thought about applying for it.

Whenever I need to recalibrate my compass back to true north, I always think about what I wanted to be when I grew up or what my favorite hobbies were as a child. Sometimes we have to take a glimpse in the past to use as a point of reference for the future. Sometimes all it takes is a slight shift in perspective. It's easy to see for others, but even harder to see for ourselves when we aren't looking. 

I hope this helps! 😊

1 reply
User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP December 1st

@redPark9371 but I literally have no one I'm not doing well at all just going crazy 

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User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP December 1st

@determinedZebra820 thinking I might be happier somewhere warm year round another country perhaps somewhere peaceful 

User Profile: determinedZebra820
determinedZebra820 OP December 1st

I feel stuck going to the VA for veterans care I get triggered by it but they won't let me see community care and Medicare would get expensive