Whenever I go home, my parents treat me like a teenager again - how can I stop this from happening?

Returning home can often remind parents of having you around the house as a child so they might (without realizing) interact with you as if you were a child. They might talk to you in a teenage like fashion, such as asking you to do things around the house in an authoritative manner, or they might question some of your adult choices such as drinking alcohol. I would recommend trying to have an open and honest conversation with them. Tell them about how you are feeling and how their behavior can make you feel. Be clear with them that you are an adult, and have your own life away from them and when you return home you want to be respected by them as an adult and an equal. It's likely they might not even realize they are doing it and an open conversation might help. If this persists or becomes a major issue, you could consider some sort of family therapy to try and resolve the issue. Clear and good communication is the place to start though!

you may be able to, talk to them about what you like, and what you dislike how you do get treated. Sometimes parents don't see eye to eye, with us and they do forget but always having small talks and braking down how you feel is, okay. we are humans. we become adults, we do have to face life challanges but i know you gonna do an amazing job at it.,keep up the great work and always know you are all winners, keep the great job up and do what you do best. dont try to lose who you

It can be hard for a parent to realize that their actions are making you feel this way. It's equally hard when you are behaving as a responsible adult, and your parents just don't see it. It might be a good idea to talk to your parents. There are a lot of ways to approach the conversation. Here are just a few ideas to inspire you, depending on your personality and your relationship with your parents. Let them know that you appreciate them, and that when you return home to spend time with them, you feel much younger again. Ask if there is anything you are can do while you are at home to reward them for raising a child to adulthood. Are there any tasks you can help with while you are home, to help them out? If you are not comfortable having a discussion with them, consider showing them by your adult behaviors, like taking out the trash without being asked, or offering to help prepare part of the meal. Anything that shows your adult skills in a way that they will notice.

It can be difficult for parents to accept when a child of theirs has grown up, even when that child has become an adult. Adult children may return home to find that their parents aren't treating them in an age-appropriate manner and this may begin to cause tension in the parent/adult child relationship. When this happens, even before it happens consistently, it may be a good idea to start opening the dialogue with your parents about 1) how their treatment of you feels to you, 2) why it's important to you that they accept you in your current phase of life (as a grown and independent individual), and 3) how they can treat you in a way that is consistent with your self concept and current status. Explain that you would feel more supported if they treated you as the adult you are, rather than the child you were (who they knew) when you were growing up. You might even think of examples of improvements they can make or substitute behaviors they can adopt instead, though these ought to be presented to them in a kind and nonjudgmental way so as not to unnecessarily escalate the conversation to an argument. It is a tender topic that needs to be handled gently and with great care, however, it is also important for boundaries to be set so that your parents and you can all feel mutually respected as adults.

This is part of emotional abuse which you are going through I reckon. Unfortunately it is very difficult to blame anyone of emotional abuse so easily given there is not enough awareness or knowledge about it. We all go through emotional abuses in our daily life and most times its our close people who are the perpetrators. We love them and they misuse this as our weakness to gain control over us. You are not wrong on your part. You have to make sure you yourself do not treat yourself that way just because your parents want you to. You should sometimes be affirmative in your response (not harsh) so that they atleast get the clues there is something not right in their behaviour. If they confront you just say it what the matter is..politely. I am 100 percent sure they will find newer innovative ways to embarrass you and thus confirming my theory. The relationship could get worse but you must not be harsh and hold your stand that you do not want to be treated that way. Sooner than later they will realize that you are not comfortable with their behaviour and if they confront again , this time speak your mind even if you have to be a bit harsh. Most times this behaviour is seen in parents when their own relationship is'nt very warm and they vie for their children's attention by controlling them. You need to be affirmative and polite at the same time. My opinions are my own. 7cups does not take responsibility of any advice to our visitors. Use you discretion properly on any opinion given here. I hope it helps. Cheers.

You can try talking to them, choose the right time and ask them if they have a minute to talk, let them sit down and explain to them how you feel, and that you dont like the way they treat you "as a teen" and let them know how you would like to be treated, remember, the tone of voice matters, speak to them in a normal yet loud and clear voice, avoid talking in a sarcastic way or nagging, just be confident and clear about what you expect from them.maybe you could ask them why they are treating you that way, maybe there is something your missing or something u did in which they thought was "teenage" learn from your mistakes and let them know that you asked that because you want to make yourself better and be mire mature.

Sometimes, parents don't really realize how or what they are doing without any intention to do so, So, it's important and a partly responsibility of you to make them assure that what's gotten into you or what's troubling you. Talk to your parents about how they treat you. It is possible that you parents are not aware that they are treating you like a child, so you may need to just bring it up. Try talking to them about how they treat you and ask them if it would be possible for them to stop doing certain things. Stay calm, step back, and reflect on how they are making you feel. Then decide to react in a manner that will not reinforce their image of you as a dependent child. Here are some things to try instead: When family members tease you about past behaviors you have outgrown or overcome, don't be offended.

This does sound like a frustrating issue that stems from a lack of communication between you and your parents. Sometimes parents can't pick up on the cues of society and growing up, and they'll always think their kid is their baby who need sheltering however much you've grown up. On some level this is okay, parents are supposed to be protective. But when protective turns to overprotective which turns to restrictions and regressions, it becomes an issue. You can let your parents know all those things, and that you feel like now that you're grown up, you should be allowed to be treated like an adult

I think your parent is showing their love and care, and that is why they want to make sure that you are safe and pamper you as much as possible. Think of it that you are lucky to have a loving parent that shows their affection towards their children. Not all children/family share the same love. I am sure you can speak up for yourself and have a good conversation with your parents. It shows that you establish a good relationship with your parents, and I would enjoy the presence of my parent pampering me than not receive anything.

Parents sometimes show their care by treating their children in a way that isn't always preferred. The perception of maturity that your parents see in you will somewhat govern how they address you. Show your parents that you are mature through motivation and determination. This could be by accepting responsibility for things that will relieve your parents of some duties. Change often takes time and there is no set pace for change to happen. Time is one of the key factors that may eventually bring about the results you seek and your parents may therefore see that you are capable of managing your own life. Remember that everyone's experience varies and what works for one will not necessarily work for another.

You need to sit them down to talk to them. Tell them how you feel about the way youre being treated and make sure that they know you dont like it. You need to be able to stand up for yourself and tell people how you want to be treated to earn respect. When youre able to defend yourself and say what youre thinking, as well as state your opinion, theyll take you more seriously. They will always see you as their baby because they have raised you as their kid. Theyre gonna want you to stay their little kid forever but you need to let them know youve grown up.

That is normal because parents like parenting. That's what they do. Have you tired talking to them about how that makes you feel? It can feel frustrating and like they don't understand that you are an adult and you don't need to be treated like a teenager. Getting frustrated at them won't help. Talking to them about how it makes you feel and how you would rather they act might help. Parents just like feeling like they are in control and they cannot help but to baby their children. That's what they have been doing for the last however many years. They probably don't know they are making you feel that way, unless you tell them.

It can be difficult to change others' actions, but when this happens it can be beneficial to confront them. This should be done in a safe environment and only if you think this is the best solution. It is difficult to be treated in a juvenile way. The most important part of confrontation is outlining how YOU are feeling as a result of the direct treatment. Use more "I" statements, trying to not make them seem like the attackers. This will typically make them see your point of view without making them automatically feel defensive as their negative actions are being called out.

i think to an extent, your parents may not even realize they are treating you in that manner. to them, you will always be their baby and child, so it comes naturally that they are concerned about your whereabouts. however, i can also understand how frustrating that can be when you are a grown man/woman and your parents are treating you like you are in high school again. i think communication is always key. you can have a talk with them and tell them kindly that you are not a child anymore and although you appreciate their concern, they cannot talk to you in that manner anymore.

It's common for parents to treat their children like teenagers again when they go home - this usually causes feelings of distress for the person experiencing it. Perhaps the goal is not necessarily to stop being treated in a particular way, but rather work with your parents resolve this issue together. Being honest and explaining how this affects you may help, and hopefully they will be willing to listen. If they are not, speaking to friends or other family members may help ease the uneasiness experienced. There are many ways to reach out, namely the listeners at 7 Cups, trusted individuals in your life, etc.

I will ask them to have a meeting over tea then make it as a opportunity to have an open conversation with them. First I will show my appreciation for their love and care. Then I will share some evidences and proof that I am responsible for myself. I will also express how I feel when they treat me like a teenager and clearly set the boundaries with them. This meeting has rules. No criticism and judgment allowed and use kind and compassionate language to turn the meeting into a successful one. Showing up with open mind and readiness to see through others’ perspective.

The ways in which parents show love can be different a lot of times. It is important for you to understand that just like you, your parents parents also grow up and have unique needs of the stage they are in. When you say that your parents treat you like a teenager, it is important for you to identify that what part of it you don't exactly like. In that case, you can communicate to them that this aspect of the way they treat you is not particularly appreciated by you. In the meanwhile, you can also take up responsibilities that usually adults take up in order to show your parents that you too are capable of taking up adults responsibilities.

Oh I understand this completely! I'm in my 30s now, and even when I turned 30, my dad would treat me like the 15 year old who left home, not a grown woman with a child of my own. It's difficult for parents to accept that their children aren't children any more, but boundaries are important. In my case, I had to have a very firm chat with my dad about the fact I was ready to be treated as an equal, and that I had earned that right by living in the world without my parents. What you tell your family is up to you, but usually you can't get around it without some kind of frank and honest conversation!

Our parents are parents. They will always see us their children, no matter if we're 12 or 28. It can be tough to be seen as a teenager, when we're adult. You have to remind them that you grew up and want to be treated like the adult you are. Tell them that you feel uncomfortable when they treat you this way. they don't necessarily mean it in a bad way, sometimes they're just happy to see their children and wants to take care of them, and the only way they find to do that is to treat you this way.

This is a very common problem: many families struggle to redefine roles after years of living as parent and child. Once the child grows up, they try to transition into a more peer role, but the history can block that change. It is easier with some space and distance, but visiting home can erase those boundaries. If it's safe, try talking to your parents! Set down the boundaries you want and explain why. Negotiate with your parents so that everyone is on the same page, then enforce boundaries by reminding your parents gently and leaving when it gets crossed after several reminders. You're growing up and you're allowed to express that!

Returning home, after you’ve gone off to school, or already moved out is hard. I feel that even now when I visit my mom on the weekends. It’s been over 30 years since we’ve lived in the same house. I have my own grown family now, so you’d think it would get easier. But it’s hard to get out of the patterns that were set up back then. I try to help out more when I visit. Whether it’s setting the table, or taking the recycling back. It’s not that I’m trying to prove anything, but it’s just helping them out and getting out of the patterns that were set up back in high school, when we never picked up our socks or cleaned our room, lol. Parents love to help out too. And it’s hard for them not to add in their opinion every time a problem presents itself. Phrases like “Thank you, that sounds like it might work” or “I think I’ve got it figured out, but I’ll keep that in mind” Anything, that lets them feel heard, and a small part of things, can go a long way.

try to let them know how you feel. maybe next time they treat you as a teenager you let them know how you would react if you were actually a teenager and how it differs from your reaction as an adult. sometimes, parents treat their child as teenager but then when they need help they want us to act like adults. next time when they do it let them know how their behavior contrasts with each other and that they should treat you as an adult most of the time if they want you to act like one.also, let them know what upset you without feeling offended. this can be done during a family get-together when both of you are relaxed. also, try to reflect upon yourself whether you are being responsible enough as an adult. often, a sense of security is what parents might need in order to realize that you have grown up.

This is not uncommon to have happen. It's important to understand their perspective. They raised you from a child and in some ways you will always be that child to them. However, It is important to have open communication with them and establish healthy boundaries with the people around you. This is one way that may help you grow as a person and also grow the relationship between you and your parents. They are human and are flawed just like the rest of us. I encourage you to try to be understanding and forgiving. Change wont happen over night, but it can happen if you work at it.

Sometimes a lot of us feel this way after we've grown, moved out of the house, and come back to visit. Parents will always see their children as just that- their children, no matter how old they are, because that is the relationship, just as a sibling is a sibling. It can be a struggle not feeling seen or respected as an evolved human being when around family who may not respect or fully acknowledge who you are now versus who you used to be in the past. We cannot control how other people behave, only how we react. And sometimes how we react can also influence how people behave, at that time or over time.

I will tell them that I am an adult and I know what is right for me and what is not..I will tell them not to take too much stress..If there is something that I could listen to them or seek their advice then I will surely pay an attentive ear to them.. As parents they fear about my well-being and there are lot my insecurities and inhibitions.I will understand their point of view too at times..Only parents love me unconditionally without expecting anything.I want to preserve the memories for a lifetime as they are so precious to me.i love my parents.

Set boundairies, talk to them about thi without yelling or judging (and showing you compassionate and understanding about their reason and view, always think and tell them you know they do it thinking it's the best for you). Elaborate them a list of logical reasons why you can think and be treaten like and independent and responsible adult; and the goals you make them until know that prove it. Explain to them what specific changes you wanna them to do and the responsability associate with them (that you already have or are willing to have). Be more distant and on your own when you are with them, take the initiative and sometimes even the parental role (practice reversal psychology, do to them what they do to you). Try to not depend on them, let them reach you and not answer or be there for them so easily (like said no always the first two-three times they ask you a new thing and justify with things you have to do, incluiding taking care of yourself). And if all of that didn't work, think about the option of zero contact, break for ever the bonds, it sounds really hard and extreme but if the situation put you in a lot of pain... you will have to priorize and decide what's more important to you

I'm not forcing you to do anything, so even though it might sound like that, I don't mean it. My idea is that you could seriously talk to them and tell them how much this bothers you and that you aren't a teenager anymore, so you don't want to be treated like one. If you think that this seems a bit embarrassing or if this feels a bit awkward, you can also leave a note saying this or text them when you aren't home. You can also give signals that you don't want to be treated like you are treated right now.

I can understand that it's not a good feeling when your parents don't see the level of maturity you have gained and still treat you like a teenager when you have clearly grown from the experience. I can't say that I know what would stop this from happening because my parents too, treat me like a teenager who doesn't really know everything. And the thing I have learned is, they won't stop until I give them a very strong example that I'm no longer a teenager. Our parents are just scared because they have seen the world far more than us (I know it sucks to hear it, but it's true). They think we are not ready because teenage years is often the time around which we seek independence from our parents, we create our own world that doesn't revolve around them. It's new for our parents. You may not be able to completely stop your parents from treating you a certain way but you can speak about it with them - tell them that you appreciate how they look after you but you need space for yourself so that you can grow. Really express how you want to try something all on your own and it may not work out, but you want to explore and see if it might. Don't be harsh on your parents regarding this, just share how you feel and appreciate what they have done for you. Then keep having small victories where you're doing things on your own and growing. I'm sure that they will come around to seeing how much you have grown :)

Try to flip the situation upside down. Instead of allowing the way THEY treat you to affect you, stand in your "solid ground", your knowledge of who you are - in this case specifically a mature, adult person. It seems to be that when we stop focusing on how the others might see or treat us we start to exude the very trait that we wanted validated in the first place. My answer in short is, when it stops to matter how your parents treat you, you will be victorious. Because either this will help them see you as a grown person, or it will just stop bothering you.

Depending on what age you really are, your parents might address you as a teenager because you have just recently become an adult and are not yet aware of the world around you. Showing them that you are responsible and taking independent decisions can make them treat you more like an adult. If some recent incident triggered it then maybe try having a talk about it and address their concerns and give heed to their advices. Showing and proving to them that you have grown to be a adult is more important that constantly telling them that you are.