How do you deal with the temptation to contact your ex?

I take time to myself to think if it is a good idea not always contacting my ex is a good idea but when I have a temptation to I try to think it is not worth talking to someone that hurt you and never wanted you. or if they cheated its not worth talking to someone that cheated and hurt you really bad I never talk to my exes unless they didn't hurt me and it ended on good terms but if it didn't end on good terms I wont talk to them or text them or ever see them.

Think about why it is that you want to contact them? What were the circumstances that led to the breakup? Have any of those circumstances changed? What do you hope will happen if you make contact with them? Are there other things that you could do to distract yourself from contacting them? It's always difficult when someone was once so important to you and they're suddenly no longer a part of your life. Are there hobbies or interests that you were unable to pursue while you were in that relationship? Remember to not be too hard on yourself. Change is always difficult at first, but each day will get a bit easier.

I would remind myself of the reasons I am out of contact with them and why we broke up in the first place, and also ask myself if trying to meet my temptation will bring a positive result. Weigh up the pros and cons based on evidence and history, rather then on pure emotion or impulse. Then, if I decide what I'm tempted to do is a risk or a bad idea, I try to think of something else healthy that I can do that makes me feel good and reward myself with that healthy reward. I'm always glad to have thought it through and not done it later.

Try to distract yourself as much as possible. Talk to your friends or family. Go out and maybe leave your phone at home so you don't risk contacting them. Try new things every day! You might be able to find a new hobby to help distract yourself from contacting him! Try turning your phone off for a certain amount of time each day, so then you can't contact him. Try going to new places or events that you've never gone to.

Put in mind and focus on why he/she is your ex in the first place to realize that its liking a vicious circle in which will bring me to this same point I AM at the moment. Consider it as a pattern in me in which I always fall to and keeps me stuck in place with no progress but just coming back to and just makes life miserable... bad habit that I just got to get rid of once and for all. If she were good for me I wouldn't get rid of her in the first place so why come back to it.

I deal with the temptation to contact my ex if I had one. By keeping busy. I talk to my friends and get out of my head. I also get in other activities rather that focus on my ex. My ex was a relationship in the past a while ago and it should remain that way. Now it is time for me to move on tow bigger and other things. such as getting a job or going back to School. That is how I would deal with my temptation with contacting my ex partner. If he calls I would not talk to him at all.

I write down all the obstacles I have overcome to move past that relationship, and how that has made me a stronger, more resilient person! I think about how I have learned about how to care for myself and ask for the things I need from a relationship. No temptation is worth backtracking to an unhealthy relationship. Sometimes it feels like we miss that person, but I think most times we miss what we "think" that person was like... sometimes we get so caught up in an idea of what we think it was that we forgot how it truly was. That's the part where you have to stand up for yourself, and trust in your own decision to leave that relationship. You know you best.

When you want to send that text or make that call to talk to them think about how they treated you or why you both called it quits. They had their chance with you and they blew it up to pieces. So, Is it worth all of the pain that you went through? YOU are worth everything and you do not deserve to be treated poorly. So when you want to contact that ex that you still miss put down the phone and think about what you are about to do. If they lost you then what tells you that the same things won't happen again. You deserve the best and they should realize that.

This question is really relatable to me. When I broke up with my girlfriend at the time, I straight up deleted every single detail of her from my devices, blocked her and just connected with all my friends and family for support and love. When I break up with someone, I will never look back. It is the complete end for her in my life because I know that any further interactions will just make it painful and extremely difficult for me. It's not going to work-out in the end. Ending up re-connecting and living happily ever after with the ex is not normal and is an exception that can only happen in an unlikely and specific set of circumstances.

I would suggest thinking about reasons on WHY that person is your ex and what caused you to not be in a relationship with that person anymore. It's okay to have temptation but I feel as though everything happens for a reason and they are your ex for a reason. You could always turn to friends or family or seek someone to talk to if you really don't want to feel bad about giving in to the temptation of contacting your ex. It's not always a bad thing but it might not always be the right thing to do at that time.

I started by asking myself what is causing my temptation to contact my ex. I would grab my journal and favorite pen that I always carry around. I wrote to explore my feelings at that moment and thoughts of my ex. It used to feel like an overwhelming urge. As if I had no alternative or way out but to contact my ex for the comfort, company that I knew so well. Slowly, over time, I started to realize that I had other supports who were there for me — recognizing that writing grounds me and allows me to work through my emotions. I began to work my way through my feelings, away from the temptation. Apart from my reminisce, that sometimes consumes me with irrationality. After a while, I stopped wanting to contact my ex. I would still think of her from time to time. Merely, a distant memory that is nice to know I have lived to experience it.

Try writing down your thoughts and feelings on paper. When I was going through a particularly bad breakup, I would find myself trying to talk to him a lot. I would open up texts or chat messages, and I would type out things but never send them. Later, I worked out that writing things down on paper was safer, since I wouldn't end up sending things I would regret. I started writing things out on paper. It was a lot more therapeutic for me, since I've always liked seeing how much I've written out on paper. When I first started, I was regularly writing three sides of A4, but as time went on, the letters got shorter and shorter. If I was out, and didn't have paper, I'd open notes and write on my phone.

Sometimes the temptation is really hard to handle, since you remember all the good times you had together and you wish to have all those moments and those feelings to be back even just for a short time. Personally when these feelings arise I try to be as rational as possible and I try to remember the reasons why we broke up. I also try to remember the feelings I had when things weren't going well and I tell myself the truth: it is better to resist that temptation. Moreover, I think of what would happen in case I contact her: the most probable scenario is a denial, with delusion as a result. But even if she replies positively it is highly probable that in a shot period I would feel the same frustration that lead us to the break up. Don't do that guys, you only have to lose from contacting back the same person you broke up with.

To deal with the temptation of contacting my ex I try to remind myself why we broke up. If that doesn't work I'll try to find something else to focus on because I know if I contact them it would just drag things out. And personally if I contacted them I'd still be the one to end up hurt so I remind myself that it's not worth it. Sometimes I'll message a friend who knows the situation and they'll give me a pep talk to cheer me up. The main thing the that I believe is most important is reminding and telling yourself that the relationship is already over.

social media and ease of contact gets that little nibbling feeling in your head, sometimes a break from that stops the temptation. question why you want to contact them, is it to fill a void? if so find distractions and things for you to fill that void. if its because you miss them, remind yourself why the relationship ended in the first place, something wasn't right, time away allows you to focus on yourself. yo-yo-ing back into your ex's life is only going to hurt you in the long run, I stings, but know that you're doing the right thing by resisting the temptation

Well, for that you will need to re analyse why you broke up at the first place. If it was from your side, then you will need to remember all the things which led you to the break up. Sometimes, due to many issues such as loneliness or weak time in current relationship, we tend to compare or think about it. If the break up was from your ex, then you need to see what is his/her reason to take the decision. If the situation has changed, then you can try again however if that's not the case then its useless to try again. In a nutshell, best way to avoid any temptation is to analyse the break up and rethink why happened.

Personally, contacting different friends or spending time with your family or in other activities you love can help you deal with the temptation. that way you can bond with the people you still have in your life and that care for you and also to improve your skills in different courses you like and want to improve in! It directs you toward self-growth rather than stepping back into the past and trying to revive something that if ended, should stay this way, It helps both you and your ex to move on and to build a different future and to grow the way you both deserve to grow. the memory and the moments you both share will remain but would not decide the path you choose to go in for yourself!

Realize why you left and or they are an ex in the first place. If it was an especially toxic or obvious reason and it outweighs just getting that sorta “high” from talking to them again, then there you go. Think about more of the negatives with them that made the breakup happen rather than the good times that would’ve kept it alive to begin with. Not to the point where you become depressed. Just to where you can think more clearly. Also understand that if you know there’s a temptation and that the correct response is to not give in that’s already a sign. There’s plenty of people out there to start with instead of trying to “restart” with someone else ❤️

I am 25 years of age and married I really do not have any contact with any of my exes in anyway but, a two years ago it did happen. I tried my hardest to ignore him, even block him but, it seem likes it would not stop him. I had to do something to stop this. I then just told my husband what was going on so we could work something out. We ended up changing my number which was amazing. Blocking his number didn’t help because he would use other numbers but, changing my number worked perfectly.

Corona time=being risky and sending messages to your ex. I completely get that and I would have done the same thing as well ngl. BUT. Your ex is not deserving of ANY time you try to give them. ABSOLUTELY NO SECOND of your effort should be going to the ex because he/she aint worth it bruh. But here are some things that could help 1) whenever you have the tempation, text some other friend. 2) do something like run or exercise or eat whenever this happens just the important thing is, keep your mind off your ex! he or she aint worth your time!

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You tell yourself that the ex is an ex for a very good reason. If it didn't work out the first time, the odds are not in your favor to likely work out a second. It's best to spend that energy with new relationships or working on yourself. Learning lessons from why an ex is an ex is a good exercise. Therefore, before making the effort to contact them, sit down and make a list of the reasons why things did not work out between the both of you. If the list is lengthy or includes phrases such as abusive, wasn't right for me, couldn't communicate, poor libido, unable to express emotions, or a number of other deal breakers - by the end of the list you'll likely have enough reasons why contact is best left undone.

I feel a deep connection with my ex, but I remind myself that there are other things I'm connected to. I need to keep myself grounded, and I can do that by reaching out to other friends, painting, listening to music, playing piano and writing music, or doing another activity that makes me genuinely happy and calm. I often feel the need to do something "crazy" or wild to get my heart racing, but by grounding myself I can find other ways to make myself happy in a more sustainable way without doing something that could be unhealthy for me.

That depends on how you actually broke up and what terms . Every situation is different if you went your separate ways on speaking terms and both of you agreed it was the best thing for you and your ex and you are happy enough to still be friends you can still do that . But if it was not on bad terms you are better just moving on and looking to the future and remember good times will return after giving yourself time and space to do so. It takes time and support from good friends and family to overcome that temptation

It helps to remember the reasons why the relationship ended. The reason most people go back with their ex's or have a desire to have them in their life is because they overlook the problems they had and focus on the good times. A relationship ending is a big decision to make and whether or not the person is in the wrong during that relationship, we often place blame upon ourselves, even if we are not. If the relationship ended through mutual agreement and there weren't any significant reasons to end it and you or them simply wanted time to figure out what they wanted in life, sometimes it can be a good idea to let it play out and let them come back to you. If it ended badly, it's always good to remember that ex's are ex's for a reason. I hope this helps :)

It's difficult at the moment; many people find that they feel that they want to reach out to an ex - it may be something to do with the uncertainty of the times we're in, that they feel compelled somehow to close off unresolved matters, or the loneliness of lockdown is forcing them to chase up old avenues. If you feel the need to get in contact solely because of lockdown, then bear in mind that this situation is not forever and let the need pass. If it's to do with wanting to return to them, then consider what went wrong and why the relationship ended in the first place. Contacting exes is often like picking at a scar; you're not helping it heal if you continue to chase after them.

I would listen to music and/or even though negative thoughts are bad, I would think of times and things they did to upset me, this will take away the urge tp engage in communication. Besides that I will often talk to a friend or family member who knows what I habe gone through and they will encourage me then why it ought to be a bad idea. When no one knows the history I would completely put my phone or communication device away and find something else to keep me busy until my thoughts are entirely somewhere else and my focus away on contacting them.

One thing that can really help with the urge to contact your ex is to write a letter, which you then burn/bury/put away, but do not send to him/her. You probably have many emotions boiling over and certainly you have unsaid words to that person, and saying them is healthier for you than reaching out and letting all of that file into the category of "I miss them/want them back", which is likely not entirely true! Relationships end for a reason but you're very entitled to the chance to work through your feelings and say what's in your heart. I think that saying the words is more important, therapeutically speaking, than anything else.

Well, if you are the dumper than you are right about the fact that your ex might not be back. And this is why we love them actually; because they have dignitiy, they know their self worth and don’t let you jeopardize their value! Believe me you would do the same things if your ex came back and you’d have a worse break up than the previous one. I believe exes should leave some space for each other when they are parted so no disrespectful things happen that you might regret later. If you just need motivation then don’t look for it in the outer world but in your inner world. For instance we women look for outer motivations generally. We seek for someone who will admire us or pay attention to us to make ourselves feel better, like a princess or beautiful. But we should rather count on our intellectual and skills, cause they what helps in the long run. Not strangers coming in and out of your life. So get better at who you are and what you do in general, learn things, make a happy life of yours, show them you are more than just a spouse. That’s how you gain respect in society and have long lasting relationships, by having a life of your very own that no one can shatter but only they would want to join :)

Imagine all the frustration and pain they caused you when you were together. Remember why you broke up with them. There's always that feeling you made a mistake and you might regret it but in the future you'll be glad you did it! You'll find someone new if that's what you want. And if picturing all of that doesn't work, there's a technique that has proven useful to me. Put an elastic band on your wrist and everytime you think of them, pull the elastic band and release it. Just remember why you broke up. Sure, there were good memories but don't focus on those.