Do I miss the person, or the relationship?

I think we miss the feeling we had when we were with that person..the way that person made us feel. The way we were so open and free with them, the way they made us smile and supported us during our low days, the way they made this world a better place, or should I say more bearable just by being there by our side. So i guess we miss the the person we were around them. But then, this is just according to me...I might be wrong too.

This is a great question and i think that once you realize what the answer is it can be pretty beneficial for your growth and understanding of yourself. Sometimes the thing we miss in a certain relationship is the person, but not the way that person really is, but rather how we perceived them and idolized them in the beginning. Also we miss how that person made us feel. The relationship we had with that person might be one of a kind, or might be just something we already had in our life, but that certainly doesn't diminished it's importance to us. We, as human beings, need to feel loved and cared for, that's why we form relationships with others. At the end of the day i think we miss the relationship we thought we had, or we wanted to have, rather than the actual person.

I miss the person who I care about, not what I remember as a relationship since circumstances may have changed to alter that. It is the person that is most valuable to me. A person is very specific and important. They have their own thoughts and assumptions which are very much part of their personality. It is this that makes the person unique and wonderful. Of course this is what love stories and novels are all about, the character and makeup of an individual which is endlessly interesting to read about. Then there are questions of nature vs nurture in the formulation of an individual and their personality. A person is very special and can be a friend and supporter. This is very important to us all and makes us social animals.

It can go either way depending on the situation and how long you have known each other. When missing the person you genially miss being around them, having fun with them, all the laugh you two might have experienced together and everything else. It's normal for you to miss them being the go to person when something great happens in your life or for you to want to go to them when something not so great might happen in your life. When missing the relationship you miss being loved. Maybe their type of love towards you wasn't like anybody else's type of love towards you. Maybe you even felt as though that caring affection only was there when they would show it. You know you miss the relationship rather then the person when you can get that same type of affection from someone else and then you start to like them. That would mean that you miss the relationship more than the person because It wouldn't matter who is doing it as long as someone is doing it or giving you affection.

This is defintiley a tricky question. It's easy to miss the idea of having someone to rely on and getting that feeling confused with actually missing the person. The first step to deciphering this is to learn how to be comfortable and happy being with yourself. IT's important to assign yourself the role of being the person "thats always there" once you learn how to enjoy being by yourself, then you'll understand and grow to learn whether if you miss the person or the relationship. Give yourself space and I want to encourage you to relearn yourself. Good luck!

It can be both, or a singular one of these. I know in my past I had been in a relationship and after it ended, I found myself missing the small things that made the relationship, having someone there and being able to share news and sadness with this person. It wasn't quite the person, but the situation. However, it isn't uncommon to miss a person, the way they laugh or smile or just them being there. I think it depends on your own experience and feelings, you know yourself the best and it might take time to realise what you miss, but do not judge yourself for missing something right now. You are grieving what has been lost and that is more than ok. Take time to care for yourself and build that happiness of being alone back up.

I think that this a problem that most people struggle with after having a special relationship with someone- I for one definitely did. However, there is no right or wrong way to figure this out. I can, however, say that what worked for me quite well was to sit down and write out the things that I were missing. And then I looked at each, really thought about it and determined whether it was the person or the relationship. In the end, looking at my two columns I had made, it was easier to determine which I wanted. Of course, I also did this when I was in different states of mind and it was interesting to see how much my opinion and understanding of each option changed. It's very important to keep in mind that our moods have a great influence on the way we think and rationalize things.

This is a great question. Most times it is the latter option because of the memories, good times, and routines that you and this person created together. However, many people do find they miss the person that was in the happy memories or the person before the breakup. A good way to figure out which one you're missing ask yourself what you remember most about this. It may seem counterintuitive at first, but if experiences come to mind rather than character traits or very specific memories then it's most likely you miss the experience that a relationship brought you. Because while you can recreate experiences, you can't recreate a person or mimic them.

Try to think about it concretely and realistically. Would any other person be fine, if it was the same situation? Or do you want that person specifically? Even knowing it won't ever be the same? Sometimes you just need some time to clear up your mind about these things. If you have the possibility to, talk to the person you have in mind. How does it make you feel? If you realize that there isn't much attraction whatsoever, or even that they get on your nerves, you miss the relationship. Remember also that, there's a reason why you've broken up. You really need to keep that in mind when you miss someone. We often can't imagine a better person than what we just had, but there will always come someone that loves you a bit more. People change as well, consider that you might miss the memory of the person you were together with. I hope this helped!

In my experience, it usually begins with missing the person. At least that is what I acknowledge in the beginning. As time progresses, I gain clarity on whether it is the person or the relationship. Seldom its the person more than the relationship. For me, the value lies within the relationship. The two way street is so important to me. Rarely it is the person I miss because usually the feeling I would get regarding the person, would still regard mostly on the memories of our relationship and not just how I feel about or remember of them. Like my grandparents, I was closer to my maternal grandmother than my paternal grandfather. I have many memories spending time with my grandmother whereas I do not have many with my grandfather. I don't remember missing my grandfather, but I often miss my grandmother. They are both my grandparents and I want to believe I have an equal love for them both but I do long for and miss the times I had with my grandmother more.

Well, that's one interesting question. Maybe you could ask yourself if the person could be replaced. If you had a similar relationship with a different person, would you still feel like you were missing something? You could also ask yourself which aspects you are missing and see if you miss it in general, for example being close to someone physically or is it about THEIR physical presence. If you enjoyed positive things that you got out of the relationship it might be a hint that you are missing that, if you liked things that made the person individual then that's a hint of you missing the person. Either way do keep in mind that you had a relationship with a person so it is likely that you are missing both as an own thing or even the combination of having this relationship with that person.

The answer could be, both. This is dependent on the type of relationship you had with that other individual and the type of person they were. You could miss the individual for the type of person they were, which may have made you feel a range of emotions. You could miss them for the way they made you feel. But most of the time relationships provide a sense of comfort and security, which you may miss once you're out of the relationship. This environment may have made you feel safe because you were comfortable with the environment. This environment changes once you're out of the relationship because you're forced to adapt to a different environment.

Could be both! Depends on how your experience with the relationship was. If you miss being praised and held then you miss all the things that came from being in the relationship. If you miss being praised and held from the specific person, then you miss the person. If the significant other mistreated you, you still can miss the person very much so. It's normal to miss being in a relationship especially if you don't expect to be in another one anytime soon. It is a massive change in your life and lifestyle. After becoming adapted to the specific lifestyle and having it unexpected change, the feeling of being in a relationship can be missed as well as the person.

More like the memories. Break up isn't the best feeling especially after years of being with someone. No matter how hard you try to forget, that memories will stay. It is not bad to cherish those memories because to begin with, you became happy having that person around. It is normal to miss the feeling of having someone saying everyday how much they love you, doing acts to show affection and care. Dear, it is completely normal. Time will come all your wounds will heal, to the point that you no longer miss the person nor the memories. Keep the happy memories it is free and not bad to treasure them.

From my own experience you miss the relationship. Even if it was a bad one with maybe a person who wasn't right for you in anyway there was still good times that you want to hold on to. I missed the relationship, those moments of feeling happy and loved. When I think back on the relationship, I miss the relationship itself and the things that came with that. When I think about the person I just feel angry and hurt. It really depends on the relationship and one what terms it ended. But based on my past relationships and what I've seen others experience, you usually miss the person.

This is such a hard one because often times we can’t distinguish between the two. Sometimes people are codependent and rely on having a partner too much. Sometimes people place to much value into other people instead of themselves. This happens when people validate their existence based on whether or not they have a partner. It’s natural to mourn a relationship once it is over. Some questions to ask yourself: Do I think about missing out on the potential future I had with this person? What did this person provide to me that I am unable or unwilling to provide to myself? Do I need a partner to feel validated? Answering these questions can shed some light onto the situation and assist you with processing your thoughts regarding what you miss. Of course there are other important questions to ask yourself as well, but this is a good start. Keep in mind that surviving a breakup requires time. You have to endure the mourning process of what once was and what could have been, and then prepare yourself for a new chapter in your life without that person/relationship. Keep your head up. You’ve got this!!!

It honestly depends. I've been in a situation like this and it really does depend. You have to ask yourself did I miss the feeling of being loved and cared for or do I miss the person that was doing it? Do I miss the memories or do I miss the person I was making memories with? Can you image yourself reliving them with someone else and for it to not hurt that much or can you not move on from the memory of them? Once you figure that out you'll have a better way to either get into a healthier and new relationship because you know that's what you want, or you'll finally allow yourself to move on because now you have your answer and you are finally getting some closure. :)

Hi there, how does this make you feel? And what ended the relationship? Once you have answered these questions you can begin to think of whether it is related to that persons actions, or the fun events you went to together - ie: the fabrication of what kept you both together. It is only really you that can decide if it is the person you miss but it is easy to understand this with time, meditation and advice. Sometimes it is the person, but often we must meet these people to learn lessons. I wish you the best in your journey :)

It depends on the individual. Some people miss both and that is definitely normal, however, what most people really miss is the feeling of the relationship. In my personal experience, the person wasn't a good person, so I didn't directly miss them. I missed the feeling of being wanted by a person in that way. In the beginning, it can be foggy because you really do miss the person, but as you start to heal you discover that they aren't the thing you miss most. Healing can be a long process but it will make you a stronger person in the end!

I think sometimes we make up scenarios of a relationship in our head and when that relationship ends, we miss the version of that person that we made up in our head. I used to be involved with a guy who was always up and down, but in my head I would try to only focus on the good things. That way when things were over it was harder for me to move on because I tried to only focus on the good memories and ignore the bad ones. When I finally was able to come to terms with who he really was, I realized that I was no longer attached to him, and that finally helped me stop missing him.

sometimes we miss the person and sometimes the memories. if you think about the good times.. and you feel like u want to have those great moments back.. then you're probably missing the relationship. but if you think about how the person made u happy.. things like, they were always there for u. they supported you in everything. kept you calm whenever you lose your temper. smiled for your happiness.. cried for your sorrows. made you feel loved. cared for you. pulled u out of the darkness and everything the person did. their way of talking and all. then you're missing the person. those are just my thoughts about it

That's always a tricky question. What do you think? If you find another person to date as of right now, and you're just as happy, I would say that you miss the relationship. But if you think back of when you first met that person, and feel nostalgic, perhaps you do indeed miss that individual. All in all, missing a person and relationship can be very intertwined so it's hard to say. I'd say that you'll know with time.

I have missed both. But I think it was mostly the relationship that I missed. The good times, even the bad ones. The habit of doing certain things with one person, simply something that was ingrained in my mind as a routine. I did miss the person too, but it was more of an idea of having them in the experience of the relationship itself that I really missed. Even when the person changed, those memories we had didn’t. And the whole concept of something that we had was what I couldn’t let go of. But there were more experiences to come and more memories to make with people I wouldn’t have to feel regretful about, so eventually I moved on.

In my experience, I miss the relationship more than the person because it feels unhealthy to constantly be thinking about my ex and it makes trying to move on harder, especially if I liked how things were going for us. It just gave me a chance to improve my next relationship (it's still lasting, too) and made me more experienced to the point that I'm able to share my experiences with others and hopefully help them out more than usual. Missing the relationship also helped me figure out what I was really looking for in future relationships that I might have.

Perhaps both - and that's more than okay. Breakups are difficult. That person was a big part of your life, and so letting them go can be very difficult. Time heals all though. Eventually, you'll come to realise that sometimes, we lose touch with people for a reason, and for the better too. The most important relationship you will ever have - as you may have heard - is the relationship that you have with yourself, and it should be nurtured daily through self love and care. In the end, you'll find that the breakups and other hardships that we experience, although they hurt terribly, actually shape us and make us better, more resilient, understanding people.

Well that’s a very good question, do you see a future with them? Do you want to wake up next to them in bed everyday? Do you want to start a family with them? Or do you miss the feeling he brought when he was around? Once you answer those questions you will have a round about answer. But before you try and pursue them again make sure you know cause you don’t want to start a relationship just to end it and leave them alone and heartbroken. If you want further assistance feel free to private message me cause my messages is always open!

Maybe it's just the feeling the person gave you when you were in relationship with them. Post-relationship you still know that the person once was able to give you that feeling, so you see them in that same light.. and seeing them, you feel the same thing over again even if they no longer behave like it. You may say you miss the relationship, because of what that person made you feel, and missing the person is figuratively saying you miss how they were. So I guess that is something which is in coexistence most of the times.

If you find yourself living in the past moments with that person then it is most likely you miss the feeling that you had when you were with them. If you are often thinking about the person only, and not about the times you had with them then you are missing the person. Missing the person often comes with wishing that they were with you. However if you are missing the relationship you will find yourself wishing to go back in time and relive those moments. It is important to realize that if you are only missing the relationship, you can experience the same feeling with the right person for you.

Often the answer to this question can be both, but sometimes we do simply miss being in a relationship. As humans we are designed for connection. We want and desire and ultimately, need connection. So if you find yourself lonely after a breakup that is completely normal. Our hearts can hurt so much when a relationship ends. It takes awhile to grieve a breakup. Give yourself some time. Be kind to yourself and take care of yourself. Depending on the nature of the relationship, yes, you might really miss the good parts about the person or good times you hard before the relationship changed or got more difficult. One things that can help it either talking through this with a trusted friend or Listener, or therapist, or journaling your thoughts and feelings. Sending you good vibes for healing.

It is normal to reminiscence on past relationships. There are many aspects that might make us feel nostalgic of relationships that have ended. Reminding yourself on why the relationship ended in the first could help you focus on the present. The person in the relationship perhaps had different goals. Your needs might not have been met and the person was not willing to work on them. Despite the cause, evaluating the reason the relationship ended can help you focus on the future. This can eventually help you heal and move on. It is easy to feel sadness when thinking of the part. It can make you question if you made the correct choice. Focusing on the present and remembering that just because there were good times in the relationship does not mean you should always go back.