Celebrating The Little Victories
Hey everyone ❤️
I said I’d post this yesterday, so oops sorry for the delay ❤️ I got triggered in school yesterday and didn’t manage to finish this post when I said I would. I decided to take a break instead of forcing myself to finish it - finally took my own advice on self-care!
Speaking of which, have you guys taken any small steps lately? Recovery isn’t a straight path, but when we do make a good choice or practice a good habit - that’s worth celebrating!
In fact, did you know that celebrating the little milestones you hit makes you feel more motivated to keep going? Your brain learns to associate the healing work with the little flutters of pride and happiness, so it gets easier and easier to move those recovery muscles! The milestone doesn’t ever need to be big - little victories are just as helpful and just as worthy of celebrating ❤️
So give yourself some credit for all the effort it’s taken to get to where you are today ❤️ You deserve it!
Prompt:
Take a moment to reflect on how far you’ve come ❤️ Doesn’t matter if it’s small or silly - you can be honest about your story here
I’ll start:
Yesterday, I walked up to a classmate and said hi to her, even though I’ve been feeling really socially anxious lately. I also wrote about how I felt about my trauma after being triggered in school. I’ve been doing gratitude journaling, even if I don’t feel like it. Most importantly, I’m learning to talk about my s*xual abuse, and be honest about the effect it’s had on me. It hurt a lot, but now when I look back I can see how it’s really taken a heavy burden off my heart ❤️
Tagging (to join our taglist, check out this link): @adaptableLake3534 @adequatelyInadequate @adventurousBranch3786 @Amelia2324 @AstronomySkies @AveryLove @BeenAKiwi @BillyJoeBobb @blueScarf9326 @BrokenDreamsPalace @BrokenMedic @CaptainTrev @CaringBrit @clare7199 @Colorfulcatsofhope @communicativeYard2325 @CoolBeans29 @crimsonLime6525 @crxxtvfl0w @Dannc7c @depressedsatellite1452 @DinaElwy @domesticEmerald50s @emylly @FallenAngel0128 @Feathersfall @FigureskatingEquestrian @Fireskye13 @Fleggles @Gagaintheroom @gentleLand5245 @Ghxstie @goldenSpruce1512 @Grandmaof10 @Greenchoice1 @gregariousBeing5071 @Grits1910 @hillsideblues @honestpanda81 @HonestWarrior6624 @HopeNChayil @HumanPersonThingy @InfinityandBeyond23 @Itisbailey @jovialButterfly6752 @jr50 @jupitermatilde @JustSmilingThruHell @Kekesea11 @Kickiree @Kimmkimm @kindTurtle3738 @LightofWorld @Lilly28 @lionsaether @littleHuman9247 @littleOtter1342 @LordFireStorm71 @lovehummingbirdsCindy @LovelyOrangeJuice @lowkeyem1001 @Lubo123 @Luchelle @lyricalAngel70 @maya6548 @Mellietronx @mkaitx @MVObserver @mytwistedsoul @navyMango2804 @neatBlueberry3608 @neonDog3649 @neonOwl3442 @NevaehRose @Nolanhm @NoneTheWiser @nonethewiser @notmyselftoday @npos25 @oceancruiser48 @Oceanwaves16 @OffDutySeraph @OneWithSugar @ottersngiggles @Parvlakin @pencilmarks @Pidgeymon @PinkestOctopus @politeBunny7572 @purpleWheel873 @QuietLotus @rainbow3140 @Randomperson453 @RansviewTheWizard @ReallyRuth @Rebekahwriter13 @Redhawk6547 @redmark @Rosa9570 @SarahAlaina15 @scarletPear1945 @selfdisciplinedTiger5523 @sensitiveShade5337 @shellofashell @shiningDay80 @Silverviolets @sleepingd0gg0 @SnippyHam @sofiamartino18 @SoulSupporter102 @stickercollection @Storyhymns1234 @Summer899 @SynSavory @Taylorz27 @tealOak8933 @The0Vetoed0System @TheFisherKing @ThisIsLogan @ThreadbareThinker @TransparentPuzzle @Turtlegrrrl8 @u1146 @Understandingempath @UndomesticGoddess @unique73 @uniqueDaisy @Verysadperson101 @WarriorHeartsSystem @weepingwillow5489 @WelcomeToChat @Worrior22Warrior @Writersworld
So proud of you!
My small step was that I opened up to my husband and shared some insights I’ve put together and learned lately through therapy. He was so attentive and positive and then he shared something with me. ( My husband was directly involved in the traumas that I’m dealing with now and is on his own journey of healing but is super private.) He thanked me for sharing and said that he liked learning about and it gave him some helpful insight into his own struggles. It was a spectacular moment in time! The best I’ve felt in years!!! We are close and always have been but when you’ve been with the same person for a long time (27 years) you sometimes don’t always listen to the other person. However, in this instance, I felt like he actually heard me which was amazing! And I feel like I actually helped and maybe made a difference. I usually feel so helpless so this was a great bonus feeling of helping someone who also struggles with it all.
This is so great to hear! That is so inspiring, I hope things keep getting better for you. It’s really wonderful you and your husband are so supportive of each other through your healing journeys.
@hopeful1971
Hi hopeful,
That is so wonderful how you are both able to work through things on each of your own ends of this!! 
I understand well how it gets with about the good listening time anymore. (37 years here, but, now we are just friends living together, but a decade was so very awful that I don't even want to go into it, + childhood abuse and other situational abuses from others during the time we have lived here) It is amazing to me that you are both even working on things in your own time and ways. That is super how he also wants to work on his part and even cared to listen to you, and pay attention to somethings you've been learning and wanted to share with him about the actual abuse things that went on. I don't know what to think about that and am so glad that I am sitting down. That is BIG! It is still flooring me!!! I can't quite get all this through my head that you both are doing all of this and you can even go to him and express things about what you've been working on, learning,....and he listened!!!! My mind cannot comprehend all this and some alters are wanting to come out. Here, I did have to leave for three years to save myself, but, came back only as a friend. Nothing has ever been talked about, discussed, or anything one bit. I think this is why my some alters are coming out at the thoughs of you actually talking to him as you did and all that. Must go now. sorry. it is big for you and him. happy for you. hope you will be ok. bye
I’m thankful for your words of kindness and I hope my words haven’t been too triggering for you. It was actually hard for me to post that I had a positive step and a small victory. I felt self conscious and almost guilty for posting that I was happy. It’s been so long since there has been movement in a positive direction that I felt like I didn’t deserve it. Posting it and sharing it makes it real for me and all the support here helps to remind me that I am worth something and entitled to happiness. I am feeling very blessed that my husband and I are starting to communicate and I should be proud. We were in a very dark place, individually and collectively, and were hurting each other just to deal with our own anger and pain. About 4 months ago I hit an emotional wall and just sat him down and said I can’t do this another 50 years of feeling like this. I said that I am getting myself help and I need to start living and healing and leave the house and enjoy each other’s company and actually live life instead of just trying to put our heads down and try to survive this existence of darkness. And I told him that I love him and support him and if he too wants a similar future for himself then I’ll support him in anyway I can but that he has to do it on his own. He has not discussed it again since and before yesterday he never wanted to hear about my journey. I tried to share insights from therapy before and he would say that he was so sorry but he’s too deep in his own head to be able to be there to listen right now. He feels terrible about not being emotionally available because he is usually a loving, supportive partner, but he knows where he is right now. So I’ve been concentrating on my own “stuff” and I give him space and let him move at his own pace. So when he was so receiving and giving, after such a long of not communicating at all, it was mind blowing. Hence, the feeling of gratitude was pouring out of me snd I felt compelled to share it with others. I’m not ignorant. I know that there is a hole minefield of mountains to climb yet. I also know that these small victories fuel us to go on. Even though this is a small step, I gives me hope and helps me to continue on with the work I’m doing on myself and let’s me know it’s worth it. I wish you hope and blessings in your future.
Hello everyone
Yesterday I got involved in the Sharing Chatroom and yes my heart was racing and my stomach was fluttering but I engaged in a conversation with several people and ask a few ice breaker questions and I felt so round of myself.
@scarletPear1945 I think that feeling the scared and doing it anyway is something to be proud of, congratulations!
@adventurousBranch3786
Thanks so much, your encouragement helps a whole lot. Reaching out has never been a strong point for me, and especially to people you don't know makes the feeling of being even more vulnerable.
@hopebeyondpain
Hi,
You have a lot to be happy about with your great progress!! You did a great job speaking to the person at school. That was probably very scarry for you, but, you went up and did it and it ended up being a good thing for you!! That is wonderful and so helpful to have those experiences happen for you. 
Glad the gratitude journeling has been going well and that you are able to keep yourself doing it consistently. Very nice.
That's so "major" that you have been able to talk about your sexual abuse some!!!!!!! It is so wonderful to know how much that is truly helping you out and lifting so much off of you. I do not know how that feels yet, personally, as I have not gotten there yet, but, from what you said, it sure does seem so wonderful, uplifting, and very rewarding. I hope that you feel like you can keep sharing what you feel ok with us here to share. I think also for you to even be able to create this post thread and start by sharing your part is a huge thing. I am very proud of you. I hope that you will also feel ok to share things on times that may happen that involve rough and difficult things that you may be dealing with or going through. At least in here, all these things make so much sense and are understood.
@Amelia2324
Heya Amelia ❤️ Thank you thank you thank you for your kind words they mean so so much to me 🥺 I wasn't expecting such an overwhelmingly encouraging and positive response at all, but my heart is now 100 times fuller because of it. Thank you for recognising what a big step this is to me ❤️ Take care, Amelia, and I hope you'll have a wonderful week ahead ❤️
I guess alittle victory here is acknowledging something that happened in the past - I've been in denial alot I guess about alot of things
@hopebeyondpain
Thanks for sharing this and giving such a good prompt for responses.
Today I actually let myself cry when working on my therapy worksheet today. I was referred to the This American Life episode wherein a journalist records her CPT sessions, and where I had been having similar stuck points and ignoring them over the years, I took the time to recognize them and process them differently today, so I cried about it for real.
This is a little win for me since I don't often allow myself to have such strong emotional responses to things.
I am really loving reading about others' self-care and gratitude practice for themselves, we really all deserve more of a pat on the back than we often give ourselves credit for. I saw a quote on a social media thread yesterday that spoke to me and I think some of you might also enjoy: "and remember, 12-year-old you would be overflowing with joy looking at how far you've come"
For those younger members, think of 10-year-old you or even 7-year-old you.
Thanks to everyone for being a great community where even onlookers and non-posters feel the support that emanates from you.
@JoyfulMovement
Heya ❤️ Wow, it sounds like you worked hard to get to that point, I'm really proud of you for hitting that milestone! I used to find crying super uncomfortable, but it actually feels really relieving to let it out, doesn't it?
I love the quote that you shared - it's so sweet and heart-warming! I instinctively felt that 12-year-old me would've been sad to see me now, but then I thought a little more about it and realised that 12-year-old me would probably also be awed by all the progress I've made and all the hard work I've put into my life. I think 12-year-old me would be proud of me ❤️
Thank *you* for being a part of our community ❤️ Your words mean a lot! Take care, and I wish you a good day ahead
@hopebeyondpain, Hi! Congrats on your small victory. I am sure that the baby steps we are taking right now can help us in our path of recovery.
Anyway, I'm a bit late in answering this, but it doesn't matter. Lol. As for me, I have found a journal app that suits me. It's called Grid Diary. The format of the app looks like this::max_bytes(150000):strip_icc()/the-10-best-journal-apps-for-2018-4175848-6-5ba94978c9e77c0082c7b978.jpg)
I am terrible at writing an introduction, so a journal app with a set of questions to answer is a great way to give me an idea of what to write about. I also like the fact that you can customize the questions in this app.. :D
That's it.
Until next time,
Ham
@SnippyHam
Heya ❤️ Aww, thank you so much!
Wow, this looks like a cute and thoughtful journal - I'll have to give it a shot. I'm so glad to hear that you found something that works for you ❤️ Thank you for joining us (it's never too late!), take care, and I hope you'll have a good day ahead ❤️
@SnippyHam
Hi SnippyHam,
That is so neat that you knew how and got that cool pic of it in there!!!!! So glad that this journal app is working well for you. 
SnippyHam, can you get this on a laptop? I would be intersted in looking this over and trying it. Thanks for sharing about this.
@Amelia2324, Hi!
I checked the website of Grid Diary, and found out that their app is available for a particular type of laptop - macOS
As for Window users like me, it's possible to run Grid diary by downloading an android emulator like Bluestacks.
- Ham
@hopebeyondpain walking
Wow, that's such a meaningful post! You give so much Hope! Thank you! 💚
Green.
I have been moving along on my Growth Path day by day