Support group for family trauma and abuse
Hello, I tried to talk to an anonymous person about abuse online. I couldn't find a chat for family abuse, so I waited to speak to someone at a domestic abuse hotline. They said they weren't trained in family abuse. Then I decided I might journal. I look for a journal and all I see are journals for domestic abuse, not family abuse. I am in full support of the domestic abuse advocacy and support. I completely understand relationships can be so messy. That being said, I really want a support group for family, so why not here? I recently figured out I had childhood and present trauma directly from my family and I don't know how to heal yet, but I can begin to understand myself better. Understanding that I've been through abuse validated me, it gave me peace and understanding. It also gave me guilt like, no one will believe me, maybe it's all in my head? What if everything is my fault? What if I am the problem? And I have to say, that is the trauma speaking. But enough about me, if you can relate, want to add your thoughts, opinions, or share you stories please join! Please share, let us help and validate each other and try to give each other the healing we might really need. <<I am not a trained professional nor is a trained professional a part of this, yet>> If any qualified person wants to join our chat, please do!
That's enough for now, I look forward to checking back in if you experience family abuse and want to share, welcome to the group!
@unassumingPeach6421. Trigger warning ⚠️
Family members can definitely be abusive. You are not alone and will be believed here. TW I experienced sexual, physical and emotional abuse by family members.
@adventurousBranch3786
I hate that you went through that experience but I am so glad that you are here. I wanted to start things off with a question, like a journal prompt.
Prompt #1. My greatest fear as a child was…
Thank you so much for joining 💙
My answer....being poisoned after I got bit by a potentially lethal spider when I played in a hollowed out tree. But I also was afraid of sounds being that I was on the spectrum and no one knew. I supported myself in the first part of life when I was trying to process my world.
@unassumingPeach6421. That must have been a vey frightening experience for you.
@adventurousBranch3786
At times, it was never so bad. It's just painful. I still cry and can't get through my day because noises are so painful, but I'm trying my best to fight through the pain and treat the symptoms when I need to. What about you? Do you have a memory of a fear, or something you loved?
@unassumingPeach6421 when you say sounds were painful, do you mean physically?
I survived family, school based abuse, and gas lighting directly connected to mental health - and just had a psychiatrist who didn't believe I have ptsd break me so in a horrible place right now -I'm not sure he believes after I ended up in fetal position on the floor- but it doesn't matter I'm so broken - 30 years of progress gone.
I need a support group and to be able to talk with a group that understands trauma- logically that would be the trauma chat room - but it's rarely open and it's only scheduled chats are for DiD - I get that DiD can come from trauma - but if that isn't our space then where are we supposed to go?
I feel guilty being triggered in rooms for other issues.
I need my broken people - hugs.
@IndigoWhisper.
The trauma chat room is supposed to be opened on the weekends. I don’t see it open today(Saturday). Hopefully it will be open on Sunday.
For me, family mistreatment has no solution
@unassumingPeach6421 Next topic: Subtle abuse.
I think subtle abuse can be a thing. Family members speaking about you badly when you're not there, not being invited or included in something, body shaming, treating you like you're a burden, giving harsh nicknames, being overly critical, etc. These things happen and it's just life, but when criticism and mistreatment becomes a pattern, and when you speak up nothing changes maybe it's abuse? I was told not to pursue my dreams and my parents told me not to go to college. Years later my dad told me that what I was pursuing was actually perfect for me and he realized it was a great idea. He never trusted me to make my own decisions and it always left me second guessing myself. My mom growing up took my things without asking. When we argued she just took my stuff she took back gifts. I felt like nothing was mine. It all left me with this sense of helplessness like nothing was mine and I wasn't in control. It's a powerful thing to talk about as I'm trying to take control of my own life. I'm scared of making decisions and being yelled at by someone who decides I can't think for myself. I'm glad most of the time now, there is no one like that standing in my way, but I'm happy to have help from time to time. Does anyone have any other stories of subtle abuse?
