Traumatic Experiences Community Check In - Monday 3rd September 2018
It's Monday everyone & for some people, Happy Labor Day! ❤️
I really like this picture above and wanted to share it with everyone. I find it simple, inviting, peaceful, and relaxing....all equaling REST." Can you re-read this last sentence?! Now imagine if YOUR life could somehow have those elements. What would rest look like for you? Would it be laying down burdens? Admititng pain? Or taking a step forward to start a change? I am stuck with the fact that rest actually seems to require action from us. Werid! But true. In order to find rest, we either have to do something, or not do something. For me, I give my burdens to Jesus. I come to the Bible to find rest ... and then that encourages me to take action. The more I'm able to engage in therapy with my counselor, the more I find rest inside of me. ❤️ This place is YOURS to share whatever you want! What ways do you find rest? What could rest look like for you? Thinking of you all today!!! Safe Hugs!
@KLM3278
Hey KLM. Thanks for posting the check in today. Rest would be great.
Somtimes I feel like this
And what I really need is this
Hope you have a good day.
@practicalIdeal2007
Ohhhhhh Hahahhahahaha!!! Yes!!!!! I actually did blow bubbles on Sunday!!! I was teaching preschool aged kids at church Sunday school. We always start with them jumping up and trying to get the bubbles! It brings them SO much joy!!! And it brings me joy to!!!! Can you maybe stop that running and instead, blow some bubbles!!!!!' ❤️❤️
@KLM3278 Rest is really important and we all should remember to do it more often!
I want to share my progress with you. I'm currently on a train -and one of my abusers is on the same one. I don't think he noticed me, as I made sure to keep space between us, but I mean I'm on the same train. Only months ago I would not have entered this train, not for the sake of Christ. But here I am. I feel powerful. I feel strong. What if he noticed me, I ask myself. Well, then he does! He can't do something to me. cameras are everywhere, the train is packed! I'm safe.
I wish everyone the best!
@sincerePark336
WOW!!! This is progress! No, he cannot hurt you!! You are safe!!! You are strong!!!!! It must be hard to know he is on that train with you, but to be able to write this, shows you are not allowing him to have control over you. He is not incontrol... YOU ARE! And you are strong!!!! And you are safe!!!!! ❤️❤️
@sincerePark336
Wow Park, that is great progress. Not letting him have that control, not letting him decide what train you can take. You are safe and you are strong, this is awesome!
@KLM3278 this is what im figuring out with the grief im enduring with the loss of my mum which has me traumatised and then my dog not long after i havent quite reached the rest bit yet im always breaking into tears as i shared not long ago im past the acceptance and feeling the feelings phase i feel adjusting and moving foward is the bit im at which is the rest bit but right now its a struggle for me
@NevaehRose
It is a struggle. But you are not alone!!! You need to know it's okay to feel whatever it is you need to feel. There is no time frame for grief. ❤️❤️ Go ahead and cry. We are all here for you!❤️
I wish I could be on this porch with a thick blanket and somebody holding my hand while I cry myself into sleep.
@Coly
Ohhhh me to!!! ❤️Here is a soft blanket and teddy bear!!🐻 Try closing your eyes. We are here on the porch, quietly sititng next to you. Go ahead and cry. A gentle breeze just started to blow. And it is slowly rocking you. Go ahead and cry some more!! You are safe! You are loved! You are not alone!❤️
for me rest would be both being able to physicaly rest (I need sleep) but also be able to rest my anxieties and be able to calm down.
@KLM3278
I took a lot of actions so I could better after I hit rock bottom about a year ago. I'd like to think that I'm better now, I know I'm okay. But trying to figure out how to be okay. My issues started at a very young age, so this is the first time I've truly been okay. It's so confusing! What do okay people do? How often should they feel sad? Do I ignore what happened to me or do I embrace it? In the big picture, what I'm trying to figure out is nothing compared to what I used to be trying to figure out. It almost sounds silly. Do I let it happen naturally or do I put forth an effort? Being okay doesn't make much sense to me, but I know someday it will.
@theindigojournal
I'm SO glad you're feeling better after hitting rock bottom. ❤️ It sounds like you have worked hard and made a lot of progress! You ask yourself a lot of goos questions!!! Can I ask if you are working with a counselor? They maybe able to help you answer some of those questions. ❤️❤️ I'm not sure how it all works either, but I agree that sometimes it is hard to know what is "ok" and when does it become "not ok" again? Because is there supposed to be a normal level of everything? Does all the scary bad stuff just disappear?? I think about this to sometimes. My counselor always tells me there is nothing "wrong" with me. There are things that have happened to me, but it didn't make me bad or wrong. It hurt me. And we are leanring to trust again and think different and know that there is hope and that things can change. But it's at my own pace. And this is ok!!! ❤️❤️
You are also okay!!!! ❤️❤️❤️❤️
I love the rocking chairs bit
It's hard for me to simply relax. . .
I constantly have at least ten things in my mind. . . I don't even sleep well.
@Rebekahwriter13
Safe Hug!! Yes, I think we all do. I do! It's really a battle to find the rest and sleep...oh, my! Sleep is really hard. I'll be doing good and then I'll take steps backwards and can't do anything but lay there awake staring at the ceiling with my mind racing and feeling like i'm 5 years old and so scared. Then other times, its grown up thoughts racing in my head about money and my apartment and work stuff. So, basically, I guess I'm just saying I understand. ❤️ So, what can we do? What do you try doing to help yourself? Do you ever talk to your counselor about these things? ❤️
@KLM3278
I've been to 2 therapists, one kept pushing a job, but I have energy issues.the second one kept saying most are my issues are hormonal.
My main thoughts in no particular order. . .
1. Are my family ok? My mom has her health issues. My dad side of he family still not talking to me. . . But I still think of them. My brother health issues.
2. When can we have our own space? (My mom, brother and uncle live in a motel, and it's very crowded and not as fun as like the show my name is earl.)
3. I can't work, and a few doctor will write notes, but government facilities will not count it. (Stupid president killed that.)
4. I can't work, I can't sleep right. I go to bed tired, I wake up tired. No one wants me to use those 5 hour vitamins shots, but it's the only way I can function for errands.
5. Why can't I have a cat? Cats help my anxiety, especially petting them when they purr.
6. I can't lost weight due to hormones I'm taking and bad sleep issues. The body needs to be balanced and get right sleep in order to function correctly.
7. I'm going to scream if I get more doctor thinking all of my health problems are based on me being overweight. I can't work so I can't buy decent groceries.
8. I can go from sweet to bitter and mean. I'm also losing he filter of saying things especially when I'm flustered. My family know I'm honest, but they call me the bear. I'm afraid to date because it's bad to snap for no reason in the middle of a date. I dont know all of my triggers. I know it's hormonal, and my doctors don't seem to care.
9. Because of weight I feel I'm ugly and not worthy. . . My doctors or media do not help my self esteem.
10. My energy versus my writing. I love to write, but my lights and computers keep breaking. . . I feel like fates are against me writing, why God, why?
There are more problems but these are the main issues that constantly boil in my head.
@Rebekahwriter13
Thank you for sharing these. I can see why they boil in your head. It is a lot to handle and figure out. Is there a way to make the issues easier to tackle? I'm also overweight. Talking about it triggers me. I know how hard it all is, believe me I do. I have health issues also and they prevent me from being able to exercise. But I also know I need to exercise. For this struggle, can you try one small change that you feel good about? It can be a small one. Like, no white bread. Or no alcohol. Or trying to eat 1 apple 🍎 everyday? Or one I'm trying to do - drink 8 glasses of water everyday. ❤️ The job thing seems like it would be difficult. Here is a safe hug if you want one ❤️ Is there a way to maybe find a part-time job? Or even a job thats a few hours a week? Just brain storming ❤️ I understand your health makes everything harder. I want to encourage you!! Maybe you can start to feel more incontrol if you can look at your list and try small changes before bigger ones?Keep trying though!!!! I know you are a strong person. You can keep going and keep reaching out here for support! Because believe me, you are not alone!!!
@KLM3278
I can barely find energy for chores. I've passed out from over work before likely I was at home.
I don't drink or smoke.
I try to drink water or tea in between my coffee and soda. I'm trying cut back by drying diet soda.
I'm trying to walk multi times a week.
@Rebekahwriter13
It sounds like you are doing lots of good things. Try to not beat yourself up over what you cannot do. Maybe try celebrating what you can do! And it sounds like you are doing some good things. And we know it all is hard to do when you're exhausted. I hope today will be a good day. ❤️
@KLM3278
My mom is down just had surgery, my brother can only do so much with his amputee leg, and my uncle works.,. . I'm the only one who can do all of the chiresright now
@Rebekahwriter13
I understand and you are doing alot. Try and remember to somehow also take care of you to! You're doing a great job for everyone else ❤️❤️ How is your mother feeling? ❤️
@KLM3278 Mom is sore but ok.
@KLM3278
Chores, sorry typo.
I try to donthinks for my health, but I need caffeine just to keep up
@Rebekahwriter13
Me to! LOVE coffee! 😃