Profile Pics on 7Cups - Staying Safe Online
Hey Everyone!
Misty Here!
I am writing this discussion post because of the importance of choosing the safest profile picture that you can!
This applies equally to members and listeners.
I am a mentor here at 7Cups and part of the welcoming team too so I have a lot of new listeners and members that contact me.
Sadly a lot of these people that are new to 7Cups have problems caused by their profile pictures, that could easily be avoided.
We all know that it is very important to stay anonymous on 7Cups and one area that we need to be careful about is choosing the right picture.
I know that there are threads that have already been written, one in fact was written almost 4 years ago to the day but the internet has changed since then. We all know about internet safety, or we think we do! But do we really?
Basically remember that anything posted online stays online.
So let's use that and discuss profile pictures and how to choose a safe one?
Q. What is a 'safe display picture'
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A picture that cannot be traced.
Did you know that it is possible to take a picture and trace it back to where it came from?
So please, think about that for a moment.
Do you really want some internet stalker turning up outside your the front door of your home?
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A picture that does not reveal your true identity
Imagine that you share your true mental health problems and then your boss reads your thread
and sees the picture and recognises you?
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A picture that has not been used anywhere else on the internet ever!
You take a lovely selfie and post it to your social media accounts. You are proud of it. You want everyone to see how beautiful you are and how clever at taking selfies. You use it as your profile picture on 7Cups and then start sharing about your problems with your relationship, next thing you know your whole family recognise the picture and know all about your personal problems.
Q. But I want to show how attractive I am, lots of other people show their faces why shouldn't I?
💡You can of course! In fact a lot of 7Cups guidelines appear to encourage the use of a face picture! (but perhaps those suggestions should carry safety warnings or be amended to reflect the current state of internet safety). However, please bear in mind all the points above and then also these:-
❌Sometimes people join us here and they are bullies or unkind people and they like to target those that are new or inexperienced.
They will look at the picture and maybe even actively seek out people to target.
Choosing an anonymous picture can help to limit the possibility of this happening.
Instead of a young blonde female they see a picture of a daisy or a cat.
Instead of an attractive male they see a picture of a wolf.
⭐For New Listeners in particular- consider this point whilst you gain experience of handling different chat scenarios. Do you really need to have a pretty picture and your gender in your profile, and say you will listen to anything? Wouldn't you rather know that those things weren't why you were contacted?
Q. If this is all true then surely this applies to ALL pictures we post on 7Cups then?
✅YES YES YES! posting pictures of our own dogs or cats or Christmas tree can leave us all open to taunting, personal attacks, bullying or worse, tracking and stalking.
Q. Ok, so if it applies to all pictures what about other details in our profiles? Are they safe?
- We all need to take responsibility for our own safety online.
- Any details we give should still allow us to remain anonymous, so please think carefully.
- Giving some personal details may help people reach out to you because of shared experiences but also they may attract the wrong people and unwanted attention.
- People often think that they are safe if they only give out tiny bits of information here and there but that adds up and up and up.
Q. So what can I do if something goes wrong? How do I get help here?
- 7 Cups works hard to keep everyone safe.
- There are three Community Managers @Heather225 @ASilentObserver @Hope
- You can email community@7cups.com
- You can change your profile in your Settings (use the browser version www.7cups.com then top right profile settings)
Safety is Your Responsibility Too!
Profile Picture Policy changed October 14th 2019 see This Thread
Listening .... One Step At A Time
@MistyMagic
Thank you for sharing! This is very important :)
@MistyMagic Wonderful information. Everyone must read this and follow it. This is not just for 7Cups , but for all other websites too. Stalkers and everywhere. and the more we make our personal life public, the more we are vulnerable. So let's take some time to think before posting anything anywhere.
Once again thanks for taking your time and writing this post
@MistyMagic THIS should be compulsory reading for everyone here. Thanks, MistyMagic!
When is this going to be changed?:
"Please choose a head shot (picture of your face), nature scene, art/symbol/image (i.e, Hope), or animal. Please do not include pictures of famous people, sexually suggestive pics, or cartoon pics. You must be fully clothed in your picture. The goal of the picture is to express warmth, compassion, and kindness. Images must be in JPG, GIF or PNG format and less than 5MB. Thank you!"
Thanks everyone for sharing your views!
I am really pleased so many of you have taken the time to pm me and respond here, so thank-you.
I was going to add the exact wording that our new listeners face when they first join because it suggests using a face pic, as I feel that maybe for new joiners isn't that really a little irresponsible?
I realise that 7Cups couldn't add a disclaimer underneath either, although there are other disclaimers around.
I am not scaremongering.
These problems are real.
They exist.
They happen every week here.
I am just trying to provide information about how everyone, but importantly how new listeners and new members can stay safer online. My personal view is that perhaps only admins and ambassadors should be able to have face shots. Or maybe those that have been here a long time and are strong enough and experienced enough. After all, we are supposed to be anonymous aren't we?
But I am not talking about hiding, or not taking a risk. I am talking about taking responsibility for your own safety online!
Let's have a look at a few real experiences -
- Some of the people I talk to here are being hurt badly. They use 7Cups to seek support anonymously. Sometimes the person that is hurting them takes their phone and then finds their 7Cups account and then MistyMagic. Why would I want my picture giving them a clue to who I am or what I am or where I am?
- A new member is getting harassed because her old boyfriend tracked her down by searching where her pictures were being used.
- A new listener gets accused of being robotic and not real so she adds a picture. Now she gets unwanted sexual conversations, and ends up crying and leaves in distress.
But I am trying to enlighten, not dishearten.
Those of us that have been at 7Cups any length of time will have come across these problems and will have already made an informed decision.
So if I have helped just one person stop and think, or maybe spread this information about being safer online then I feel that will have done a good job.
Listening .... One Step At A Time
I agree this should be updated.
@Phthalo
Be the change you wish to see in the world.
@Blaze i think it should be changed also instead of saying what it should be just say what it should not be take out the beginning where it says " Please choose a head shot (picture of your face), nmbol/image (i.e, Hope), or animal. " and just say what the picture should not be ... " should not be a picture of a famous person a cartoon character .... ( and then there is room to add " if its a photo make sure its not located anywhere else on the internet " or "should not be a photo located anywhere else online" ) and really before anyone can add a picture even a picture of their cat i think they should read this thread so they can make an informed decision and know the risks would it be so difficut to frovide a link to this thread in settings or a link to some info page with this information on it and include something about it in new listener training? and more visable to members maybe this info should be in newbie hub also ( i started a thread in teen zone yesterday talking about this and linking to this thread) it can be more visible it is important that everyone reads this
@MistyMagic Wonderful, well organized post! It is outstanding how much of an influence profile pictures/ display pictures can have especially in regards to internet safety. I sadly realized that the hard way when I first joined 7Cups. Thanks for sharing, and keep up the great work! :)
@MistyMagic Thanks for this article. In addition to what you wrote, I think listeners should have the choice to not display the country that they are from.
@MistyMagic
Thanks for this post! There was a listener whose profile pic was a pic of cleavage...and the profile was around for several days! Haven't seen it lately though.