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Negative Experiences and Criticisms

MeaningfulSilence September 12th, 2023

Hello everyone!

Welcome to Negative Experiences and Criticisms thread!

This is a space where you can join and share your negative experience with Faith.

Please remember to be respectful of everyone's belief ๐Ÿ’™

HERE you can find the Community Guidelines


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Sunisshiningandsoareyou September 12th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence

Fantastic idea on creating this space for people to share about their negative experiences, thank youu, Silenceee, you've been doing awesome in managing support within the community! ๐Ÿ’—

Kindness first, always! ๐Ÿค—

1 reply
MeaningfulSilence OP September 12th, 2023

@Sunisshiningandsoareyou

Hi there Sun! ๐ŸŒป

Hope it can be useful, thank you for your post ๐Ÿ’™

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Tinywhisper11 September 12th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence I've shared a negative experience๐Ÿ˜ฅ I was owned and a slave to a Christian cult I was born into. It was more of a satanic cult. And I was lucky law stepped in and rescued some of the slaves.

but positive, because I understand now those people were not real christians. And although I don't have a specific rligion. I do believe in God and angels โค

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MeaningfulSilence OP September 12th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11

Hello there Tinywhisper11, how are you today?

Sorry to hear about that, it sounds to be a really traumatic experience, heavy to deal with. ๐Ÿ˜”

I hope you are now in a safe place and that you can experience positive human interactions, to help you thinking that not everyone is bad.

I also hope that you have/had a good support system that can help you process what you experienced.

Feel free to join the forum area to share and see that we won't leave you alone ๐ŸŒป

Sending you good vibes ๐Ÿ’™

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Tinywhisper11 September 12th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence thankyou โค

4 replies
MeaningfulSilence OP September 12th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11

You are welcome Tiny!

...and how are you today?

How is your week going?

Any plans you feel to share?

If not it's ok, I am here when you want to post ๐Ÿ˜Š

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Tinywhisper11 September 12th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence I'm doing ok โค I'm in a lot of pain right now. Stupid back. But last year I learned all about different holidays and celebrations๐Ÿ˜ and Halloween is coming up. So I'm making my own Halloween decorations ๐Ÿ˜ it's difficult cause my owners broke my spine and it's not completely fixable. And also half of my fingers were cut off. But I've been working really hard and I think I'm doing really well โค

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MeaningfulSilence OP September 12th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11

... difficult to share a smile in this post after knowing about what you went through.... but probably you need my strength not my tears, Tiny.

I'm glad you are planning on something you like. Hope you will enjoy making the decorations and let me know how you made them and how they look like! ๐ŸŽƒ ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ‚

Take care ๐Ÿ’™

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Tinywhisper11 September 14th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence today is not going so well๐Ÿ˜ž I'm depressed feeling lost, I'm a freak, and thinking bad thoughts rn๐Ÿ˜ข

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LoveMyMoonflowers September 14th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11

*offers safe huggles for Lola*

hug-day.gif

mytwistedsoul September 14th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11 You are not a freak dear Tiny โค๏ธ Is there anything we can do to help to ease those bad thoughts? *Offers safe gentle hugs* โค๏ธ

slowdecline48 September 15th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11 What's wrong with being a freak? Being normal is rather overrated, to be honest with you... But seriously, take deep breaths & know that we all wish the best for you here.

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mytwistedsoul September 12th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence My relationship with God is complicated. I was born a monster and a bad soul - punishment was needed so I got right with God. He could see my soul and knew I would go to *** otherwise. I used to pray though to be saved. Then there was the youth minister - he went to jail for awhile


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MeaningfulSilence OP September 12th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Hi there Soul!

Thank you for having shared, it's surely difficult to open up about negative feelings and bad experiences.

I think nobody is perfect and we all eventually need God's mercy, sorry to hear you see yourself so negatively.

You mentioned to have prayed to ask forgiveness, so if I got it right, you still are willing to have a path into Faith. Hopefully the negative person you encountered won't cause you to lose your Faith, if it's still something important for you. I wish you to experience inner peace and acceptance because you deserve to see yourself from a different perspective and not just through " sins lens".

Sending you good vibes ๐Ÿ’™



4 replies
mytwistedsoul September 13th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence Please don't think me rude. I was a kid. I begged for forgiveness and prayed to be saved. From my parents - my situation. I think I lost faith a long time or maybe I never really truly had any to begin with? There was fear I guess more than anything? Fear that God would see - he would tell her. I'm sorry I don't want to get too deep here

I am open to the idea of faith and God. I think it's amazing that people can be comforted with prayer and the thoughts that there is a higher power who loves them unconditionally
Thank you for your kind reply โค๏ธ
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MeaningfulSilence OP September 13th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

Hi Soul ๐Ÿ’™

I think that fear is one of the worst sensations we can experience. I hope that in your adulthood you have been supported to process all the negative you had to deal with.

I think that nowadays it'd be important that you care for yourself and surround yourself of positive things and good relationships. You deserve to choose what is best for you, something that gives you more inner peace. It doesn't need to be what others think to be better, it needs to be something that helps your wellbeing. Which is always personal.

I'm here if you want to talk, sending you my best wishes and be safe! A big hug if accepted ๐Ÿค—


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mytwistedsoul September 13th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence Thank you โค๏ธ

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MeaningfulSilence OP September 13th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul

You are welcome ๐Ÿ˜Š ๐Ÿ’™

Tinywhisper11 September 15th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul gives you a giant tiny hug โคโคsqueezes you tightly โค I also didn't believe I was a real human๐Ÿ˜ž but we are sweetie, we always were. I'm sorry sweetie. I love you โค

mytwistedsoul September 16th, 2023

@Tinywhisper11 I've tried to write you a reply earlier so many times but nothing wants to come out right. I'm so sorry that you've had similar beliefs ๐Ÿ˜ž *gives you a safe bear hug* Thank you โค๏ธ much love to you Tiny


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AffyAvo September 12th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul Did you just believe in the past that you were born a monster and a bad soul or is this something you still believe?

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mytwistedsoul September 13th, 2023

@AffyAvo Affy โค๏ธ This is a belief I still struggle with. I've been trying to work on it but it's rooted pretty deep inside

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AffyAvo September 13th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul I'm sorry that religion was used to stifle your spirit when you were young. Regardless the faith in the home, the one kids are brought up with I fully believe all deserve to hear they are deserving and worthy of love. I offer hugs to the current you and hugs to the young you labelled a monster and they are available whenever you feel comfortable. ๐Ÿ’—

1 reply
mytwistedsoul September 13th, 2023

@AffyAvo Thank you โค๏ธ

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slowdecline48 September 14th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul I don't know you in real life so I probably don't have much to work with...but from what I've seen of you in the forums, thus far I must disagree. No, you are not a monster.

I've met some truly monstrous people in my life, Soul. You don't seem anything like them.

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mytwistedsoul September 15th, 2023

@slowdecline48 Thanks Slow - I really appreciate you saying that

And @AffyAvo your reply really touched me

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AffyAvo September 15th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul I'm really glad. I see you having such compassion for so many here. I know the deep past hurts won't entirely vanish but I hope with the work you are doing you can pull out those deep roots and fill them with love.

mytwistedsoul September 16th, 2023

@AffyAvo I've tried to find the words to show my gratitude but I can't seem to find the right words. Thank you Affy โค๏ธ this means a lot to me *safe gentle bear hugs to you*

AffyAvo September 18th, 2023

@mytwistedsoul @mytwistedsoul When you came back around after a bit saying my replay touched you, I knew

I'm wishing you the best with your healing journey! Hugs! ๐Ÿ’—

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slowdecline48 September 14th, 2023

I am old enough to remember 9-11, for one. For those of us who were around on that day of infamy, it affected us all. I was on pins & needles for the next 48 hours after that...lived in San Francisco at the time & I figured the next attack would be on the TransAmerica pyramid downtown. It is a famous landmark & a symbol of American wealth & power, no less than the Twin Towers were. Thus it would be a suitable target.

I could go into my experience for over two years prior to 9-11, as my alma mater (a false term in this case) was & is one of the most antizionist & antisemitic universities in the US. I could go into certain attacks at synagogues in the 2010's, one mass shooting at an army base, as well as assaults on black-hatters in Brooklyn--until recently, it was considered our American stronghold. I could sum up my research into the doctrines, scriptures, & history of a certain religion that connects so many of these outrages together, & how it makes so many of its believers our implacable enemies--as I experienced firsthand, both in reality & on (anti)social media, multiple times.

I could tell you all of the above. But I won't because I can't do it without violating the rules of this subcommunity. I know because I read the thread for mods a few minutes ago.

So what can I say? Just this: it is one of the ironies of my life that I get along better with Christians, as they are people of a faith that, while it is somewhat related to the one I come from, it's also very different indeed. How the world turns! ๐Ÿ˜

RedStar01 September 18th, 2023

@MeaningfulSilence

May I suggest we change the title to Insightful Experiences and Analytical Thoughts so the focus is a bit more on the Quality of Thought to transform the relative value some may be experiencing into a more positive learning experience which can often be gained by changing ones Mental Inclination.

I also like to share one of my insights into how we can all gain a great advantage over our mental faculties by thinking a bit more seriously how to make our own Thought Processes more flexible so we can actually understand a bit more clearly our potential to do better Mind Development work ourselves by removing some of our unrealistic thoughts: "... anything is possible contrary to the limitations imposed on the real world by nature!"

Removing irrational thinking has helped me to feel better and make me more confident to have a better grasp on reality by applying a bit more critical and analytical self-discory into my daily thought formation process.

I'm sure it can possibly help many others to convert negative feelings into positive, constructive ideas which may turn into a better understanding of how you can keep working on expanding your mental faculties in a progressive direction for yourself and others to gain better mental health by better applying your own intellectual resources.

Best wishes to all ...

slowdecline48 September 27th, 2023

On a somewhat more personal note (9-11 was personal & a significant factor in forming my position re Islam): I was told that I was destined for H.e.ll after I discard my mortal coil because I hadn't accepted Jesus as my personal savior. This happened indirectly the first time, when I tagged along with my then-girlfriend to a local "Bible study"* group. The second time was when a fanatical acquaintance at the time warned me about it over the phone...I dropped him like a hot brick not long after that. The third time was a few weeks ago & quite indirectly in a personal convo. The guy I was talking with is not a judgmental person & didn't mean it that way, but I read the subtext easily enough. (Have read the gospels & some of Paul's letters so I'm familiar with the basic creed, though I still can't make sense of it)

I must add that I do not have a bad opinion of Christianity overall. The above experiences aren't the only dealings I've had with members of Jesus's fan club. Have met quite a few in my life so far; with few exceptions, they were decent folk. A few of them were wonderful human beings. I've seen how living a Christian life has helped a great many people & given them meaning & joy. It certainly looks nice when I see it in action that way... If I could make that "leap of faith" & didn't have philosophical issues with faith itself, I would consider joining a suitable church.



*note the quotes. Having attended three Bible study groups in two states so far, I can say with a fair degree of confidence that what happens in such groups is not "study". It certainly isn't scholarship by any standard with which I'm familiar. Admittedly I am biased as I've always had a reading habit, earned a bachelor's & am familiar with basic research techniques for the writing of essays, as well as the more common logical fallacies.

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@slowdecline48 I wasn't sure if I actually believed it adn I tried to create and maintain a relationship with god and stuff. but he just didnt seem interesting enough. he didnt respond like humans would. you have to play mind games to see if he likes or accepts your behavior adn its not for lack of trying. I did try a lot. (im also assuming that you are exchristian)

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slowdecline48 Thursday

@goldenFriend9441 *lol* No, I've never been a Christian of any stripe. I am familiar with the basic creed & have read parts of the NT here & there, + studied a lot of religious history...Christianity is part of the roots of Western civilization, for sure.

Personally I was raised as a Jew, though an assimilated one. I went through a hard-core atheist phase, explored other major faiths & wrestled with the one serious problem that all the monotheisms have: the existence of evil & suffering of the innocent. Epicurus said it succinctly well over 2,000 years ago. I read &/or heard every major attempt at theodicy, & found all of them lacking. A few years ago I finally settled into agnosticism. Sure it's not much of a conclusion...but it is the most logical stance I can adopt.

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slowdecline48 October 26th, 2023


A high-ranking leader in Hamas issued a call for war. This statement was released at the same time as the attack on southern Israel. Meanwhile, protests have been staged in several American cities where the marchers clearly picked the side of Hamas. Speakers blamed Israel as the sole cause of the whole conflict.ย 

Does anyone remember when "globalize the intifada!" was a trendy catchphrase? It wasn't that long ago, folks...

This is not the first bad experience I've had with Islam, not by a long shot.

The whole Israel-vs-Hamas situation has my back hair up now. It dredges up quite a few things in my memory, particularly the experience of my people in the various caliphates from the initial invasions in the 7th century up to WW1, when the Ottoman empire fell apart. The conflict also brings to mind one protest in NYC where the protestors chanted about a town in Arabia where people lost their lives.ย 

I'm trying to be fair-minded here, I swear.ย However, I must admit that I sometimes feel uneasy when I see someone wearing a hijab, and I may have concerns when I see a mosque in the West.ย If an incident occurs in which a Jewish person is subjected to violence or harm, and it is determined that someone with extremist views is responsible due to the current situation, I would find it deeply concerning but sadly not unexpected. Itย certainly wouldn't be the first attack of its kind within CONUS--or outside it.

Are these thoughts bad? Unfair, maybe? Perhaps. But I can only judge from the experiences I've had & the knowledge I've gained so far. If someone can show me a more benevolent side of Islam or a place under Muslim rule where I can go about my business without being a 2nd-class citizen, then I'm all ears/eyes.

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Aayla Saturday
@slowdecline48 People all over the world are merely calling for peace and justice for the Palestinians being massacred - for more than a year now - and whose lands are being constantly stripped from them, and who had to face repression every time their tried to protest, even peacefully. There's much more to this story than October 7th 2023, there's a long history I encourage you to look up. Palestinians, in Gaza and the West Bank, are struggling to defend their own homes and very existence although they have little support and basic resources to even feed and medicate themselves. It is only fair, for both Muslims and other people, to support their struggle. That being, of course acts of blatant antisemitism where a person is attacked for just being a Jew have to be condemned, of course. At the same time, it's not fair to depict Muslims as a violent group as a whole, just as it's not fair to presume every Jew supports Israel's policies.
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slowdecline48 Saturday

@Aayla ๐Ÿฅฑ I've heard it all before. I also know the parts you left out...conveniently.

To include everything you left out in the saga would be more than almost anyone on here would read, but I'll include a few choice tidbits:

  1. The Israeli government has made offers for peaceful coexistence several times. Every time, the offer was refused or ignored & the Palestinian leadership turned to chaos & terrorism, from before Arafat's leadership of the PLO to now. The current war wouldn't have happened if the Palestinians had picked the smart option, but they didn't. Not even once.
  2. As an example of the foregoing, Israel withdrew from Gaza in 2005 & forcibly uprooted over 12,000 of its own people from there. (Yes, there were Jews in Gaza... particularly its northern part) The expectation was the Palestinians would set up their own government & figure it out from there. A year later they elected Hamas into power, which was no surprise. Modern democracy emerged in the West, not the Near East. There are reasons for that.
  3. There's a difference between not supporting the Israeli government's policies & acting in favor of erasing Israel from existence...including annihilating &/or displacing all its people. Judging from your choice of words, you've either confused the two positions orย you are in favor of the 2nd option & deliberately hiding it. That also sums up the fringe groups of antizionist Jews & their "progressive" allies. Rest assured, the vast majority of Jews believe Israel has as much right to exist as any other nation, though of course opinions vary & not all approve of Netanyahu & co. (For the record, I'm not a fan of him either)

Also, no one is depicting Muslims in general as violent. No doubt most of them want the same things most people want: three square meals a day, a house with a roof that doesn't leak, a good-paying job, & freedom of conscience. But modern-day jihad is just the tip of the iceberg...an iceberg which includes inherent tendencies toward theocracy & an inability to regard those of other religions (or with no religion) as equal to themselves. Even a casual glance at Islamic history gives ample evidence...& my investigation was anything but casual.

Listen, I'd like it if a peace agreement came about & everyone in the region could figure out how to get along. It would be wonderful. But at this point, advocating for a two-state solution is sticking your head in the sand. It's just not going to happen. I don't think it was ever a real possibility, tbh.

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Aayla Saturday
@slowdecline48 if you just yawn at my words to mock me, especially when my words are about a massacre that is taking innocent lives at a higher rate than any ongoing conflict, there is no room for conversation and we're both wasting time. I'll read the rest of your words once you'll stop mocking mine.
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slowdecline48 Saturday

@Aayla If you read my words up to this point, then you already know where I stand. I know where you stand too...."The Palestinians are good & Israel is evil" sums it up.

slowdecline48 Saturday

Also, your deceptive statement on protests about the conflict has been duly noted. The motives include more than concern for the Palestinians when protestors chant things like "from the river to the sea" & "no two states! WE WANT ALL OF IT"...as has occurred many times, in several western nations, right after the 10-7 attacks. They got going suspiciously fast, too...normally it takes at least a couple days to assemble a movement & get everyone organized. These protests started right away.

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slowdecline48 October 27th, 2023

Interesting how my last post--which was written as honestly as my other ones here--mysteriously disappeared... As I said before about this forum, some ideas & feelings are more equal than others.ย ๐Ÿ˜’

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CheeryMango October 28th, 2023

Hello @slowdecline48. Sorry about the mixup with your post being deleted from this thread. Your post has been restored above for your convenience, however, it is important to recognize that individuals should not be judged based on the actions or statements of a few, and it is unfair to stereotype or hold preconceived notions about an entire group of people based on the actions of a few individuals or specific historical events.

It's essential to approach these issues with an open mind and not make assumptions about individuals based on their religion, ethnicity, or cultural background. The vast majority of Muslims are not involved in acts of violence, and it's important to promote understanding and dialogue rather than perpetuate stereotypes.

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slowdecline48 October 29th, 2023

@CheeryMango Yes, of course, I know all that... The thing is, I've attempted such productive dialogue before. More than once, in fact. But if the other party is not even willing to meet you halfway...ย ๐Ÿ˜”

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Jaeteuk November 30th, 2023

I was first introduced to Christianity back in 2007, from a family doctor. Back then, my depression was at its peak moments, and was told to go to church. That there were testimonies where people with depression go better after they put their faith in God. The other reason was to meet more people, expand my social circle. As someone who didn't attend University, I had no friends around my age. As people from work, were either much older than I or younger.

But the church I attended with my parents, none of the age groups were aligned with me. There are those of the same age, but were in University, none of them were drop-outs and went to work instead. So, I couldn't find a group that were in the same situation as I. Although I tried to join their fellowship group, not once did they made me feel welcome. Those people had known each other since they were young, and here I am, the outsider trying to fit in.

My parents ended up being baptized in the first church we attended, and I had never felt I was welcomed or was I able to fit in. Then, I ended up trying another church, where I was told there were more members who are working and that I might fit in more easily there. I somehow ended up in a fellowship group, met a couple of good people. Where we'd meet up outside of church for meals and chat for hours. But, I didn't get the guidance or support that I hoped for, in order for me put my trust in the faith itself. At one of the peak moments of my depression, where I was hospitalized, no one came to visit, and no one talked about it to me afterwards. No one came to do any preaching, it's like they didn't care what happens to me, nor do they wish I'd get better but putting my faith in Him.ย 

After this incident, we moved. My parents attended the sister church of the city we moved from. Although I tried attending their church here, joined a Bible Study group of people who are near my age (around 5-10 years older), but I still had unanswered questions, and I couldn't find anyone where I trusted enough to share my questions with. So, it's been at least a few years since I've attended church.

But, I'm glad my parents continued with it. In the current church, they met a group of friends, all retirees. So, my parents always have social events with them when they are in town (at the moment, most of them are out of town, gone back home to visit family who are sick).ย 

Now, I'm not sure if I'll ever attend church anymore. Sometimes, I feel that the lessons in the scriptures are all based on common sense. So, what's the point in learning about the faith? I tried attending yet another church, but I was like invisible to others. No one greeted me, no one welcomed me, so after going like 5 times. I stopped.ย