Bedroom Troubles

Having a personal preference about what you do with your own body isn't "doing something to" your husband, it's simply trying yourself with respect and not forcing yourself to do something that would ultimately just cause you to feel resentful because you didn't want to do it in the first place.

Seeing a sex therapist might help, especially since communicating is the key to any healthy relationship regardless of sex. Whether the cause is a difference in sex drives or perhaps a bed for greater emotional intimacy prior to physical intimacy, communicating will be the best way to start.

Best of luck!

@toricarey25 You may have a disorder called hypoactive sexual dedire diorder. If you haven't already seen your doctor about this you really should

@toricarey25

This situation must be frustrating for you both given the length of time you've both been married and how long it appears that each of you have been suffering needlessly. I'm sure that you've both talked through this situation and tried to come up with a few compromises but perhaps to no avail - if you haven't expressed some of these thoughts to your partner it isn't a bad idea to bring it up. Communication in situations like these is paramount. Perhaps a first step might be to visit your doctor to rule out any medical reasons why this might be occurring - nothing wrong with getting a qualified medical opinion. If there aren't any medical reasons tied to this then perhaps @Topsy is right, a sexual therapist might be able to do some good for the both of you.

I think when we get married it's often thought as a natural process when the rings are exchanged that two people will see things similarly and have the same cravings, desires, and needs. I think for some couples, that reality slaps them pretty hard after the first two years of marriage. However, in your case 7! Perhaps your sex drive is different than his and that is a core issue - but between the medical verification and sexual therapy - perhaps there can be a bit of compromise between you both and maybe even a bit of peace when things even themselves out.