OUR ORIGINAL POETRY: Share It Here
Hello there everyone!
If you're reading this it means that you probably are quite fond of poetry and writing it to. This is a thread to post all and any poetry that you may have, be it happy, sad, angry or just silly. All styles are welcome (free verse, couplets, slam) and it would be great to have at least one poem up a day for all of us to enjoy together!!
Locked in a cage without a key
I am prisoner of my own mind
Feeling nothing but worthlessness
Trusting not even myself any more
I walked in happy and naive
But got suppressed and pushed
Pushed down until I couldn't see the sky
All I could see was anger, hatred, jealousy
So I blocked it out
Stopped trying to climb out of the pit
I had lost my love, lost my anchor, lost my life
Replaced them all with scars, regrets and nothingness
The rope is there, just above my head
But I have lost the strength to get up
And even if I did that rope is far too frayed
I am trapped in an unlocked room, an open doorway
I can't push my way through the fog
@CloudRider16 that was sooo beautiful
Ashes
Sit alone on a pile of ashes
Wonder how i got this far
I can't remember how it happened
it didn't matter after all
I was wasted and i couldn't see
I was turning round in circles
How could it be?
I didn't give my all just to end it here
In a dark alley way, alone.
I need some room to breathe
Think back before i lost my mind
So i can try and find a place to hide
Outside my mind.
@DearMySanity, this poem really struck me, although it's hard to explain why exactly.
One part that I especially admire is the paradoxical statement about trying to "find a place to hide / Outside my mind."
Because people usually try hide inside something, these lines leapt out at me. I had an image of a person trying to claw his way outside his own skull.
The last four-syllable line is solemn, rhythmic, and a little chilling. Well done.
@Annie thank you. I I wrote because at one point I realized that my mind wasn't safe, that my only true enemy was myself. I needed to escape the wreckage of my head, thus the ashes. I didn't want to hide inside the thing which was keeping me from success, from functioning properly. I would have died, scared and alone, with no one to help me.
I Fell in love
I fell in love
with a boy. Who had eyes so blue
and hair so blonde.
I fell in love.
I fell in love
with a girl. She had eyes that were brown
and hair that was too.
I fell in love.
I fell in love
with a feeling. It comes to me sometimes
when Im with those Im closest to.
I fell in love.
I fell in love
with a song. It rushed over me
drowning the thoughts in my head. Taking over.
I fell in love.
I fell in love
with a poem. It was sad
and for some reason, for some reason,
I fell in love.
I fell in love with a person.
I fell in love with who she was
and what she could do.
At last.
I fell in love with me.
@Katy2665, I love that the final discovery is love of your self. BRAVO
@Katy2665 "At last. I fell in love with me" :) beautiful!
Night
What a beautiful sight
Wonderous stars playing with my eyes
I can hold them between my fingers, yet they're much bigger in size
Oh how I love the night
A shooting star, better make a wish now
I wish this moment wouldn't have to end
In the night I find a trusted friend
If only it could last forever, sadly I don't know how
A few hours will pass and the sun will rise
Illuminating the Earth with bright light
Solemnly ending this beloved night
Leaving me to my demise
@Cheeney
wonderful I usually find rhyme poem contrived but this is not trite at all
wonderful
3rd line too long try to shorten it
perhaps I hold them between my fingers, despite their size
Demise? i prefer you live on - perhaps on of 2 ways to go
Leaving me to ponder my own demise
Leaving me to mourn its demise
if you dont like comments please tell me
@2genpoet Thank you!
I agree that the 3rd line could be shorter, but I kinda like it how it is.
The ending is open to interpretation. Personally I wrote it like that because I like the solitude of the night. When the sun rises people wake up, get ready for another day, slowly flooding the Earth. During night time it's nice and quiet.
I appreciate your comment and tips
@Cheeney
i am glad you are able to take my suggestions in the spirit they were given
no criticism meant
@Cheeney love this, simple and amazing. I could see it and feel it. ty for sharing.
@batman4485 Thank you for your comment, batman!
What is night but the absence of the day
As I sit by your bedside tonight
I hold a scarf out to the falling stars
To bring a little starshine your way
There can be no rainbows without a storm
As I watch over you tonight
My spirit collects leprechaun gold
To bring a few blessings your way
What is music but words stringed to a tune
As I keep guard for you tonight
I gather melodies of yore
To cast a little solace your way
There can be no life without living
As I am with you, now, tonight
I promise every struggle has meaning
You hold your own magic deep inside...
@heartfulMusic18 I love this!
@Cheeney yeyy! Thank you : )
@heartfulMusic18
hey i love this
but i would try to make a few changes
first of al,l ilove the beginning line of something defined by the without
so do the same for music - suggestion -music is a soul without its thought
also you are being intimate - casting your way - as in fishing is from afar too
distant - perhaps make it more intimate by saying casting my solace for you
also what is the Title?
it is wonderful
marty
@2genpoet I am so glad you liked it.. I will see what can be done for the music bit, I see what you are saying there. Cast my solace your way :) I don't title my scribbles.. would you want to suggest a title for this? Thank you for leaving your comments, I truly appreciate it.
@heartfulMusic18
Solace - ilove the word it makes a great title
cast has two meaning - to cast to throw away and to cast a spell in magic so what ever option you use has to make sure that you infer to the reader the magic context
Ergo Sum
The relatives who died in the war
have faded in and out of our lives.
Not alive, not even the littlest bit alive,
But then not dead,
Gone or lost in the war,
Maybe once or twice mentioned as dead or killed,
but this is stated
with such dispassion
that it seems not true.
But these wraiths neither alive nor dead
have a prevalence beyond persons here or gone.
So I am going to Auschwitz
to give them life,
to find them within the ledgers and the Lagers
within the piles of shoes,
within the ashes.
For you cannot be destroyed unless you were once alive.
So amongst the destruction I will prove their existence,
like a latter-day Descartes,
You were killed
therefore you were
and I will grieve.
@2genpoet Amazing!
@2genpoet, oh my . . .
There is a solemnity here, a gravitas.
"And I will grieve." A simple line with lovely rhythm.
The poem has a stateliness of a tolling bell . . . death knell.
@2genpoet The lines "like a latter-day Descartes,/ 'You were killed/ therefore you were' "
blew me away!
Keep your chin up little stargazer
At worlds above your own,
You are small but you are stardust
And that
@majesticSapphire Wow! Beautiful and Inspiring :)
@majesticSapphire,
This is lovely, absolutely lovely. I'd have read it to my son at bedtime every night, with a smile.
This is really something special.
@majesticSapphire
wonderfu[
the title is Stargazer of course - so put it there
why if - the stars are a wonder for us all
For every sun and solar flare
Is made up just like you,
They are a cause for wonder
And you, my sprite, are one too.
what do you think?
i love it
but i am having second thought
the original might be better =-
play around with it
@majesticSapphire
I really believe that this could be published, with lovely illustrations, as a children's book. I would buy it in a heartbeat!
Sure, my five-year-old wouldn't have understood all the meaning, but what child wouldn't adore the warmth, wonder, love, encouragement, and majesty expressed, together with truly beautiful, lyrical SOUNDS.
And they would deflinitely understand Be brave, little Stargazer. 
And all the moms and dads and grandparents and aunties and babysitters would get a lovely treat.
The Life of Death
A creature stood amidst the flowers
It had a sorrowful expression
He was known for his strange powers
The ones that emit depression
Surely those beautiful flowers withered
Fell into the arms of Death one by one
All around warnings were whispered
Better stay away from him, he's the devil's son
Death pretended not to care
It was easier that way
And although it wasn't fair
Alone Death grew gray
He was cursed right from the start
His existence was one of sorrow
Truly he had a big heart
Yet everyday he wished not to see tomorrow
Why must everything I touch die
I didn't ask for this
Never am I greeted with a 'Hi'
Instead they always hiss
Stay away you evil monster
You have no place here
Leave you giant imposter
You will not find a home near
Death withdrew in solitude
The pain cut through him like a knife
Forever he'll be viewed
As the enemy of life
(inspired by this wonderful video)
@Cheeney That's amazing! !!!! I love it!!!!
@AB28 Thank you so much!
@Cheeney Ohhhhhhh thank you for the wonderful writing and the wonderful video... I have cursed him with all my heart so many times and this... I cant believe I actually felt for him!
@heartfulMusic18 Thank you for your comment! Yeah the video really amazed me because it brought a completely different perspective to the table and it was extremely thought provoking. Makes for good writing material
Noice
Make my bed feel much too small
Push me towards the edge
Keep me awake
With your incessant rustling
Leave my pillow
Smelling of shampoo
With a hint of cologne
And a whiff of you
Jump as my cold feet
Creep up your calves
To rest in the crook
Behind your bent knees
Wake me up
With musty kisses and bleary eyes
Laugh at my crazy morning hair
And listen as I grumble over your snoring
Sigh and curl an arm around me
Play the waiting game
To see who will first leave this nest
To turn the coffee pot on
And invited the day in
Grin in that easy-going way of yours
And let me revel in the fact
That I wake up every day
In this Elysium
@CourageDearHeart
oh my
oh my
Each detail, small & real & lovely
The combination is a knock out.
Elysium indeed.
@CourageDearHeart
Wonderful - I am so jealous of you
except for the cold feet
Popsicle toes- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3VGZ6M6t4vA
i feel the simple joys of the relationship
but i would consider leaving out the last line
and perhaps just calling the poem Morning Elysium
let the reader feel the joy by himself like i did
dont shove it his face
@2genpoet
Ahhh that's a great idea. Thanks for the constructive criticism! And don't be jealous I don't have a lover right now, just really good at thinking romantically.
@CourageDearHeart aaahhh :) This makes a nice warm sunny Monday :)
@CourageDearHeart, I just read this poem again and -- wow.
The bold opening line is amazing. The staccato imperative is strong, and yet it takes a few seconds to figure it out -- and, when you do -- pow. And then the commands continue . . . each one more illuminating and tender than the next.