OUR ORIGINAL POETRY: Share It Here

TRIGGER WARNING

Shocked to see one of my earliest works from January this year that described my depression, mindset and voices in my head. I still can't believe this was me just a few months ago.

Thoughts

Thoughts
Verbal Thoughts
Sounds, Words; Voices
Conversation, Articulation, Confusion
Mindgames - Broken Mindset
Internal Verbal Abuse
Relentless, Merciless Commands
Persuasion, Manipulation
Surrender
Collapse
Self-hatred, Despair
Blinded by Darkness
Conflicted
Ugly
Selfish
Dramatic
Ungrateful
Worthless
Cold
Burden
Useless
Temptation
Scratch, Bruise, Beat & Whip
Rubber Band, Red Streaks
Cut
Red is the Purest Colour
Bleed
Deep
Deeper
Badge, Scissors, Razor
Candle Wax, Flame; Burn
Self-Destruction
Losing Grip
Relapse
Failure
Comfort
Lullaby
Voices

People ask how are you

I smile and say I am fine

I've learned to smile and say I am fine

Yet a storm rages on the inside

Raindrops are tears from the storm

A life of deception

I have learned

Storms are not to be heard Raindrops fall deeply into mirky waters Life is like a whirlwind A cycle longing to let go Yet I spin into a hidden storm Raindrops are to be stifled , only misty eyes appear only to be hidden People run from the storm,only wishing to see the sunshine. I will be there when the storm is through Storms bring fear for the unknown,yet sunshine all will embrace. I'll be there when the wind is not whirling I'll be there when the storm is through.

For a friend:

Why can you not be yourself?

It makes me very sad.

Its not my place to tell someone,

But, you should always be yourself.

It doesnt matter what anyone else says.

What are you so scared of?

Being rejected?

You already have many wonderful friends,

So dont be afraid.

Its no ones place to judge you.

Its no ones place to tell you what,

You should like.

Whatever speaks to you,

Speak back to it.

Dont listen.

Dont think.

Follow your heart,

And one day, maybe,

You can be whoever you want,

And not be ashamed of what you like.

Please be who you truly are.

Ill be waiting...to see you blossom into an extraordinary flower.

***WARNING, A TRIGGERING POEM ABOUT SELF HARM***

She is painting,
Carving her masterpiece.
It's full of emotion.
That canvas,
Solving her solutions.
The paint,
Red as blood.
The carves,
Deep as the ocean.
It's a masterpiece.
And once she's done with it,
It will stay there...
Longer than wanted.
But she hides it,
Covers the artwork.
So exquisite,
Yet so misunderstood.
The artwork,
On her ankles.
Don't dare look there,
For the artwork...
Beholds her pain,
Her emotion,
Her true thoughts.
It shows everything,
Yet no one glances at the truth...
No one glances at that artwork,
For it is concealed

White Walls.

Look there's a wall
Oh, there's one too.
There's a total of 4,
I'm in a room.
What a surprise,
Never seen that before.
But have you ever seen,
The child on the floor?
The one crippled with pain,
Amidst their mind.
Who has no escape,
No escape they can find.
You notice the walls,
The floor and the bed,
But have you ever tried to look,
In the child's head?
No, of course not,
That child is fine.
They've plastered a smile,
They don't even whine.
You take in the room,
You see merely the surface,
But see not what's inside it.
Somehow you miss this,
The suffering dear.
But what's that? They're gone!
Not a trace anywhere.
Look over the blood, go past the corpse.
You can't miss the child,
You never saw at all.
You never saw their thoughts run wild,
But you will forever,
Miss that smile.
What caused the death? No one ever knew.
Yet after a while,
Blood cleansed from the walls,
The mystery faded,
The child is simply a memory.
Merely a flicker of a thought, eternally jaded.

While people are

still alive,

you never say

Hello.

But when theyre

a hundred feet underground,

you wished you couldve said,

Dont go.

Deep down in your heart,
There's an empty chasm
It's where your part,
Where the loud roar of anthems
Are played, when your dreams are laid
To rest.

Where are you Lord? Today I wonder where you are

I feel so alone, as if I am the only one in this world

I just don't fit in, an outcast

Alone again,wondering when will this pain end

Will it be today,tomorrow, a year from now

Or will it be when I am gone.

Where are you? a thousand miles away

No! I feel you are unreachable

I do not know who,what or where you are

I hear you will never give us more then we can handle

You believe I am strong, yet , I feel so weak

Sometimes I fight, sometimes I am a little child

I reach out yet I feel I am reaching to an empty hand.

I heard a song 'This Warrior is a child"

I do not let people see the real me

Nobody sees the tears behind closed doors

I smile and say I am fine.

You are the only one who sees the tears,the fears

I cry so many times Lord where are you?

I feel so all alone.

Nobody really knows the little child in me still believes

people can not be trusted, that they are not there for me.

I've learned to look nice on the outside

Yet live in fear in the inside

I do not tell the secrets of who I really am

I try to be strong, let nobody carry the load

I get judged yet nobody has walked my journey

My (Failed) attempt at being deep

-----------------------------------------------------

Dont tell me that you can see the stars in my eyes

because the stars you speak of

are millions of miles away

way up in the sky

Unreachable, but unforgettable.

But my eyes are here

only feet away

staring into yours

and already youve forgotten.

So I do a lot of writing. It allows me to express how I'm feeling without being a burden on others. I don't often share my stuff because well, it's not right good. But I thought I'd share this one because it has a special place in my heart for some reason.

-

These are the days, these are the weeks
These are the people, these are the lives,
But surely life shouldnt feel so meek?
To be running at a standstill, sitting at the dives.

Within us all is the affirming flame,
Within us all is the beacon of light and hope.
Surely life is about the giving, not the game
We just need to stop pretending to cope

We might force upon us a smile,
We might force a laugh.
But surely if we were to pretend for a while,
Wed stop being points on a graph.

Wed stop being a statistic to be looked at,
Wed stop being one more in the blues.
Surely if we tried to forget all that,
People would stop trying to accuse.

They say theyre here, they say theyre there
They claim that theyre gonna care...
But surely they dont dare,
And wed stop having someone to care.

The little white lies we tell ourselves,
The little white lies we tell our closest.
Surely theyd understand if it was about themselves
Theyd understand, theyre our closest.

I wonder what its like in another mind,
I wonder what its like to delve down.
But surely it would be nicer, much more kind
Rather than to be stuck here, ready to drown.

The feeling of drowning consumes
The feeling of being consumed confuses,
Surely theyll need to presume
the feeling of never ending bruises.

I suppose this heres my confession
I suppose its my escape.
But surely to write to the ambiguous aggression,
Ill finally be able to able to reshape.