Attachment Issues - A Poem
I wrote this poem after experiencing some heartbreak from this one guy I am currently talking to.. I expect to feel more heartbreak but I can't walk away from him.
‘Didnt wear my seatbelt
Fell so hard
So fast
Wanted to enjoy myself
Ended up in a pit of misery.
Feels like a crushing rock
Holding me down under
Air bubbles lessening
It’s like I’ve lost the ability to breathe
To see the light
The rug got pulled from under me.
I’m falling
And there’s no where to grab.
Got too close to something real
How silly of me to think it was for me.
How silly of me to let myself believe
That I deserve security and closeness.
Wanted so badly to be connected
I doomed it from the start.
I knew I’d mess up
So I sabotaged myself.
So now I’m drowning in my tears
Wishing I could breathe.
How silly of me to think
Green flags were for me.
-----------
Have me twisted
Heart pangs
Blood down my wrists.
Pain clouding
Breathing labored
Feelings crushed
Doubts intensified.
Questions in the air.
Did I mean anything?
Or was I just another body
To add to your count?
Felt so safe
Now i feel tossed
Like yesterday’s garbage.
You say you’re not leaving
But you don’t show yourself.
All I have is heartbreak
And I did this to myself.
I got close to you
Let myself be hurt.
Opened myself to pain.
I don’t know how to exist
How to pretend you never happened.
Misery in my soul
All I know is sadness.
How lame of me
To think I’m allowed happiness.
It was fun
While it lasted.
I let myself be fooled
Thinking someone could love
All of me.
Should have known
Mother knows best.
No one can love
A broken stitch like me.
@HopefulSprings That is very powerful writing, I can feel your emotions there. I hope that things work out for you. I can see that writing is a good outlet at this time. Have you written any more?
Listening - One Step At A Time!
@MistyMagic yeah I have one more. I’ll share later. He broke up with me last night
@HopefulSprings I'm so sorry to hear that :(
Listening - One Step At A Time!
@MistyMagic
All I can do is breathe
I can’t feel anything
But the pain.
Knives pinched in my insides.
Bleeding on the inside
Yet walking like nothing is happening.
No one can see how bad
These feelings are.
Never good enough
Never deserving of
Sweet touches.
Sinking and drowning
Tears of pain
Heartbreak
Sorrow.
I laid my heart out,
Wore it on my sleeve.
You said I was an awesome person
You made me feel like I was worth something.
Now I’m falling.
Gave you my heart
And it is bruised.
There was nothing
I could have done to stop this
Trainwreck.
You would have found a way out.
I’m never good enough.
Always going to be alone.
You made me feel
Happiness and like
I could be at peace.
Just as easy
Ripped away
And all that’s left is
This intense feeling of no self-worth.
I lost myself in you
I don’t know how to be happy
Without your validation
And your companion.
How much of us
Was me?
Did you mean any of what you told me?
Was it just a ploy to be a good guy?
I’m trapped with all these doubts
Feelings and
I can’t get answers.
Of course, you tell me what I want to hear.
I’m broken,
Lost and sinking.
I’ll never risk love again.
@HopefulSprings Wow, I am so sad at your situation, I know from my own experiences how painful lost love can be, it really crushes and your poem captures that and flung me right back to those times. I hope that you gain strength from those powerful words, you really do have a talent for picking exactly the right word to engulf a feeling. I wonder what you might do when along the way you are feeling other emotions and can share a poem with us.
There is that wonderful words that says. . . but it may be too soon for you to feel that, I really hope you do risk love againand never stop taking that risk.
Listening - One Step At A Time!
@MistyMagic
thank you ! Well I got asked out on a date for tomorrow by a cute engineer so I’m trying not to get my hopes up
Is this a listener that this poem is about?
@cloudySummer no it’s about my ex
@HopefulSprings Good Luck! Hope it goes well!
Listening - One Step At A Time!
Hey, hope you're doing well...
Those are beautiful lines. Every line felt like a pang of pain to me, cuz I felt the same. The same crushing feeling. You described it very beautifully.
Hope you come out stronger dear... You're not alone, we all are with you🤍
@EnchantingNerd
thank you x