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Hopeful0001
1 745,008 M Meaningful Journey 13
Rawr is I love you in dino talk
PathStep 1,819 Compassion hearts29,449 Forum posts5,397 Forum upvotes5,508 Current upvotes5,508 Age GroupAdult Last activeJanuary, 2025 Member sinceJune 28, 2016
Bio

Hello. You can call me Hopeful. I suffer from a few physical limitations like arthritis, muscle atrophy, degenerative disc disease, and a few fractures on my spine. I also suffer from PCOS, which is also known as Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, and asthma. I have the following mental health limitations - Depression, Mild Bipolar, Anxiety, ADHD, and Autism. Despite all these conditions, they do not define who I am, just what I suffer from. I am in the social work field, and continuing to further my education.


What I seek in a listener is someone who listens to me without making assumptions. If you utilize your training of empathy, validation, reflection, and open ended questions, you and I can get on pretty well. I know that cups cannot fix any of my problems. But if I can be heard by someone, it can help reduce the weight on my shoulders.


Much love,


Hopeful









Recent forum posts
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Uninvited Sadness
Poetry / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 Wednesday
...See more My mind is sick Sad despite no reason  I try to fight the sad waves Especially with your love But sometimes the feelings  Just linger like an uninvited guest Difficult thoughts Haunting me. While your support is solace These feelings can be persistent. You have done nothing but be there. Shown me love, Made me feel things No one had ever made me feel. I guess this is what it means  To be sick, mentally, Medication only helps so much. There are days  Where everything is great I can be so happy So baseline. I was getting used to feeling normal Then the tide came Now I’m feeling low. I know that I have you But I can’t help feeling sad.
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Wolf Profile
Arts & Crafts / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 January 5th
...See more
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Love Isolation Never Any More
Poetry / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 January 5th
...See more Hiiiiiii. I am wanting to share a poem I wrote while I was high on an edible (don't worry totally legal and okay) and on the phone with someone who's accepted me and shown me such joy. By no further ado, I wanted to share a piece I called "Love Isolation Never Any More" Sunshine blooms with his gaze Thawing the inner frosted core Love echoes from your embrace. Laughter no longer mythology Carefree energy now science. In a realm of acceptance Merriment persists . Fears of solitude dissipate  His presence never waning. Separation not their fate His sight never resolute. Peace in amour renewed  Compassion in masses Real joy in her eyes.
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Hypothermia of the heart.
Poetry / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 January 2nd
...See more Hypothermia of the heart. Words escape me A silent void where the feelings used to be. Numbness covers my heart Encasing it in a frosted case. Countless times I begged for you Chased you. Longed for a future that could never be. Strived to be something that I couldn’t be. Tried to be flawless and kind  But the reflection is not me. Desperate for tears Yet my eyes stay dry. Numbness continues despite all attempts. I am buried in emptiness.  I thought that with time  A storm would rise in my heart But there’s only stillness.
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Hopeful's Art, replies wanted
Arts & Crafts / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 December 31st
...See more I drew this, I used this [https://i.pinimg.com/originals/55/68/3a/55683adcb091f35fd9d6f1d11f97b973.jpg]for inspiration.   For me, this represents how my depression gets a grip of me,  and how I'm slipping into the fire. How I am drowning and stuck.
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Funeral
Poetry / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 December 29th
...See more This must be our goodbye Cause if I don’t leave on my own I will leave in a body bag. You kill me mentally, emotionally, and physically Drain me of all my energy. I can’t do this anymore I can’t breathe When you pressure me to be there. Be somebody I am not All because you can’t be okay With your own self and time. I want to burn  Maybe that pain would be easier Than the pain of my heart As you ignore all my boundaries. Restrictions and ultimatums in your eyes. Feel like I’ve been drowning Suffocating in this relationship Staying for all the wrong reasons. Every time I pull away You apologize  But Sorry is just a word At this point Do you even mean it when you apologize? The urges get more intense  When we are on the phone You not listening to a thing I say Like my opinions and wants do not matter. This needs to be goodbye Before I die from this disease.
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My relationship sometimes makes me....
Relationship Stress / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 November 5th, 2024
...See more Want to just scream.  It doesn't really matter what i say or what I do, I am always wrong. He thinks I gaslight him by telling him how things he said make me feels. He says that it is him using empathy when he tells me the mean thing my friend said about me to him days ago. But in my mind there's no real point bringing up something like that days after it was said, all it does is hurt me and he can't see that, and said that I am making him out to be the bad guy. He said that all I ever do when I complain about him is make him look like the bad guy and don't tell people about the good he does like buy me food when we go out and pay for my waxes. Our last argument started because I was talking about wanting to go for a promotion and he asked me about my car, asking if my car would take it, and I asked him not to be negative, and he got upset saying he wasn't being negative, that he was talking pros and cons, and I said I dont want to talk about that and it just escalated from there. He says we can't ever talk about serious things. But it is my decision. We don't live together. All we do is see each other when he is here, we sleep together, we go on little dates, And this is going to make me look really bad but we have been dating for over a year and like 3 to 4 months into dating him, I found out he was married. I know I am a bad person for not ending the relationship but he was the first guy who would treat me sweet.  What frustrates me so much about this relationship is that sometimes I feel like he thinks I am a stupid young girl he can control because he is older than me (only by 7) and that if I even disagree with him, I am starting huge issues. Also, the double standards are real. He can be unfaithful but I can't even talk about other men or talk to other men, and he recently got upset because he was told (incorrectly) that I was bragging about an ex and talking about wishing I could talk to men without getting caught by him.  Honestly a part of me is scared he is going to find this post because he does know i spend a lot of time on 7cups but I hope that he does not decide to come check this out but I guess if he brings this post up, it is a sign that he is toxic, right? I feel like im not allowed to vent about I feel and that I walk on eggshells with him. I don't even know if what i feel for him is love or just the fact that I do not want to be alone. I work a lot beyond when I see him, I do like the companionship and the physical intimacy is where we shine the best I guess, which is sad.
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Hopeful's Journal - Replies wanted
Journals & Diaries / by Hopeful0001
Last post
 October 12th, 2024
...See more 5 16 2024 I dont really know what to type in my journal but I was told by my life coach that I shouldnt over think, just write exactly what I am thinking.  My left arm hurts so much, it is from the shoulder to the wrist. I wish this physical pain would give me a break for a few days at the least. I am always in pain and I want the pain to vanish. I can't remember a time where I was not in pain. First diagnosed with all these horrible things like degenerative disc disease, muscle atrophy, and arthritis when I was just 15 and now I am 28 years old with so much more pain. It's really not fair. I have a consult scheduled for June to see a doctor about the arm and I really hope that answers are found. I have a feeling that it is just the arthritis but I would love if there was a miracle cure.  Anyways for not having much to say, I sure said a lot lol
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