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Accepted the Closet

User Profile: Mino1522
Mino1522 December 29th

(For reference Im 18) I've pretty much accepted the fact that I will stay in the closet, family wise, at least. And for that to be secure, I make sure I'm in the closet with things outside of that. Ill always just say Im cis and straight. I dont think I would ever want to even experience coming out to them. I have a lesbian aunts, and they've gotten backlash. They live happy, but still. I dont want to deal with some other issue. Also, I feel like even associating myself with the LGBTQ+ comes with issues, and I just want to chill. I do dress how I want and do the things I like that won't change.


Although, my friends are the only ones that know to an extent. I feel like at this point with them I just say "yeah im queer thats it" But really I think Im bigender plus gay, but Ive changed what Ive said so much, because I was learning and Im not good with the labels. I just know Im me, and that's all. <3

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User Profile: turtlegirl9696
turtlegirl9696 December 29th

Yeah, I actually just came out as bi to my fiancé, but probably won't tell many other people. Definitely still a secret from my family. Would cause way too much drama

1 reply
User Profile: Mino1522
Mino1522 OP December 29th

What did your fiance think? And did it make you feel better? If you feel comfortable answering.

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User Profile: turtlegirl9696
turtlegirl9696 December 29th

He was actually very sweet and not concerned or insecure. He said it doesn't change how he sees me and it's no big deal. I feel very relieved now. Me coming out was a bit of a process because I was nervous. I said originally I was talking about someone I know that thinks she might be bisexual and is afraid to tell her bf. One of his exes was actually bi as well, so I asked him about her. Then, today I told him I was really talking about me. And I am secure that he will not tell anyone that I don't want to know, especially because he never outed his ex.

User Profile: turtlegirl9696
turtlegirl9696 December 29th

As long as I don't want to open the relationship or have a poly relationship or anything, he isn't worried. I don't want any of that anyway. And I definitely won't cheat. He knows I'm still super in love with him.

1 reply
User Profile: Mino1522
Mino1522 OP December 29th

Thats really awesome for you both! The fact that you both have that trust and you feel comfortable is great. Thank you so much for sharing. I have only surface knowledge of LGBTQ+ as an adult, its different from when your younger. So Im glad to have learned and heard from you.

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User Profile: sensitivePark3344
sensitivePark3344 December 30th

May be I should follow your example. By some extent I’m kind like you. My family don’t know about it apart from some friends and just like you said I can do whatever I want. They don’t need to know.

2 replies
User Profile: Mino1522
Mino1522 OP December 30th

Im definitely not someone to follow example 😅 I dont know much about this stuff. But I do know that I just want less drama. But I feel like we shouldn't feel obligated to "come out".

1 reply
User Profile: sensitivePark3344
sensitivePark3344 December 31st

You said it.

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User Profile: blueOrange7790
blueOrange7790 December 31st

@Mino1522


Making effort to prioritize your boundaries and safety is always a great step forward! Best wishes to you and your journey discovering yourself. 🌹