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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #8) When you don't get the role you want

Heather225 August 27th, 2020

Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Hello, students! Let's talk leadership!

Many of you have or will apply for certain roles that interest you! And some times we get it and some times we don't! It can be difficult to find out that we didn't get the role, but we can control how we react to it.

Here are some DOs and DON'Ts:

- DO talk to the leader of the role that you applied for and get some input on what you can/need to do in order to get the role next time! Be aware though most leaders of these roles are busy so give it some time!

- DON'T bring the issue into the support rooms. If you are upset, talking to a peer supporter about how you are feeling is ok!

- DO take some self-care, self-care is good for any occasion but its best to deal with those feelings of failure or disappointment outside of 7 cups, things like going on your member account can be so helpful to overcome some of these feelings

- DON'T think that you are obligated to stay on 7 cups right after finding out bad news, especially if you are in LSR/TL and you see other listeners who have gotten the role that you wanted! It can be hard to deal with and it can cause unneeded jealousy or hurt on your part! Not everyone is like this but if you think that this is a possibility that you can think this way staying away might be a great option!

- DON'T take it personally, everyone is ready at different times. It can be hard for us to realize this but just because someone got the role and they might have been here in less or the same amount of time doesn't mean that you personally are ready! Everyone grows and accomplishes things at different times!

- DO get a mentor, in general its a good idea to get a mentor but for things like your goals on 7 cups mentors can be great and helpful! They can give you feedback, do mock chats with you, and overall help you with your goals as I said before!

- DON'T think you have to apply for every role and every team out there! There is time you don't have to apply for everything! Its super easy to burnout that way, and that can lead to more "rejection" and hurt that none of us want!

*Never let not getting a role the first time discourage you! You will be told when you can apply again and use the feedback that you get to better yourself when you can/decide that you are ready to! practice makes perfect none for us are perfect and no one will ever be! Its a good thing to remember no matter your role as a listener your help is greatly appreciated and you are still helping so many people!*

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Activity: Please reply to 3 of your peers in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

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blissfulTouch29 July 22nd, 2022

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? However, your reaction is normal and valid however you don't have to be rude about it. You can ask questions. What would you say to the leader who has informed you? Ask questions. Ask them to explain something more. See what you can do differently and if it is something you really want keep trying.

4 replies
StarrrGirl20 August 20th, 2022

@blissfulTouch29 wonderfully said 👏

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August 22nd, 2022

@blissfulTouch29

That is a very realistic approach. I like what you have shared.

1 reply
blissfulTouch29 August 24th, 2022

@Helpingheart23. You're welcome

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WarmLightXO July 28th, 2022

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? With grace, compassion, and trying to understand. Accepting feedback would also be helpful!

What would you say to the leader who has informed you? I would thank them for letting me know and for any feedback, and ask whether the role is still open should I decide to grow and come back to it later <3

1 reply
blissfulForest7074 August 11th, 2022

@WarmLightXO

Your answer was really mature. Loved it


August 22nd, 2022

@WarmLightXO

I like your answer, I think that works too.

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Ninziesss July 30th, 2022

@Heather225


If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond?

I would react kindly and mention that there are limited roles and that I probably have some improvements to do.

What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

Thank you for taking my application into consideration. Thank you for your feedback. I will take it into account and improve that what I have to improve before re-applying again.

1 reply
blissfulForest7074 August 11th, 2022

@Ninziesss

A kind and lovely answer :)

Here4good74 September 11th, 2022

@Ninziesss very nice and well said answer

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kenzolena August 5th, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role.

Q: How should you respond? A: I would talk to the leader of the role that I applied for, and ask for some feedback and on what things I could improve so I could apply for the role when I improved on those things that the leader gave feedback on.

Q: What would you say to the leader who has informed you? A: I would say thank you for letting me know, and I would ask them how I could improve on the things that I did wrong in for example the exam that I took. I wouldn’t get sad as I understand that I might not be ready for it yet and that’s okay.


- Lena

1 reply
blissfulForest7074 August 11th, 2022

@kenzolena

I like your approach. It was optimistic and a mature away to deal with the situational problem.

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blissfulForest7074 August 11th, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I would thank them for informing me of the results and ask for points for improvement if they had read or gone through my application form.

2 replies
StarrrGirl20 August 20th, 2022

@blissfulForest7074 bravo 👏👏

August 22nd, 2022

@blissfulForest7074

That's a good approach 👍

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StarrrGirl20 August 20th, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

If I wasn't given the role i wanted, then there must definitely be a reason behind it. I would inquire the leader for some feedback on how I can better myself and ask for any available places on the team.

August 22nd, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I would first thank them for considering me for the position, and then respond in a friendly and professional manner and ask for feedback to improve.


2 replies
Here4good74 September 11th, 2022

@Helpingheart23 feedback is a great way to improve and get the role next time, I agree

SirenOfSerenity September 12th, 2022

@Helpingheart23 I like that you mentioned showing gratitude for being considered 😊 And showing interest in improving for that position or better

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niceworldmnd August 24th, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?


I should accept and respect them first. but the thing is i never get disappointed , so easily I go for discussing it with my mentor and find out the problem like which area what i should be doing or vise versa and etc.. after it , i start again and work on myself to get the role next time ;)

3 replies
Here4good74 September 11th, 2022

@niceworldmnd I agree with you, really thoughtful response, good job 👏

SirenOfSerenity September 12th, 2022

@niceworldmnd

It's very admirable that you keep your composure and utilize having a Mentor to work towards improvements or opportunities that are a better fit 😌

KimByeongIn September 12th, 2022

@niceworldmnd

Such an amazing character. Nice to have you as my peer.

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Here4good74 September 11th, 2022

@Heather225

If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

I would respond to it thoughtfully, take my time to calm down a little in order to move forward. I also may switch to my member account if I needed extra support or reach out to a peer supporter to talk about my emotions.

I would ask them for some input on what I can do next time in order to succeed. Also give them time as they might be busy.

3 replies
SirenOfSerenity September 12th, 2022

@Here4good74

I like that you mentioned connecting into your Member account for support, that support is always there for us 💙

KimByeongIn September 12th, 2022

@Here4good74

Great answer and I'm happy to see that you have a growth mindset too!

Mari228 September 14th, 2022

@Here4good74

Switching to member account when needing the support is a courageous idea and knowing you’ll be understood and being heard in some way definitely helps without being obligated to act a certain way.

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SirenOfSerenity September 12th, 2022

@Heather225

Question: If you find out you were not given a role, how should you respond? What would you say to the leader who has informed you?

- My response to the Leader would be to inquire about feedback, ask what improvements I need to make as well as ask which other roles would the Leader suggest to me.


1 reply
KimByeongIn September 12th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

You're always a sweet soul. Keep up the good work!

Mari228 September 14th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

Asking the leader what they think would be a good fit I’d smart in a way that you can figure out what you’re doing that affects how you’ll be accepted and what you need to do to be recognized for the role you want.

yourbuddy30 October 8th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity yes, asking for role suggestions to apply can be really good for us to explore our options and work on the feedback. Thank you for sharing siren!

November 7th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

Good. Repely and I never thought about asking about other roles at the same time.
Josh3889 December 8th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

I really like your words for this one. Sweet & simple!

Immakindlistener22 December 16th, 2022

@SirenOfSerenity

Yea asking on improvements is what I would do too!

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