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Course 2: Becoming a 7 Cups Leader - (Discussion #3) The Detriments of Gossip

Heather225 August 24th, 2020
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Please note: In order to successfully complete Course 2, you must respond to this post. Your comment/response should answer the questions/shows that you completed the given activity (if any). Read the post carefully and follow the instructions given. Save your responses to a document that you can later refer to. You will need to copy/paste your response in the course evaluation form at the end of each course to show that you have done the work and to refresh your memory.
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Our next objective in this course is to master effective communication skills for healthy interpersonal and professional relationships.

Don't Gossip - Deepstash

Please watch this video
1. Why is gossiping bad?
2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping in the replies!
3. Please reply to 3 of your peers  in this thread with encouraging or supportive words!

After fulfilling the requirements of this post, please check out the next post here! You must take part in the brainstorming/activities given in all of these posts to successfully complete the program.


This post is brought to you by the Leadership Development Program Team, find out more information about the program here.

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MarleyR April 19th, 2021
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@herealways27 Really amazing quote. You're a good person.

kindLemonade April 6th, 2021
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@Heather225

1. Why is gossiping bad?

Because when someone gossips, it will start a chain reactions and others will think it's ok to gossip and talk bad about others behind their back.


2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping in the replies!

-I don't know enough about the situation to comment on it.

cuteeeezombieeee April 8th, 2021
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@kindLemonade

I agree with your statement about gossiping starting a chain reaction! A lot of us don't even think about the consequences which are going to take place afterwards! Take care and best of luck heart

cuteeeezombieeee April 8th, 2021
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1. Why is gossiping bad?

Gossiping can have a really negative effect, as it can ruin someone else’s reputation. It’s not our place to say or comment on what others do/say. Gossiping also results in mistrust and is a roadblock to building meaningful relationships!

2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping in the replies!

"I don't know the other person's perspective, so I prefer to not discuss what I think they were thinking or feeling in their absence."

Readylistener April 15th, 2021
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@cuteeeezombieeee Your reason for why gossiping is bad makes so much sense!

loveagape April 14th, 2021
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Q: Why is gossiping bad?

A: Gossip is bad because it is an idle talk or rumor of another person, and it is poison.
Q: List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping!

A: It is better to talk about the weather, how you feel about something or think about something.

Readylistener April 15th, 2021
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Gossiping is bad because you don't know the full story and can unnecessarily harm someone, and spread lies. It can ruin people's self-esteem too.

Statement- I don't know enough about the situation to comment on it

MarleyR April 19th, 2021
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@Readylistener Ruining self esteem is definitely a great point. You're a caring listener.

confidentpanda April 15th, 2021
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Gossiping is bad because it is almost always rooted from jealousy or spite, never from kindness. Because of this, someone is always going to get hurt.

A statement from the video:

I don't know the other person's perspective, so I prefer to not discuss what I think they were thinking or feeling in their absence

Ethan May 30th, 2021
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@Lww873 I love that statement! It is so valid - You never know somebody else's perspective and so discussing them when they are not around is never a good idea.

SweetDreamer69 April 17th, 2021
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1. Why is gossiping bad? Gossiping is bad because it can by hurtful for the people about whom you're gossiping, it creates a negative environment around you and the person to whom you are gossiping to, will have a negative thinking about you. In short, there is no positive outcome in gossiping and one should refrain from doing so. 2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping- Making a choice not to gossip is like making a choice choice not eat sugar. It takes practice, discipline and strength to commit to. But in doing so, you'll have a massive positive impact on your life.

Cristen April 18th, 2021
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@SweetDreamer69
100% agree on the statement you've chosen blush it's going to take practice and dedication to stop the habit of gossiping!

Cristen April 18th, 2021
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1. Why is gossiping bad?
Gossiping is bad because it reflects badly on you and its only purpose is to spread toxic negativity that can slowly corrode and break down the relations of everyone involved – it’s basically like a slow acting poison.


2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping in the replies!
A statement I learned from this video is that you could also point out a quality you like about the person who’s being gossiped about, for example ‘I’ve always found XYZ easy to talk to’ – sticking up for them in their absence would thus help counter the negativity and bring positivity!

MarleyR April 19th, 2021
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@Cristen I liked how you mentioned the toxicity of the negativity gossiping brings.

MarleyR April 19th, 2021
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Gossiping is bad because it brings more negativity to a community that is all about helping and positivity. If I was asked to participate in gossip, I would say I get do not like talking about others I do not really know.

giggleZebra2708 April 21st, 2021
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@Heather225

Why is gossiping bad ?

Gossiping is bad as it throws light into misinterpreting an individual, and forces a fake, bad facade on them, when in reality they might be a completely different individual.

List a statement that you learned in this video to stop gossiping in the comments!

I personally do not know any of the individuals commenting and it could also subconsciously make others perceive me in the bad light.

Suryansh May 2nd, 2021
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Hello Everyone!

1. Why is gossiping bad?
Gossiping is bad because it is hurtful to others. It damages the trust of the people in ourselves and the trust in each other in the community. It puts a negative effect both on you and the other person about whom the gossiping is going on. I feel, that if someone gossips about me behind me when I am not present, I will really feel so bad so how can I gossip about other people, they have feelings too like me and they could feel bad too. It spreads rumors about people. It also changes the way people look at you and others. It is always better not to gossip about anyone who is not present in the conversation so as to protect ourselves, others, and this whole community from losing trust in each other.

2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping in the replies!
I don't know the other person's perspective, so I prefer to not discuss what I think they were thinking or feeling in their absence.

Thank You!

Be the change that you wish to see in the world.

May 30th, 2021
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Hi @SuryanshSingh! I totally agree with you on the fact that gossiping damages the trust we have with each other. And since trust is crucial when working together as a community, gossiping will have a negative impact on the community overall.

FawkesCare12 May 6th, 2021
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Hello friends :)

1. Why is gossiping bad?

It’s a toxic action that harms people in ways we cannot even fully comprehend. There is no way we can completely understand what another person is thinking or going through. By backbiting and spreading rumours, we may cause damage to another person’s reputation, scar them both mentally and emotionally and in the process tarnish our own character.

2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping

Pointing out a quality I like about the person and sticking up for the person in their absence.

shallowWater7547 May 10th, 2021
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Gossiping is the very ugly, unfair thing to do because the intent behind gossip is usually to make someone look bad. It is not only toxic to the person we are gossiping about but for us too.

I don't know enough about the situation to comment on it.

DigitalKnight May 10th, 2021
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@Heather225

Why is gossiping bad?

Gossiping is usually like igniting a fire in a forest. it leads to rumours. It usually tarnishes someone reputation. It is toxic to a community. There are alot of misunderstandings among people that arise from a tiny gossip.

What can i do to stop it?

Gossips usually take place when someone judges another person without knowing the full story or what they might be going through. Its better to avoid including a third person in a conversation.

Ethan May 30th, 2021
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@DigitalKnight Wow, I love your analogy of gossip and relating it to a forest fire!

mamtasha22 May 11th, 2021
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@Heather225

1. Why is gossiping bad

There are so many reasons why gossiping is bad but it still happens on a regular basis. No matter how bad the results are we still can’t keep from gossiping. Plus, we’ve all been victims of gossiping, yet still turn around and gossip about others. It’s a vicious cycle and it needs to stop. A few reasons why gossiping is bad would be:

Reputation

One of the reasons why gossiping is bad is because it can ruin the other person’s reputation. No one is born evil; we’re good people on the inside so everyone should be given the benefit of the doubt. However, if you’re one to maliciously spread rumors about someone, it can really fog their reputation thus affecting them when trying to meet new people or land a new job.

Trouble

Spreading gossip can offend people and rightfully so. As a result, you can be confronted about your bad habit. Not only is this embarrassing and awkward for you, but you usually will end up looking like the bad person for spreading gossip or rumors. Furthermore, people won’t want to associate themselves with you if you’re someone who has a reputation of being a gossiper or someone who is fake.

People lose faith in you

Once you’ve been pinpointed as the culprit behind the gossiping, people will start to pull away from you. Not only will they not trust that their secrets are safe with you but they’ll also start to wonder what other bad qualities you have. For example, if you love to spread gossip, are you also fake to people? Do you lie or exaggerate to make stories and gossip more interesting?

Legal issues

Sometimes gossiping can lead to legal issues! Gossip can affect someone’s health, business or emotional state. All of these are real reasons that someone could take you to court. Ironically, this will hurt your reputation as well as cost you thousands of dollars in legal fees.

Seriously hurt someone

Gossiping can really hurt someone. And we don’t mean hurt someone as in “make them cry” but hurt someone as in “cause emotional and mental distress leading to depression and thoughts of suicide”. Gossiping can cause irreversible damage if the gossip is bad enough. Plus, whatever you’re gossiping about could be a really sensitive and personal issue for someone that they don’t want publicly announced.

Bad habits are hard to kill

Gossiping can become a bad habit. Even if you realize you’re doing it and you want to stop, you might instinctively start doing it about certain people. Plus, once it’s a habit you’ll find it’s difficult to talk about anything else without adding gossip to it. You’ll turn into a broken record always repeating the same negative stuff again and again. Naturally, people will become bored and disinterested in what you have to say.

Negative energy

Most gossip isn’t good gossip. Therefore, if you’re always spewing nasty things about people, your friends are going to become turned off from you. No one likes a negative Nelly. Plus, no one wants to be poisoned with negative energy, thoughts or emotions. As a result, people will start to avoid you.

2. List a statement you learned from its video to stop gossiping in the replies:

I don't know the other persons perspective so I prefer not to discuss what I think they were thinking or feeling in their absence

3. A quote for all of you

"A day spent judging another I a painful day, A day spent judging yourself is a painful day"~Gautam Buddha

LovetoGod May 19th, 2021
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@mamtasha22

Love your answer. You have explained the reasons so well ❤❤

mamtasha22 May 19th, 2021
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@LovetoGod

Thanks, I did some research on it and read a few articlesheart

LovetoGod May 19th, 2021
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@mamtasha22

That's great😊👍

lueurspace May 15th, 2021
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1. Why is gossiping bad?

It makes one unlikeable. It creates a negative cycle of people believing the bad things said about another person and somewhere makes them link those shared bad traits with the one who is gossiping in the first place.

2. List a statement you learned from this video to stop gossiping in the replies!

"I don't know enough about the situation to comment on it." -> This seems very easy for me because I almost always believe that there is something I don't know and in the past, it has worked out for me to say this.

If I know the other person, I will stand up for them and share what qualities I admire about the person they want to gossip about. This actually does two things, if it's in a group where this is happening, the person realizes that they cannot "convince" me to stay and gossip with them, and it shows others that they had a choice to walk away from it too, making them now realize that the person they are gossiping about doesn't deserve to be talked in that way.

You can't give your life more time, so give the time you have, more life.

LovetoGod May 19th, 2021
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@lueurspace

Wonderfully explained answers 😊

peacefulIris56 May 21st, 2021
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@lueurspace

Yes. I agree that it creates that negative cycle and it's good to break free from it.

May 22nd, 2021
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@lueurspace Liked your input about sending-out the right signal that everyone has a choice to not indulge in the gossip and walk-away from it.

May 30th, 2021
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Hi @lueurspace! Wow! Another well written response from you. I love how you pointed out the fact that you should stand up for the person being gossiped about if you know them. I agree that walking away from gossip situations is certainly a choice but it is often easier said than done.

helpfuldipper June 10th, 2021
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@lueurspace great answer. I am a little hesistant to stand up for people. But I think after reading your answer I will try to do better. Great work

FlourishingDimensions June 22nd, 2021
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@lueurspace It absolutely can create a negative cycle. I really appreciate how you captured that in your response!

milkoreos July 15th, 2021
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@lueurspace well said lu

milkoreos July 15th, 2021
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@lueurspace well said lu

milkoreos July 15th, 2021
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@milkoreos o i don't know why it sent twice sorry!!

ComradeRuhi August 6th, 2021
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@lueurspace
I think your response is super insightful. Gossiping really is a vicious cycle, and I wish more people realized how harmful it can be, to the user, and the one being illy spoken about. The only thing I'd say to other people behind your back is how much of a great leader you'll be here at 7 cups, hehe. :)

Crystaldancer September 3rd, 2021
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@iigotyourbackii

You are right and many times it hurts those who are behind gossip, seeing someone cry for something like that, breaks my heart

Crystaldancer September 3rd, 2021
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@lueurspace

You got very valuable and key information, excellent work <3

AliveandAlive January 29th, 2022
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@lueurspace very well explained!!!