Ni's Little Solace
Not sure why I am creating this thread exactly, and I'm doing this so late at night as well :') I just felt... like I should do this haha. I do have a one line a day thread although I... don't think I have felt so free over there to write as much as I wished. So I thought maybe... I should just make another thread, a diary perhaps.. where I can really be myself.. and maybe post pictures and quotes, literary quotes maybe... and poems.. specifically haiku hehe. Also vents.. thoughts and maybe letters :')
Replies are welcome as well <3 although please remember to stay respectful and kind.
*sending lots of love and hugs because why not*
don’t got one (:
@LoveMyMoonflowers Maybe you don't need a definite answer right now? Maybe with a little time the answer will reveal it's self?
@mytwistedsoul
…. maybe. :') <3
Hey hey ni buddy
Just checking in, been a few days. How are you doing?
@AvyIsKing
hi mop 💙 i’m alive unfortunately… 💙 thank you for asking though friend. and yeah it has been a while :') ni friend seems to be popping in and out of cups depending on how much my brain’s bothering me and how i feel lmao. :')
i wish i’d made a post for mop’s birthday like i planned to before but i was away off of cups. i’m sorry friend 😞 sending hugs for you if okay and belated birthday wishes. 💙
(ni friend still peeks/reads mop’s diary forums when you write there… me knows life is hard friend, and tbh me thinks hard would be an understatement. i’m sending the biggest hugs your way. 🥺 funni loves you.)
@LoveMyMoonflowers
well I'm glad ur alive. Beyond glad. Life is vv hard funni, but its ok. Mop is here ❤️ big protective hug
and dw about it, since youve read my diary you know im on and off aha
love you funni
@AvyIsKing
*big protective hug right back* 💙 funni friend loves mop too. 💙
:/
@LoveMyMoonflowers It's nice to see you again 💙
@mytwistedsoul
💜
@LoveMyMoonflowers How are you? If it's ok to ask of course - no pressure to answer either 💙
@mytwistedsoul
i'll pass 💜 how are you, Soul? (no pressure to answer either <3)
@LoveMyMoonflowers I understand. I'm sorry - I wish i could make things better for you 😔
I'm ok right now. Got some official business taken care of earlier so I'm pretty happy about that. Thank you for asking 💙
@mytwistedsoul
it's okay. thank you for asking though 💜
awwe i'm glad to hear you're okay right now. it's good that you got some official business taken care of (: 💜 hope you're taking care of yourself Soul friend.
@LoveMyMoonflowers I'm trying. Maybe that's all that matters is that we try. Some days are harder than others to try though. Kind of like your heart just into it I guess
I know I've said it before and I don't mean to repeat myself and you can tell me to shut the heck up if I'm working a nerve or annoying you but - um - if you need anything or if I can help - ya know? I don't like to think that you're struggling alone 😔 💙
@mytwistedsoul
i think i get what you mean. :') i’m proud of you Soul and i’m glad you’re trying. 💙 i think you’re right in that… what matters is that we try. 💜
aww no Soul, it’s okay. i appreciate you for caring. thank you… :')
but… i don’t care about myself anymore though tbh. at least not enough to ask for help or anything. i’m fine, really. i don’t have any expectations or wishes. i don’t really…… care. if i get better or not. it doesn’t matter to me, i don’t understand why it would matter to anyone else. i guess i just don’t care. “how are you” i don’t care how i am :') one night, i’ll cry, the next night, i’ll try to tear myself to pieces… it doesn’t matter…
anyways i’m sorry 😞 i’m ranting :')
@LoveMyMoonflowers Please don't be sorry 💙 Rant away ok? I'm not just a fair weather friend. 😞 I wish I knew what to say to you. I understand the feeling. I've been there myself. Your tears say something somewhere is hurting. 😞 It's a big pain I bet. It's tearing you apart because it wants to be heard and healed. Things can only stay buried for so long until they claw their way out. I'm only guessing here of course. I could be way off. I wish your parents could see how much your hurting and would help you heal that pain
*Offers safe gentle hugs* I wish I could be more help or had something more to offer 😞 I'm sorry you're hurting so 💙
@mytwistedsoul
hugs…
im sorry.
9:37 PM.
nowadays i'm randomly looking at the time and typing it here as if it is of any significance, which, it isn't. lmao.
tomorrow's Good Friday so mom said we won't be having school then.
idk why i said that it just crossed my mind.
hello darkness.
the dark is comfortable isn’t it…
the comfortable. the known. the familiar.
at first its hard not to be scared.
but after a while the screaming and the tears and then the numbness and the silence and this whole world becomes……..
normal. soon we get used to it. soon, the darkness is our home.
