I want to die but I can't.

@RedAki It's nice that you're aware of the way it works (point 2), at least. It's time to be strong and to stick with the fact that, as you said, it'll eventually fade. The way we see things changes so often during our whole life, but I'm pretty sure there are many other stages to come and this one shouldn't prevent the future ones from coming. It just doesn't deserve the victory against our own happiness. I'm aware we listeners shouldn't give advice, but from what life has taught me, I can tell these emotional stages are like a river. Let it flow. Don't try to position yourself against your own feelings. Don't follow them. Just let it pass.

If you ever need to talk or express yourself, you can always open a private chat with me, and I'll happily listen to you. :)

However, if you ever feel things are becoming worse, I suggest you to seek for professional help as soon as possible. You know when this problem is knocking the door, somehow. If it doesn't leave after a while or it becomes much more stronger; don't ignore it, even if you're used to see it coming and leaving. Personally, I once underestimated it. There was a day in which I woke up and I simply knew I couldn't handle it anymore, that it was just too much. I had much more work to do just to get rid of it, and I truly regret that I didn't "kill" it when I had the chance.

Best of luck.

@RedAki

I can't breathe. I can't move. I'm at school so I have to look normal. I don't know where to turn to. I really can't breathe.

Please delete this.

@RedAki

you want me to delete the thread ?

@HalliwellSister

I was embarrassed right after writing so I reported myself a few times but it didn't delete. And I guess I wrote that so people could disregard this. But the replies surprised me and I want to think about it. So I guess I take that back.

@RedAki

alright :)

@RedAki

Medicines have always proven pretty lame when it comes to solving this kind of situation. As much as I hate to say it, chemical compounds are not omnipotent.
I'd like to tell you you shouldn't feel selfish for asking help to other. That would be pretty ironic considering that is very exactly why I can't say a thing to anyone about how I feel. But hey, I'm gonna say that anyway. Don't feel selfish for asking help. It's all but selfish. And there's no better way of spotting a selfless person than looking for those who call themselves selfish.

I'd like to tell you your last sentence was not needed, but it actually was a big help to understand. You... you are not actually upset are you ? You wish you were, but it's almost like you don't have the strength to be upset anymore.

But you're here.

Yeah, I know, written like that, it sounds lame, but it's a solid fact. As much as I hate to admit it for myself - again - the simple fact of being here proves there's still a way to get out of what you're in.

Clocks can break pretty easily. It just needs a spark. This trigger has gotta be here, somwhere. No other choice but to keep lookin'.

I want to die .but I can't...I think dying would solve all my problems....really...dying is the perfect solution to my problem...but I don't want to make my parents hurt...i m here at home praying to god to take me away as soon as possible...since I can't kill myself right now

@neatFig7504 From one to another, as hypocritical as it is for me, and as late as this is, don't do it. Talk to your parents or anyone who knows you. Talk to someone here.

You have done really well to post this. I am sorry that you feel so bad.