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7 Cups feels one-sided and meaningless

While being a listener I try to do my part of helping 7 Cups as however much I can through online and offline outreach. Referring to people in need. Following the 7 cups socials etc. But I don't think I'm getting the same support back.


On March 17th, 2024, I started my Psychology themed I n 's t a g r a m page. Being a Psychology student to share everything that I've learned, raise awareness help spread the word further, and break stigma.


Once I posted on a few forums to promote this new page of mine as it would help me if I could reach a new audience to help me with my mission, and it got deleted by the forum managers as it was possible to search my personal account as it was mentioned in the bio of the Psychology account (FYI My personal account has always been private, meaning that no one could access any of my personal images and misuse them etc) I accepted that decision with respect and utmost understanding.


Later on after removing my personal username from my psychology account bio, again in hopes of gaining some support from friends who visit my profile, I wrote a short note, mentioning my username on my 7 Cups Listener Profile Page bio section. Which serves as my personal space. It wasn't that I wanted to promote the page for personal gains or I was sharing my personal images out there.


A few days later when I checked my 7 Cups bio for some reason, that Promotion note mentioning my username was vanished. My personal profile page got manipulated by the admins here and the reason is unknown for now.


Being on 7 Cups feels meaningless, as if I'm just giving out my all without receiving any support back. All the rules and regulations for Listeners are suffocating me. I'm posting this on the forum knowing that it might get deleted too. But I just had to say this. I don't care if I get kicked out of here.

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AffyAvo April 25th

Being a listener is pretty one sided - in general volunteering tends to be.

Listeners are supported in different ways. There are learning opportunities, they can get references, endorsements on LinkedIn. It's not really a *** for tat thing though, the way we really offer support is to encourage listeners to use a member account if they want emotional support.

There's a lot to mod on site, so trying to manage whatever websites or platforms members or listeners might choose to share really would open up a lot of potential for abuse. This is a big part of the reason why no offsite contact is quite a broad rule, for members and listeners. It doesn't matter if it's professional social media or not. It's shared in the General Guidelines:

Refrain from sharing personal contact information
  • Including, but not limited to, social media accounts, home addresses, phone numbers, messaging apps/sites, or any other medium of contact off-site. Learn more about internet safety in this forum.
  • Offsite contact is never permitted while you are a member of the 7 Cups community, including if you are on a self-care or deactivation break. While you are a member of this community, no matter your account status, this is the rule. There are no exceptions. Please respect it & keep yourself safe!

The guidelines for more specific areas also repeat this guideline.

A exception to this is social soldiers but there is training, oversite and limitations with how the social media accounts specific to the role are to be used.

When it comes to mental health professionals there are therapist accounts. I don't know all of the details but to get one of these accounts someone is supposed to show something to show they are a mental health professional. Even with these accounts, there is no free for all with sharing offsite. There is a therapist directory, therapist profiles can link offsite and the therapists do get a signature line when they post to the forums.

9 replies
Muse4apoem April 27th

I’m not a listener but I posted thread about therapy and posted a TW. It got deleted it was actually a question I was having a pretty bad day. Really it felt like a “melt down.” I don’t really get why it was deleted because I did give a warning. It really wasn’t bad. It was more of a question. I wish they would tell you “we are deleting this.” “You shouldn’t post this because xyz.” You can’t even edit things. You can’t even go back to old threads you post. I think this site just needs a big “update.” But they would probably have more spam and trolls. I don’t understand why your links got deleted however that’s very strange maybe it’s a privacy thing.

8 replies
AffyAvo April 29th

@Muse4apoem Generally, things are only deleted if they are against the guidelines. In most cases, people are informed although there can be a slight delay if the moderator and the informer are 2 separate people. There are some exceptions where informing someone isn't necessary, the policy is here

If you have questions about forum moderation, including why a post was deleted, you can email forum@7cups.com

If you want something edited or deleted you can reach out to a forum mentor, flag it and write in the comments what you want done or use this form.



2 replies
Muse4apoem April 29th

My thread might have been buried that day for all I know, I posted a few that day. It was a 2 or 3 weeks ago I’m not too upset over it, just confused because you can’t really find it again easily. No big deal about that particular said thread I was pretty upset that day.

1 reply
AffyAvo April 30th

@Muse4apoem If you search the forums there's 2 options you can use as filters - my threads and subscribed.

My threads will be any of the threads you started ie. you made the first post.

When you post to another thread, the default is to subscribe. You can also subscribe (or unsubscribe) by clicking the bookmark icon near the bottom of the first post.

It's also possible to access someone else's threads from their profile, for example I can see the list of threads you made with this link https://www.7cups.com/forum/search/?screenname=Muse4apoem

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Mosita May 6th

I had no idea posts get deleted :( I downloaded this app because I'm poor and I really needed help or to vent about 4 days ago but I can't find my post and I admit I feel lost since I don't know how to navigate this app at all, how do I find my post???

4 replies
Muse4apoem May 6th

Well I’m not sure it probably did just get lost. Threads sometimes don’t get interaction. Sometimes it takes a few days. I would try to either repost it or just contact a listener or therapist. I wasn’t to happy about my post getting lost. If what they said was true they tell you it was going to get deleted.

Muse4apoem May 6th

Listeners are free.

HopieRemi May 6th

@Mosita

You can find it on your profile :) on browser.

1 reply
Mosita May 6th

So not thru the app? Only browser?

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nnochu April 26th

I am not a listener or a volunteer but I cannot explain just how grateful I am to every person who has ever shared their time with me on this platform. Time after time, I’ve found comfort in talking with the volunteers here. I’m sorry your goals are being oppressed at the moment but I want to take the time to thank you for what you do and the outreach you are trying to accomplish. It means a lot to me and others like me who feel this is a safe place to talk about how we really feel.

cloudySummer April 27th

@ThoughtsBubbleExpress When helping others feels meaningless to someone who wants to become a therapist, this sounds a bit strange to me.

HopieRemi April 28th

@ThoughtsBubbleExpress


hiii so the guidelines prohibit all forms of offsite contact. It doesn’t matter if it’s your personal account or not. Linking it in your bio doesn’t exempt you as you’re not supposed to share any of this here. I get you want to get more followers and help people with it but you will have to find other way to advertise. 

sighmonne April 30th

"I can't get followers through 7cups which means that 7cups is meaningless". 

You should probably leave 7cups then. We listen with no gain other than the feeling of helping someone, and that's one of the reasons why this site is such a beautiful place.

So, other than the link information to your other media, nothing else makes you feel this way ?

I guess I don't understand how not being able to promote a personal page of yours makes the entire 7 cups platform one sided and meaningless. That seems like a bit much.

That's just my opinion. That's why I ask. Is there any other reason you feel that way? Or are you just upset you can't network ? Trying to understand. Hope you are ok 🙏 it seems like you've had a good response here and healthy support from those using the app about your feelings. Seems to show it's a good place to be if you are feeling down. I hope you continue to stay here and share what's bothering you. I'm here if you need to chat or vent.

alexlemon May 4th

@ThoughtsBubbleExpress i understand this may be upsetting but we are not aloud to share our media handles it is against guidelines and means of offsite contact and is a violation to your safety as a lisiner i sometimes get pepole trying to share the media handles if you would look at the gaudelines you will understand that it is against the rules of sharing socals and anything that links you to offsite 

@ThoughtsBubbleExpress i support you and I get it how it could be one-sided and I've been struggling with the same thing here too for the past month and a half but I'm here for you

Hey love,

I can see that you’re stressed and I just want to let you know that when you give, you are always receiving. Even if you don’t know it you’re making a positive impact in these peoples lives and that itself is a gift. I’m proud of you for sharing your truth, we’re all here for you.



I think I understand what you’re trying to do. I also understand that this wonderful community is based upon a lot of peer support. There are “professionals” available but for the most part I think that everyday people from around the world try and come together and help each through whatever life throws at us. 

This community is a safe place for everyone to be. Everyone should keep private identifying info completely separate in order to help keep that safety net intact. 

I don’t know that much the politics but I do know this place is a wonderful place. It will always be a work in progress but there again everyone is and always will be a work in progress also. 

Don’t give up on this community, we won’t give up on you and everything you have to offer us