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I need a new friend

cyanMoon6064 July 29th, 2023

My best friend and I ended our bestfriendship of 12 years this year and I haven’t get over it. It has caused me to have depression and I guess I’m looking for a friendship to take my mind off it.

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FrenchMarbles July 29th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

I'm really sorry to hear that you went through such a difficult time 😔 Losing a best friend after 12 years must have been incredibly tough for you. It's completely understandable that you're still trying to cope with it all. Remember, it's okay to feel the way you do, and it's essential to give yourself time to heal.

Building new friendships can be a great way to find support and distraction during challenging times 💛 You deserve genuine connections that will help you grow and bring joy back into your life. I'm here for you if you ever want to talk or share your feelings. Together, we can explore ways to find new friends and ways to manage your emotions. Hang in there, and remember that better days will come. 🌈✨

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passionateEast518 July 30th, 2023

I am so sorry that happened to you. My best friend of 20+ years has not been treating me very well lately. I know what you are going through.

passionateThinker3248 July 30th, 2023

I'm sorry you are going through that, I'm going through the same thing myself. My ex best friend has been making me feel worthless and truthfully doesn't feel like they are my friend anymore

cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

I need some courage to talk to speak to her about it again. Because honestly, I don’t want to lose her as a friend. I mean, it’s twelve years

Sudmantohelp July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

I can be your friend


1 reply
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

Would be glad to make your acquaintance!

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Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

I completely get it.

for me, the hardest part is trying to rekindle a deteriorating relationship by trying to be the first one to talk. It’s rough.

More power to you brother/sister. I know you can get through it.

14 replies
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

How did you even start? I’m going to it today and I’m dreading

13 replies
Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

It depends. Are you gonna do it online over text or in person?

4 replies
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

In person. It’s a long story but our Sunday is always being the dog out day tgt

3 replies
Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

With my friend what I did was find a place that’s nostalgic. A place where we both had a memory together and we can bring it up with a phrase like “Remember when we used to (Insert event/memory)” to get the ball rolling.

for us it was this park that we used to get into a lot of fights in when we were kids.


from there, the memory helped us remember what our friendship used to be and it took off and we rekindled it.

Since you’re going out with your dogs maybe you can walk to a place where you and your friend shared a memory?

Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

(Sorry, there’s no reply button on your latest message. So I had to backtrack to this one).

Well, surely that’s a glimmer of hope right? That you two have an unspoken bond of taking your dogs out together? I do get the frustration you’re dealing with though. It’s a real struggle trying to be the one carrying a relationship while the other person see

And since you shared your age I think I should also share mine. I’m 19, hope that doesn’t change anything.

1 reply
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

Let’s just hope that I can pluck up the courage to talk to her about it

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Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

Also, if this isn’t rude to ask, are you a girl and is this another girl who you were friends with?

Just asking since I’m a guy and my friend who this happened to was a guy too. I know that female friendships operate a bit differently than male ones.

3 replies
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

Yes, we are both females but our friendship isn’t those that you see in shows or movies where there’s a lot of giggles and what not. And right now, I’m just dreading having to start the conversation because I’m afraid that she’s not going to salvage the friendship. Things have gotten to such a bad situation that I’m no longer confident to say she will definitely put in the effort.

2 replies
Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

Oh I definitely get that. You feel like you’re the only one putting in any effort to maintain the relationship right? That’s rough.

Has she agreed to meet you in person? If she had, I’m sure she cares enough to at least talk if she’s agreed to meet.


if you don’t mind me asking, how old are you two? I hope that doesn’t come off as weird. Just wondering since age can influence relationships and friendships right?

1 reply
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

There’s no agree to meet or what because today it’s our norm to bring the dog out tgt. It’s like an unspoken thing.

Both my friend and I are 34

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Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

I know you can. That hope you have will turn into action and that action will turn into courage. You can do it. Those 12 years weren’t there for nothing. Good luck to you. Tell me how it goes if you can.


3 replies
cyanMoon6064 OP July 30th, 2023

Hello! A little update! Took your advice and broached the topic though it was only at the end of the day(too much hesitation and overthinking in my head). Im glad I took the leap because the conversation turned out well. And I’m really thankful to you for all the encouragement because it was at the back of my head the entire time

2 replies
Ar4571 July 30th, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

That’s great to hear. Honestly, you’re real welcome. Sorry for the late reply, I’ve been dealing with some personal issues myself. Anyway, I’m very happy for you.

1 reply
cyanMoon6064 OP July 31st, 2023

Oh no, I’m sorry to hear about your issues. Anything that you would like to share? I would love to be your listening ear

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Armon23 July 31st, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

I am very sorry you lost your best friend of 12 years! That is definately something that would be extremely hard for anyone! I can be your friend. Anytime you want to talk, I will listen to you!

Armon

1 reply
cyanMoon6064 OP July 31st, 2023

Hello, actually both of us decided to work things out. Ytd we sat down and had one of those conversations that we used to have. Currently, I’m still dealing with my slight depressive episode but we are trying to work things out.

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Ar4571 July 31st, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

Thanks for being willing to listen, I really appreciate it. I’ve basically got friendship issues.

I moved to study at a different university in a different city. I made some friends there but didn’t like it all that much.

So I transferred back to the university in my home-city only to see my previous friends have all moved on. So I’ve basically lost most of my friendships within the last year.

5 replies
cyanMoon6064 OP July 31st, 2023

Oh man. I’m so sorry to hear that. But speaking from someone who had been through college and work, not all of the friendships we get to keep. An example, I didn’t meet my best friend until after I graduated from college and we happened to meet in a Starbucks with this group of friends.


Overall, what I’m really trying to say is, friendships can appear in the weirdest places and strangest circumstances. Sometimes, you just need that one particular friend that makes all of these friendships seem like confetti.

2 replies
Ar4571 July 31st, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

Thanks, that’s a bit reassuring.

you say ‘college’ right? I’m assuming you’re from America then? (I’m asking because I’m from the U.K.) What did you study during your time there?

1 reply
cyanMoon6064 OP July 31st, 2023

Actually I’m not. I’m from Singapore. Majority of the time, I just use terms interchangeably. My course of study was business management, majoring in finance.

And, those close friends that you have through boxing and judo? It’s great especially when you guys have a common interest.

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cyanMoon6064 OP July 31st, 2023

(2/2)

Do you have one particular friend to help you through?

1 reply
Ar4571 July 31st, 2023

@cyanMoon6064

Yeah, on top of University I’ve boxed and done Judo. So I have a few close friends from those places.

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Moonsi August 1st, 2023

Hii moon, it's hard to move but you have to. I am with you as your friend.