it wont end
They always say "itll end some day you just have to wait and the pain will go away. What the hell are you supposed to do when the pain wont go away, when the disease is part of your genes, when every meal is another chance for you to choke, when you choke even though you avoid the foods your allergic to, when you have to watch those close to you turn away and leave the room because youre choking, when you need to make up excuses as to why you never accept food from others or why you never eat during lunch, when youll never be ablr to have kids for fear of passing it on to them, when the only thing that can truly end the problem is the end
Why do i have to be so strong, when others at least get brakes or friends who can relate
@BDRD
hi there, lovely! I just wanted to say that I know what it's like to go through something that others never have even considered, day after day. It's exhausting, and it's frustrating when nobody really understands. I know that it can seem like it will never get better, when you have to live it day in and day out, because I've been there before, where I thought it wouldn't get better unless I ended it. What I realized, though, is that there are a lot of resources, and people willing to hear me out and support me. I know I started with a therapist, which at least gave me the opportunity to explain what it felt like to have to pretend to be okay every day, and maybe talking to a doctor might be able to help, too? I know that a lot of people don't understand what it's like to go through what you are--I can't imagine how hard it must be--but sometimes, they're willing to listen and support you all the same! Please just know that you don't have to go through this alone. We're all here for you <3 Take care, lovely, and stay safe! You can do this <3
time may heal people over time, but if you're already in a negative lifestyle enforced by negative thinking patterns, things will only get worse. its true when they say the path to enlightenment goes through pain and suffering. when one is able to accept and understand their pain, it doesnt hurt as much anymore. the person above had some great ideas, there is people who dont understand but there are also people who do. you may have to open up to people and let them in so they can understand, rather than suffering in silence.
@BDRD I often have this feeling when initially my life gets better but then it seems like everything is terrible again. Some things just don't change. I'm not sure if it is the right thing to say as it is a little bit "pessimistic" but this is just life.
What I can tell you for sure is that if you are looking for somebody who will support and accept you without trying to change then 7cups are just the best place in the Internet. Try to find a listener you connect with and talk to them!
@BDRD
Have you been to a therapist or considered that medication may help? I used to be afraid of medication option until my life was constant pain and I didn't want to keep facing another day of struggling on my own with it. My life did get brighter with the help of the medication which made me more motivated to take care of myself...and taking care of myself was huge to keeping my brain able to function as it should (getting enough serotonin etc. in my meals and from light sources especially).
Also I'm hoping those people at least make sure you aren't choking to death before leaving the room...It sounds uncaring of them from how you're describing it.
@CoinFountain
So far the choking hasn't been that bad. As for the pills, what's the point of living if it's only because of a pill?
@BDRD
Not everyone needs to be on medication permanently. Some people take SSRIs and only need them for a year or so and with doctor's supervision they can go off them never need them again. It's important keeping in touch with doctor to determine how well they are working and discussing side effects etc. Some of them can cause nausea but there are some found to have less side effects on most people at appropriate doses. With mine I needed to get it decreased because it made me too restless so it wasn't even a full pill that helped. I wouldn't say that life after that point is only good because of a pill...The pills won't fix environmental circumstances or behaviors that contributed to it and it doesn't change DNA or cure critical illnesses unrelated to depression...It can however enable one to focus better to a point where they can find meaning and for most people that meaning is not the pill they take itself (unless maybe pharmaceuticals is their passion in life that brings them the most joy). I know it's not going to look like there's much point while "depression talking" is making every positive thought you force yourself to have seem like a lie. It's very hard to see through that much pain. If I'd not tried pills I may never have regained enough energy to focus on self-care and to enjoy anything. I was on them for about a few weeks before I started regaining ability to feel positive about things then after a year I went off of them and didn't need them until a really stressful life situation caused me to relapse. I don't know if I'll continue to have reoccuring need for them but I am hopeful since not everyone does. I'm also doing CBT and trying to exercise more which should help to minimize further ramifications of negative stress sources.
