Why are you struggling with depression how did it start
I got depression after basketball ended in January within the next week I started getting very scared that I might kill someone (anxiety) that lead to depression. And suicidal thoughts
I've kind of always been like this, its only gotten worse though
Being bullied at every school I attended slowly whittled away my confidence. Along followed the depression. Haven't felt like myself for years now.. Managed to climb out of the pit of self harm about 9 months ago. So there's that, I guess.
Depression hit me 3 years ago, just mild and didn't need medication. Just felt like i had a total lack of control over my life and my life wasn't what i wanted it to be. 2 months ago i wanted to commit suicide, i self-harmed and stopped eating. My 10 year relationship ended. I had no friends. I'm still all alone. But it has been 3 weeks since i self-harmed and i'm currently on meds and talking to a clinical psychologist. Things are looking better.
I'm still not sure if I have depression because I haven't convinced my parents to let me get therapy yet. But I've been feeling sad, angry, and/or empty pretty much constantly for about two years. It started when my best friend moved away and I started at a new school. I was lonely all the time because I had trouble trusting people not to abandon me so I didn't really have many friends
I wasn't done typing, that was weird. But anyway I also had really bad social anxiety so maybe that had something to do with it.
ever since I moved out of home for school. I come back for Christmas and summer break but it is never enough. I grew up mostly just hanging out with my family. I never had close friends whom I hung out with outside of school. So coming and living alone is always hard. My family doesn't understand it and rarely call me. They think I need my time to study and that they don't want to disturb me. When they actually do call its for the sake of it and they are at the same time watching tv or eating. So I don't even try and call them or reply to them anymore. Once in awhile I call just to let them know im here. I just live on with my depression.
Mine started when my family was arrested and I got evicted so I had to move all our stuf to my grandmas with no help and my bestfriend left me cause of my parents mistakes :/
My depression started at the age five, I found out the man I looked up to and called daddy for five years wasn't my biological father so he pretty much dropped me. I had my first panic attack at five... My how my problems have gotten worse....
I thought about your question for days now, @Blooker. I wanted to give you my honest answer - I'd really love to do it, wonderful, but I can't. It's impossible for me to say why?, when I have even problems with knowing when?...
My family is the greatest, supporting and funny. I was a loved child. I wasn't bullied, I wasn't abused in any way. I didn't do drugs, didn't drink, I don't even smoke.
The sadness I feel now, has appeared so long ago I cannot pinpoint the moment in time. It came subtly, like the ocean waves embracing the shore. It was a quiet visitor, which made itself a home from my thoughts. I fear, during these past years, it become a part of me, never to be removed.
The only thing which I know for certain was already said by Jane Austen, although in a quite a different context:
"I cannot fix on the hour, or the spot, or the look, or the words, which laid the foundation. It is too long ago. I was in the middle before I knew that I had begun."
I wonder if I knew answers to your questions, would it be easier for me? Would it lift the weight from my mind and shoulders? Would it give me a shield to protect me from sorrow? I don't know, but suddenly I feel uneasiness. Maybe it's better this way.
@Celaeno I'm so glad you brought that up, because I don't have any idea when my depression started either. It seems that the more I try and pin it down, the more difficult it becomes.
@GeekGirlM, I can relate to your experience. It's difficult to trace the exact elements when the whole human psyche is such a complicated patchwork of subtle thoughts and learned behaviour.
Still, every wall is made of bricks and we can learn to notice the crumbled ones and replace them with sturdier materials, if such analogy makes any sense ^^; We are an architects of our own mind and focusing on building healthier, safer responses can save us from drowning in the past and asking questions without answers.
Best wishes, lovely!
I don't know, I wish I did. My depression started when I was around 12, a year before I got the period, so I always heard and read that it's really normal that girls experience strong emotions like "being sad", but the years have been passing and I've been worst and worst, now I'm 20 and I'm a this point in my life where I don't wanna a future, I don't see a future for me, I feel life's too dangerous and I don't wanna be part of it, I live in a dangerous country, people here only think about doing money in easy ways and outside beauty, I'm not sexy, pretty but neither ugly, but I think my beauty is my intelligence, but I'm not either so smart, I just think I'm. I'd love to move to another country but that's not so easy because of the country I live, we have terrible reputation. Maybe all I need in my life is another country, language, a totally different culture, so maybe there I'll feel accepted and I won't care if I cry watching a dog in the park. But I don't know what started my depression the only thing I know it's that I don't feel like wanting life, I'm hopeless, I don't have talents, not beautiful enough, not awesome enough, not smart enough, a totally ungrateful person, a totally loser.
@PurpleAndBlueSunStar you have to think of it like this, everyone is destined for greatness from the poorest of the poor to the richest of the rich, every single person. Circumstances may be slowing you down from shining but never demean your worth. I spent 6 years in the military to get out and return home to nothing but my wife and two dogs. No thank yous no glad to see you're ok nothing. Albert Einstein once said that everyone is a genius but if you judge a fishes ability to climb a tree it will forever think it's stupid. Just because you feel like you're hopeless and useless don't look at it as your downfall but simply the flame in which you will forge yourself in, I don't know your situation nor can I comment on it but if there's one thing I do know its that you are a human being and you're worth just isn't being utilized right. Keep your chin up and keep on knuckling through because your story doesn't end at 20 or 30 or even 80. I'm always open to talk and share my experiences so don't hesitate to look for help when you feel like life has you up against the ropes.
