Suicide
Hi everyone. These last days I've been feeling specially depressed and I've been thinking about killing myself very seriously. I have not enough support since the friends I have can't understand what I go through and some just don't care. And the worst is that some of them have been making me feel like shit because they suck as friends, making me feel even more lonely.
I've been having troubles with my money too and at my job that aren't related to my depression but that also made me feel bad.
I'm struggling with an eating disorder and even though I'm doing waaay better, I don't want to go back to it because I feel sad.
And many more things. I feel extremely lonely, I crave someone to talk to and a hug. There's somebody that I love with all my guts who's gone and I don't know if I'll ever see him again. I think that started it all.
My antidepressants are done and my psychologist disappointed me really bad me.
I know this post kind of random and chaotic but things are going so badly (I've been crying at work, car, home, etc (most of the day) for the last 5 days) but I feel totally alone and I've been thinking about suicide so seriously I'm afraid I will do it this weekend.
Yesterday I was sure I would do it and there's always a moment everyday when I feel completely sure.
I'm just writing here as a desperate need of help. I never had people really loving me in my life and I've been treated really badly (family, psychopath exboyfriend, rape) it's like I can't still find people who will treat me right or love me for who I am and I fear I will never be able to let people love me either. I think I'm a nice girl and I'm trying hard to live my life well (away from drugs, toxic people, being healthy) but I'm like always dragged to the bottom.
I'm a mess. I just need some help. I will appreciate with all my heart any word to help me when I feel worst and I'm about to give it all up.
Thank you *tight hug*
Girl, I'm so incredibly sorry you feel this way and that your friends are b*tches. I want you to know that people do care about you, what about your family? You didn't mention them at all. Please don't do it, there is so much more to you than sadness. Although this may be how you think you'll feel for the rest of your life, trust me, it gets better honey. I'm so happy that you are reaching out for help now, it shows how brave you are and how you're not willing to go down without a fight. Could you maybe try going to a different psychologist or at least call up the helplines in your country? You sound like such a lovely girl, and I'm sure if we met in real life, I'd be your friend. My best friend actually dealt with abuse and rape so I might be able to empathise with you on that one. Love you girl, there's a light at the end of the tunnel. Izzy xxx
Izzy, thank you for being so nice with me. You seem to have such a big heart.
My family was the first people giving me trouble in life, specially my father, my mother and my brother. I grew up surrounded with people who wouldn't treat me well and I think that is one of the reasons I am depressed today.
I'm trying my best always. I read things (including books!) about depression, eating disorders, whatever will help me understand and get better and I did get a lot better but sometimes I go deep down again and lose myself.
I'm thankful you answered this message. To me, is like drowning in deep water and having you tending me your hand. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I wish I could give you a hug for giving hope to someone who lost it and reminding me that I matter. I love you. <3
No worries my dear. I'm sorry your family never supported you, especially when you needed it most. I'm glad you reached out to someone for help, shows how willing you are to get better - I admire that. Love you too darling, I wish you all the best and that you find your way out of the water and back onto land xx
I'm in a similar situation, referring to childhood. But I can't ask for help or demonstrate how I'm really pretending to be happy, but I'm in a moment that I don't care about anything anymore. And this is very difficult for me. I need help and can't go after one.
"Hi, everyone. I would like to share something that has been weighing heavily on me. Lately, I feel like l'm living behind a mask, pretending that I'm okay, but inside, l'm deeply sad and emotionally hurt. I feel extremely tired, without appetite, unable to sleep, and with a sense of discouragement that seems unbearable. I don't want to eat, talk, go out, or interact with anyone
Since I was 14, maybe even earlier, I've been struggling with this, and l've even tried to hurt myself. I don't have a support network, and I feel lost, not knowing how to seek help. I really want to stay here, but it feels like my mind is winning this battle. If anyone has gone through something similar or has any advice, I would really appreciate it. Thank you for listening
@girl3132, please do not follow through on your feelings. Dont let the people that have crapped on you, cause you to make this type of decision. I dont know you, but I really care what happens to you. I know how these types of things feel. I was verbally and physically abused along with being sexually abused by my father. Last summer, I was feeling pretty crappy and crying a lot, something I dont normally do. One morning, I woke up and almost instantly started crying. I have gotten better and I know you can too. Im praying for you. Please dont give up though.
Everyone hates me so much, I try very hard to be the best, my girlfriend left me for dead, my friends are gone, I'm all alone now
I don't know right now what my life is about
Its not hard to feel that way sometimes, but things can get better. You can make some new friends and this time will be just a bad memory you can forget about. Dont give up, I will pray for you also.
I just don't know where's my life is
I know it can be confusing sometimes and feel like everything is lost, but you have to believe that it will get better. My dad abused me a lot of ways, including sexually molesting me and I'm a guy. That's why I'm struggling the way I am. We just need to keep holding each other up, you have many people on this site that are struggling similarly. We didn't ask for things to be done to us, people just took liberties against us that they had no right to do. Hang in there with the rest of us, I know , together that we will make it.
Thank you. You're amazing. I admire you a lot and also love you.
I'm so sorry you had to go through all those things. You're very strong, my friend. Keep it going too <3
@girl3132, thank you for those kind words. You hang in there and keep going. You can get better. Lean on your friends at 7cups.
hey girl, i've been exactly where you are at now, it is horrible to feel like you cant rely on anybody to make you feel better, or worse feeling like nobody genuinely cares, but you should probably try to do something that may change your life, try to rely on yourself and nobody else to be happy, be your own rock, live for youself and be the best version you can of yourself so you dont need anybody to keep your head up. whenever you feel like going back to your old habits, look at yourself in the mirror and ask yourself if you really want to do that to yourself, after the hell you've been through because of it, do you really wanna go back there? start from 0? look at the future as a place full of oportunities, you're young you know you've got the world in your hand and you can make anything you want from it, so why make it hell? set yourself goals, everyday, something that keeps you going, doesnt matter what it is, make it your reason to wake up in the morning and dont stop until you achieve it and then set another goal. you dont have to depend on anybody's support to keep you going, you're strong enough to go through this and show everyone how brave you are when you get out of this. i know it is hard when you have gone through so many things, i have too and sometimes i wonder why does everything keep happening to me but then i remember how much i've learnt and grown from all of these experiences, for example i am currently a victim of psychological and fisical violence at home but this shows he how i dont want to parent my kids in the future. learn from it, dont pity yourself, and remember you're not alone but sometimes you will be and that's when you need to rely on yourself to make the best out of an awful situation
lots of love, contact me if you need anything ❤️
hey there, I'm so sorry you're feeling like this. Just sounds awful. BUT you should be happy at the fact that you came on here, expressed how you were feeling and reached out. Some people can't do that, the fact that you did is a really positive thing.
I can relate to feeling lonely..it has been so bad that i had suicidal thoughts as well. However, being lonely makes you want to try new things even more. I'm more open to joining groups and chatting to people, even thinking about going back to college and getting some qualifications. Perhaps that's something you could think about? All i can suggest is DISTRACT YOURSELF. Distract yourself with positive things, listen to calming music, watch a crappy tv show, see if there are any groups/meet ups in your area.
I hope you feel better soon, take care of yourself.
I hope
My only friends are various customer service workers and that's only because they're paid to be nice. People have to be paid to be my friends or at least nice to me. The friends I had, I'd try to help them but I know I can never go to them.
I can't go to my family because they'd just penalize me or say 'not now' as they worry about their own crap or my brother.
My love life is horrible. Nobody sticks around when they realize I'm a person with my own personality.
I have no money and I'm stuck in a town I hate.
I won't sit here and tell you it gets better, because I don't know that, and neither does anyone else.BUT I know it's only going to be as good as you make it. So just sleep, and when you wake up, be PROUD that you are still on this broken Earth of ours. Then the next day. Sleep, wake, go out for a few minutes. Nest day, sleep, wake, compliment a stranger. IDK, baby steps, just do what you have to do to feel better. Rember happiness is an emotion, not a destination. It will come and go, but it's like a bommerang too. Its DESTINED to come back =D
I don't know what to do anymore.