Suicide
Hi everyone. These last days I've been feeling specially depressed and I've been thinking about killing myself very seriously. I have not enough support since the friends I have can't understand what I go through and some just don't care. And the worst is that some of them have been making me feel like shit because they suck as friends, making me feel even more lonely.
I've been having troubles with my money too and at my job that aren't related to my depression but that also made me feel bad.
I'm struggling with an eating disorder and even though I'm doing waaay better, I don't want to go back to it because I feel sad.
And many more things. I feel extremely lonely, I crave someone to talk to and a hug. There's somebody that I love with all my guts who's gone and I don't know if I'll ever see him again. I think that started it all.
My antidepressants are done and my psychologist disappointed me really bad me.
I know this post kind of random and chaotic but things are going so badly (I've been crying at work, car, home, etc (most of the day) for the last 5 days) but I feel totally alone and I've been thinking about suicide so seriously I'm afraid I will do it this weekend.
Yesterday I was sure I would do it and there's always a moment everyday when I feel completely sure.
I'm just writing here as a desperate need of help. I never had people really loving me in my life and I've been treated really badly (family, psychopath exboyfriend, rape) it's like I can't still find people who will treat me right or love me for who I am and I fear I will never be able to let people love me either. I think I'm a nice girl and I'm trying hard to live my life well (away from drugs, toxic people, being healthy) but I'm like always dragged to the bottom.
I'm a mess. I just need some help. I will appreciate with all my heart any word to help me when I feel worst and I'm about to give it all up.
Thank you *tight hug*
Death seems to be my only say out. I don't know how much more I can take.
Girls, the both of you, nothing is worth taking your own lives! Call out for help, please! Death is permanent, your circumstances are not! Melon, your brother's a big jerkface, your mom thinks you'll help, but has your influence helped so far? No? What makes her think you'll help him now that he's an adult? Flora, I don't know your story, but it's not worth it, really!
Thanks, but it's not just that. I want to be free and out of the town I live but I'm beginning to think it won't happen even if I don't end it.
I don't think anyone would miss me. I have no friends, I'm sure my family doesn't like me, my love life is horrible because every man I meet only likes the idea if me, my career's stalled.
@creativeMelon1653 We would miss you and the world would miss you. Every single life has importance and beauty. Destroying that beauty leaves the world poorer for it's loss, even if you don't feel it right now (nobody does really) you ARE beautiful and you DO bring beauty to the world just by being there. Don't ever give up!
I shouldn't be so unhappy at this age yet I can't seem to feel anything other than this sadness. It's like a whirlpool of every moment that you don't want to remember but you do. Everyone says that all I need to do is go to school, eat and sleep but they forgot about the whole trying to fight a battle part that only ends in you being so sad you want to die either way.
@Jackiexpham, I can understand your feelings. It is really hard going through the motion of the day when no one can really comprehend how difficult, how overwhelming it is to for you to struggle and fight. It is exhausting.
I'm sorry that you have to be so brave, lovely. No one deserve this misery. I really hope that next days will be kinder for you. We are here if you want to talk about anything. You are not alone. You don't have to battle in silence.
*hugs*
Hi I don't know how old you are but maybe in your 20s. I understand you as in my 20s I attempted suicide 2 times. If I could go back in time and meet the young me (now I am 50), I would tell not to even try that, not even waste my daily time thinking about that. Because even though at the time I thought it was never going to get better for long enough to feel better, it actually did. I had something in my life after my 35s, that I am so grateful I could experience. So forget about this suicide thing, and get to 50 years old minimum and you will see I am right.
I know I'm too late but I sincerely hope you're doing alright. Your friends are the worst. They should try to understand what you're going through. Sometimes the darkness seems endless but I promise you there's light at the end of the tunnel. Don't give up and hold on tight to hope. If you're feeling depressed try doing something you like (music,art, shopping,books). Or just move your body. It helps.It really does.Or write down your worries in a paper.Let it all out. Write down every haunting, silly or sad thoughts. And then burn it. And don't think about it anytime soon.
Take care. Love you.
@girl3132 I am really sorry that life has been hard for you for some time. How are you now? I hope it's a little better. Sometimes things start doing downhill all at once and this leads to sense of despair. I am a listener here at 7 cups and if you want we can talk and reconnect any time. Please take care of yourself and know that you can rely on this community 💕
