New Wave
I'd been feeling better for a while. I went on a trip, got a good brain reset, but after working all week and dealing with my problems again, I feel like i'm slipping back into something.
Having a hard time concentrating on things I like to do, mostly worrying about scheduling and not feeling like i have enough time to myself. I'm constantly a week ahead of myself, trying to plan for the future instead of where i am right now.
I am also second-guessing all of my relationships with people. Coworkers, friends, everyone. I know it makes no sense, but i keep getting the creeping feeling that I'm annoying and nobody likes me anymore. ( which i know isn't true because of the behaviors that these people exhibit, but my brain tells me otherwise anyway?)
I'm stuck on what to do with myself. I have many projects that I am in the middle of that I would love to work on, but I can't seem to focus on anything.
I haven't been eating well. It's hard for me to cook for myself, and getting food outside of the house is often time consuming, and I don't have as much time as i would like.
The house is dirty because the other people who live here don't clean up after themselves, and it makes it harder for me to clean. I have a few household items (ex. my bedroom lamp) that have suddenly broken down and i have to replace them.(Which may have to wait, since i have to build up my money again after the trip)
I also have the equivalent of 3 jobs at the moment, as well as a budding art career, which makes scheduling difficult.
I'm guessing that there are a lot of environmental stressors that I can work on in my living space.
anyway, my plate is very full and I don't think I like it this way.