Personify Your Depression: If my depression were a person... [fill in the blank]
Personify Your Depression: I learned about this coping technique today. Imagine that your depression is a person separate from you. The idea is that personifying our depression helps remind us that depression doesn't define who we are ourselves, and that invasive self-critical thoughts we experience often come from our depression and not our healthy minds. Some things to think about are: what kind of person would it be, what kind of hobbies would it have, what would it look like, what would its name be?
So, if your depression were a person, what kind of person would it be?
There gender changes, but it's like smoke. You can see it and you feel like you should be able to brush it away. But its stays firmly there.
My depression in personified would look like a ghost.
Fran Drescher. Constantly nagging and laughing inappropriately.
If my depression was a person, she's the part of me that died. She's the parts of my soul that shattered at traumas. She's the parts of my heart that chipped away at heartaches. She's the part of me that broke away and watched blankly as I screamed under the pressures of life because she could feel no more. She's the part of me that is broken. She wants gone, she sees no point to anything. She's manipulative and cynical, always dressed in a black robe- like a widow. She keeps trying to drown in the rivers of thought, but as long as I stay afloat she can not die. She hates me for keeping her here.
I can't see it, but i know it's here. It's like it's constantly telling you that you are not good enough and that you do not deserve the things that you have. It's like it's someone that you look up to and that person always tells you that you are doing everything wrong and you are just messing up everything. It's someone that constantly cheers on your failures. It's something that scares you so much and brings so much anxiety and keeps you worried that you feel like sometimes there is no getting out of that situation. It tends to make you think about things and "solutions" and on the spot you find it like a good idea without even thinking about the impact that this action will have.
If my depression were a person, I would thank it and be grateful for being with me and made me a stronger person. I would tell it that I no longer need them anymore and that I am ready to face the world.
Depression for me is a mindset. I just want to be able to love someone and have it back. Its like a black sheep i just want to be able to have what they have but i cant because i just end up lonely and wanting to be apart of them. I dont to feel lonely anymore and have a chance to experience something ive never felt before. I just want to feel something. I dont want to be alone anymore.
This is kinda funny because to me atleast one of the deep roots of my current depression is a person in my head.
My depression is a person, they are trapped, scared and alone. They don't want to comprehend what happened to them and it lives in a place so alone it has not connected with reality in a long. It doesn't know how to let go of the past and the ghosts it brings. It hates itself and it is hated for what it allowed to happen. They are very very cold, they can never get warm. They are exhausted, they have given up. My depression is a girl and it wants so desperately to be saved yet it knows it wasn't.
Depression is some kind of beast. Every face different, every face the same. I recognize so many of them, so many shout outs (crackedglass here on page 24 for one).
My own depression is an old blanket i carry with me everywhere. Since forever. Like linus in the Peanuts cartoons. It's my oldest friend, my one true and faithful companion. My safety blanket, wrapped around my shoulders in the dark and tucked under my chin while i sleep.I honestly do not know myself without it. Seen from the outside, it is the millstone around my neck, the anchor at my heels. But i cannot escape it. I am too afraid and even if i wasn't, i am unable. It has fully corrupted my mind against any reason. It's literally all the identity i have left.
It hates me like i hate me. It believes everything i think or say or do is stupid and worthless, just as i do. We agree on everything, a perfect match! I cannot see past it and i cannot imagine living without it. We are one, my depression is me. The coat i wear even as i sweat by a fire. The rope i reach for as it drags me underwater. Honestly, I don't know any other way to be.
Please excuse all the miserable metaphors. I really am lost. and depression is my guide.
I hope we all find a better way.
My depression would be named 'broken' (I don't know why). It is broken because my self-confidence, my self-esteem, my optimistism are all broken. I'm feeling lost and I can't find any way to make it believe to myself that I can live like a normal person. My depression may not be deep like many of you, but still I can't find way to get out of it. I'm in a maze and every path seems broken. I can't escape anywhere.
If my depression was a person, she'd be me. Just the thinest layer over my skin, like a layer of dust I've worn for so long I no longer remember what it feels like without it. So thin I can't tell the difference between my depression's weight and my own body. Not a nagging voice in my ear but a slight echo that arrives before my own thoughts.
