Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?
Empty, anxious, scared, depressed...
I couldn't go to work today, I couldn't even go out of the house to take my son to school. I'm exhausted. I have finally given up all hope of ever beating the enormous abyss that I've fallen down.
I am worthless. I am a waste of time. I am a lost cause.
My mother has washed her hands of me, where does that leave me? I am utterly and truly lost!
I can't find help, even if someone tried, my paranoid brain tells me they are just being nice because they pity me because they feel sorry for me.
"Never discourage anyone...who continually makes progress, no matter how slow"
This helps me through some bad times. It might not seem like it but you are making progress. Coming on 7 Cups and sharing your feelings isn't an easy thing but you are doing it and I'm proud of you. Don't give up...alot of us have or are going through the "black dog of depression" and are here to support eachother.
Sometimes all you have to do is with all your strength just hang on. Sometimes that's all we can do for the day, month, year. In those times these lyrics from my favorite song helped me. "When the waves are taking you under, hold on just a little bit longer, he knows that this is going to make you stronger." Stronger by Mandissa
So i guess ill get started. I have this horrible problem with everytime I get ahead in life I shut down and throw it all away. I did this again a couple weeks ago. I broke up with my girlfriend after I acted stupid quit my job and moved out of state on a whim. Its like I couldnt control myself and its not the first time i have done this. I feel like I cant truly be happy and i bottle everything up and blow up then try to change everything around me to make it better. My girlfriend any guy would be jealous over. She was ridiculously beautifull and really cared and loved me and i just broke her heart because of my own insecurities. I dont know what to do any more.
Dude, call her
Ive tried shes already dating around which she has all rights to. She said she has to get over me.
Every day I mostly feel empty... Like I am so used to the pain, i turn numb. For example today I felt so broken that I tried to cry but i just couldnt seem to. It is that feeling of a knot full of emotions stuck in my throat that I cant get out.
i feel dead, sometimes i dont even now how i feel
I just want to stop trying. I want to be locked in my room until I feel okay. I'm sick of people and I'm sick of giving a crap about everything, really.
I don't feel like anything today
I feel like even on this website full of "listeners" i am ignored
@TatumTatum You aren't being ignored! Everyone is here for you! I know it may not feel that way, but the more you interact, the more you'll get feedback. Open up and let people know what's going on in different parts of the site.
I was all good until news started going around about an eighth grader that went to my school. Turns out she committed last night by moving out in front of moving traffic... Rest her soul.
But I'm irritated because people on social media are posting things about depression now. Its not even original thoughts or anything. Its this long paragraph about a made up girl ending her life. Her little brother finds her and doesn't understand why his parents are a wreck. The people in school that bullied her or talked about her behind her back start hating themselves or start breaking down because they lost someone and felt bad. And just a whole bunch of stuff mashed up into one thing. All the people on social media do is copy and paste it.
I'm irritated because it took one girl to act on the feeling that she had nothing left to live for for people to actually start paying attention to something big that is happening. And they don't even put there own thoughts about it out there! They copy and paste a made up story that they'll probably forget 5 minutes later!
It's aggravating and sad how people only notice when something traumatic happens....
I may not have known her, but I hope she's in a better place..
I can't trust anyone I hate myself I hate my life and I don't know I why I wanna cry but I just wanna cuz I know it hurts but I don't know why I'm sad
