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Depression Community - How do you actually feel today?

Laura December 2nd, 2014

Let us know in 1-3 sentences. Post every day!

4943
pinkDime3962 August 31st, 2015

i fear my deppresion is harming my relationship with my husband, he is trying so hard and i feel as if im just pushing him away, i love him but on saturday i said i am only here for you i would have given up a long time ago otherwise. and since telling him the truth just feel even more worse now and with what my mind is saying i want to follow and not be around no more.

1 reply
Supervan1 August 31st, 2015

You have to fight. ....fight hard to find the light..its there. I am asking you as a stranger your husband loves you let him help you find the light that he loves in you. I am sorry you are so sad you think this way....but its just for right now. (Not saying how you feel is wrong i am just saying this will pass and you can be strong).....please fight to find the light to your happiness.

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Supervan1 August 31st, 2015

Today i feeling like screaming at the top of my lungs. ......leave me alone....stop abusing me.....i dont want to hurt any more....I am extremely sad and my depression has a hold in me all i want to do is live life and be happy.

1 reply
Celaeno August 31st, 2015

Lovely @Supervan1, I completely understand your wants. I also struggle with depression and I wish sometimes I'd never get ill with that hideous monstrosity. It makes wonderful people believe that they're worthless. But it's not true. It's just a sly persuasion from your brain.

I'm glad that you've reached out. You're not alone. We will always listen, we will hold your hand and walk through this dark times together. We have depression, but depression doesn't have us. We are more than a medical term, darling. We won't let it define us.

Remember to slow down, and take a good care of yourself. From my own experience I know that lowering your goals, and focusing only on getting enough sleep, drinking water, eating 3 meals and going outside in the sun, can already make a difference. Even if it's not a big one, it's worth the effort. And so are you, amazing warrior.

Sending you lots of hugs!

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ConfodentialLoser August 31st, 2015

I have a big headache from crying and im feeling very suicidal. Don't know how long I can last..

1 reply
Celaeno August 31st, 2015
TW: suicide

My lovely @ConfodentialLoser, it must be so hard for you. You must feel so exhausted from the constant fight.

My wonderful, let me hug you. Let me shield you from the pain. Let me bring you soft pillows and a warm blanket. Let me bake you cookies. Let me play your favourite music. Let me watch movies with you. Let me show you the stars on the bright sky. I can teach you how to find the constellations. Let me make you hot chocolate to warm you. Let me read a book out loud, so you can visit beautiful places. I care. I am here.

You're so brave and strong, darling, even if you don't believe it. You feel desperate to find a solutions. My lovely, my amazing let me point you to it:

please, click here.

You can do it. I know you want to ease your sufferings, I understand it. My bravest, I just ask you for 5 minutes to give yourself the opportunity to read it. You can do it. You are so strong, you survived all of the hardships. Give yourself 5 minutes, my love.

After reading, I encourage you to visit this website and make a simple call. Or if you don't like to call, chat in here. There are a lot of people who can help.

We are here for you. We will hold you tightly, when you feel like letting go. We won't let go.

Please, let me know how are you feeling now. I'd love to hear from you.

*hugs*

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TruthSpilling22 August 31st, 2015

I have been doing so well. I started healthy things to help my mind, like eating better, drinking water, exercising regularly, and actually communicating with people. Despite this, I've had depression symptoms coming back. My sleeping is all screwed up again, and I've been spending a lot of time not doing anything. I'm afraid it's going to get really bad again, like it was a few months ago. I'm just really scared. I don't want to be sick again.

2 replies
Mutelock August 31st, 2015

Recovery isn't a smooth road. You'll fall down sometimes, but the good thing is you'll get better at climbing back up each time it happens. It might get worse again, but that's okay. It will also get better again afterwards. You know now that it's possible to take steps in the right direction and you should try to remember that, no matter how rough things will get again. You're still fighting, even when you feel like you're failing. Trust your strength, because look how far you already came! Next time, you'll go even further!

Lemontime20 August 31st, 2015

Your path to get out of your depression will be a journey. And that journey will include visiting back to the dark place sometimes. Don't be afraid of it. You have already had success in getting to a stable place once. So now you are equipped with tools you didn't have before. So even if you go back you will be able to pull yourself out faster. Remind yourself how good your healthy habits felt. These habits are like a muscle. You repeatedly have to use a muscle to make it stronger. Going back gives you an opportunity to use those self reliance muscles again and this time they will get a little bit stronger than before. So don't recoil, look at it like a challenge and tell yourself I got this! "A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor."

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Hollywoodglitter August 31st, 2015

I feel so emotionless. Today I lost my job for something I didn't do and today I will be getting an eviction notice for again something I didn't do. I think today I'll take that pregnancy test so it can be negative and the day can be complete

1 reply
Adrim August 31st, 2015

I'm so sorry for that hun, that sound hard. But when the storm stops it comes the rainbow <3

Maybe the destiny have something better for you, even better that you can imagine, so be srtong and we're all here for you!

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findingNiko August 31st, 2015

Sleepy. All I seem to do lately is sleep. That's odd, coming from this insomniac. I cannot escape from under the guilt-quilt, it's too heavy. So I just sleep. About to take another nap now...

1 reply
Adrim August 31st, 2015

I totally understand you. I'm insomniac too and I'm awake all night but when it comes the sun, I'm sleepy and I just sleep all day, idk what's happening to my body.

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SimplySunshine7 August 31st, 2015

Today I'm feeling quite dizzy. Going to the restroom causes me to have rapid heart rate when I get ack to my room. I don't have much of an appetite. Just really having a rough time right now.

1 reply
Celaeno September 1st, 2015

Dear @SimplySunshine7, I'm so sorry to hear that. It must be really hard for you.

Can I hug you, lovely?

*hugs gently*

I'm so proud of you, darling. You are doing such a great job, fighting no matter of the depth of your heartaches, You're wonderful, did you know that?

Sending lots of love!

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August 31st, 2015

Exhausted. I can feel you all, people.

2 replies
Adrim August 31st, 2015

Same.

Celaeno September 1st, 2015

Thank you for your compassion, @alexlove. It's a great feeling to be understood by others.

Take a good care of yourself, you're worth it, lovely!

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Lostandconfused66 August 31st, 2015

I stopped crying now all I feel is numb and hollow, I've become very good at my laughs. So far no one suspects anything, I feel so alone. Nothing seems bright anymore, I can't sleep or eat. I'm surviving.

1 reply
Adrim September 1st, 2015

I see that you're too sad right now, but you're not alone! This community (including me) are here to support you<3

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Adrim August 31st, 2015

I feel stressed. I'm kinda scared bc in a few days school is gonna start and... ugh. But at the same time I'm feeling safe, bc I'm in home rn where nobody can hurt me. (I know it's strange but sometimes I feel two totally different emotions at the same time, or first one then just in a few moments another)

1 reply
Celaeno September 1st, 2015

@Adrim, I feel the same! I try to enjoy my peace in my home, the company of people who love me and care for me, but at the same time I am having a hard time hiding from my anxiety. Vision of school scares me a bit. I'm glad I am not alone.

You are not alone. We can make it through, darling. This stressful times will pass eventually, but you and I will survive. We will stand strong on the ground, tall as oaks in the forest.

*hugs*

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