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Work Prompt #16 What are your experiences with respect in the workplace?

User Profile: ASilentObserver
ASilentObserver April 5th

Welcome back all, I hope you are all taking it easy on yourself at work this week.

Last week we discussed: What underlying beliefs and thought patterns are contributing to feeling overwhelmed or exhausted?  Thank you to all who participated and shared their thoughts for discussion. I enjoyed them. I hope you all did too. If you didn't share yours, please share them here and I look forward to reading and discussing them with you.


This week's prompt: What are your experiences with respect in the workplace?


In last week's discussion, @Jaeteuk suggested discussing more about a respectful workplace. So this discussion is dedicated to exploring that aspect of the workplace and how it affects us or what are our experiences. A respectful workplace is essential for everyone's well-being and productivity. It is where we feel valued, heard, and safe to contribute our best. But what exactly does a respectful workplace look like, and how can we create one? Let's talk about that together on one or all below prompts to deep dive into our specific experiences with respect in the workplace: 

  • Have you ever felt disrespected by a colleague or manager?
  • What are some positive examples of respectful interactions you've witnessed?
  • What are some of the key elements you think contribute to a respectful work environment


I am looking forward to discussing these issues and sharing experiences to support each other in this journey towards emotional well-being.




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Hey Obs and everyone else, how's it going 🙂

My experience with respect in the workplace is it starts with me and ends with me.

1 reply
User Profile: ASilentObserver
ASilentObserver OP April 6th

@communicativePond1728 It sounds like you feel responsible for maintaining respect in the workplace. How does that feel?


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User Profile: Jaeteuk
Jaeteuk April 5th

Hello Obs, thank you for making this into a discussion!

At my workplace, we are needed to do an online course once every couple of years about Respectful Workplace. The material doesn't change, but act as a reminder to what it means. From what I remember from the course, respecting people you work with goes in different levels. Respecting one another's space, respecting colleagues' rights, being respectful in communication, etc.

From experience, I feel that my colleagues do not respect me. Like how I dealt with a conflict a few years ago, I spoke to the specific persons involved. But for them, rather than telling me that they don't like how I talked to them (or that they misinterpreted my intentions). If they acted according to the Respectful Workplace, they should've came to me to tell me their feelings and not take it up to their Manager. Our so-called "miscommunication, misinterpretation of what I told them, the conflict it caused" could've ended if they had told me that they didn't like me contacting them personally about things that they could do better/correctly. If they had respected me in that sense and told me themselves personally, like I had contacted them, then, the entire situation wouldn't have escalated to our Managers, and resulted me getting investigated. We're both under the same Union, but our Union Rep. stood on my side. As he says I followed the protocol of Respectful Workplace. There should be levels of communication of conflict between colleagues. I was trying to follow the steps, but they are the ones who skipped everything. Although the investigation ended after one meeting, those colleagues that ganged up on me to file a complaint to their Manager, one of them has not put it past them yet. It's been more than 2 years since it happened!

Now, this specific colleague will be joining my team in a couple of weeks, as she got a position in the Relief line until end of November. From what had happened before, I apologized to her and the others for speaking in a way that made them feel uncomfortable. Although it took me almost a year to get over the devastation of how that they filed a complaint against me, I've put it aside and tried to act normally towards her.

I've raised my concerns to my current Manager. She knows of the incident, but she wasn't the Manager that dealt with my investigation back then, but I guess it's on my file. So I raised the concern to her that as much as I will act professionally when interacting with her, the problem is on her end, not mine. With her behaviour towards me over these years, has shown that she does not like to work with me, nor talk to me. So, my concern to work with someone who doesn't like me, I asked what I can do to make the situation work out. Also, I mentioned that when 2 of my current colleagues plan to retire in the next couple of years, that person will eventually get a permanently position here. When that time comes, I'm not sure if I'll be able to withstand her negative attitude towards me. Especially with the colleagues on the rest of the team have all started working in the same department back in the day, they have all known each other for more than a decade. While, to her, I'm always that newbie.

As much as I'm following the way of a Respectful Workplace, when there is someone who doesn't like to work with me, that Respectful Workplace means nothing and it will just create a negative atmosphere between us. I'm a little worried for the next 7 months that she will be a part of my team, I only hope that it doesn't interfere with my mental health and affect my productivity.

@ASilentObserver

4 replies
User Profile: ASilentObserver
ASilentObserver OP April 6th

@Jaeteuk I am glad you open up about difficult experience with some colleagues in the past, and, understandably, it would leave you feeling concerned about future interactions. I think you have taken steps to address the situation by raising your concerns with your manager and expressing your worries about maintaining a professional relationship.

I am sure you know that it is important to prioritize your own well-being and productivity, and if you feel that the situation may negatively impact you, it may be worth exploring options for support or adjusting your work environment. Respect in the workplace is essential, and it is okay to advocate for yourself to ensure a positive work environment. You got this and we are all here rooting for you <3 

3 replies
User Profile: Jaeteuk
Jaeteuk April 6th

Thank you, Obs.

My brother and I are making a second attempt to re-launching our business. So, hopefully it succeeds this time around. I'm being hopeful. Once our earnings exceed my salary, I will consider quitting my job during the time this colleague gets a permanent position. Or only request to work shifts when she's on vacation. I may not quit entirely, because I do like the work I do, and all the other staff I work with, nurses, doctors, surgeons.. It'll be a bit too much to quit a job I like, because of one person that doesn't get along with me.

I haven't gotten any reply from my Manager yet. But I'll give her another week, since I sent her the email the day she returned from a week of vacation. So, she probably have a ton of email to get through. Hopefully my subject line (raising a concern) catches her attention.

@ASilentObserver

2 replies
User Profile: ASilentObserver
ASilentObserver OP April 8th

@Jaeteuk Yay!!  That sounds exciting about your and your brother's business. I am wishing you both the best. What are some of the things that didn't go well the first time around?


1 reply
User Profile: Jaeteuk
Jaeteuk April 8th

I launched it last June and still haven't made any earnings yet. So this time, we have a one-on-one coach to provide us more guidance.

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User Profile: Enthenia
Enthenia April 7th

I have meant to respond to this but just haven't. I am doing so now. I think it's one-sided. Respect must be given out but not expected to be received. I have mentioned my circumstances before so I won't. Besides, I have promised someone that she can go out and play with a toy soon. I'm trying to rest my foot for as long as possible. 

A dog accidentally ran into it yesterday. She was small but very sturdy. It felt a little like running into a wall. Have it wrapped & it doesn't hurt like yesterday but I have work tomorrow and staying home isn't an option.

3 replies
User Profile: ASilentObserver
ASilentObserver OP April 8th

@Enthenia I hear you Enthenia. You have been through quite an ordeal with your foot injury and have been showing great determination by prioritizing your responsibilities. I am glad you are taking care of yourself.  Please take things one step at a time and focus on getting some rest before your shift. We are all here with you thinking and rooting for you

2 replies
User Profile: Enthenia
Enthenia April 8th

@ASilentObserver Thanks. I think wrapping it for a bit helped. Tried putting ice on it over the weekend but the dog took the ice pack & I had to get it from her before she chewed it up. But, I can stand and walk fine. Can't do any pivots though.

Fortunately, I have a foot rest at work and the monthly assignments don't seem too insane this month.

Unfortunately, I am already confused with my first assignment for my new programming course and that's due next week. 

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